Month: December 2021

Okay, not to bum anyone out.

I’m hoping that when you read about my year, you’ll feel immensely better about yours! If your year has been the same, or worse… At least you’ll know you’re not alone.

This has been an unbelievably bad year for me. (No, It’s not solely Biden’s Fault! To be honest though, he sure hasn’t done me any favors. Then again, when has the government done any of us any favors? Just Sayin!)

The year started okay. I was happy to finally have all the election bullshit behind us and was looking forward to actually finding a job.

I’ve found over time that the 6 months around Presidential election years suck for job searches. I’ve concluded that corporate America just holds its collective breath, (and the purse strings,) until they know which way the wind is going to blow for the next four years.

Late 2020 was no different. I’d assert that 2020 was more like a year where a two term president is being replaced after terming out. Since that usually results in a change of Presidential party, and corporate America is a lot slower to start hiring again afterward.

Just about the time corporate America was starting to settle down and ready to open their purse strings. Well then there was Delta. Ooopps! Yet another stutter.

At the end of March, one of my brothers took his own life.

Suddenly, the job search wasn’t all that important. I drove across country to attend the funeral, and spend time with the family. It was a difficult time, however, amidst the emotional trauma, there were good things. I got to spend time with my sister, and my other brothers. I spent time with my Mom, Stepdad and Aunt.

I was also able to confirm what I had suspected about my Mom. She’s fading. Her memory is developing faults. On her side of the family, I don’t know the processes leading to end of life.

On my Father’s side I know the process because there were many examples. Typically, Dads side it’s just someone doesn’t wake up. On my Mother’s side there are only two examples. One is my Grandmother who died quite young from a stroke, the other was my Grandfather. He died in his 80s one Sunday morning getting ready for church.

My Mother is in that later age range now. Since I was living across the country, I missed seeing the process with my Grandfather. Did he start slowing down? Did his mind start going? Was he napping more during the day?

My Mother and Aunt, have both beaten the 50% odds that they’d die young. There is some evidence that my Grandfather experienced the same kind of decline I’m observing in my Mother.

Thankfully, I’m not alone in my observations. My Sister detected some of the fade. My Aunt was more keenly aware but was keeping her own council, until I mentioned it.

Then once the subject was open, she and I synchronized our observations and found that each of us had noticed different things. Our sharing of information gave us both a more complete picture, and the beginnings of a plan to address the situation. Our hope is to make this time as easy as possible for my Mother.

Fortunately, my Aunt is as pragmatic as I am. We both know it will take all our strength and love to move through this with grace. We also know that we will have to share our combined strengths to carry each other through grief.

Our talking together, made what is to come less fearful. If for no other reason than we’re not alone.

I came home mid to late April without incident. I took a different route and saw some sights that I’d never seen. We live in a beautiful country. Seeing it slowly mile after mile is a lot of fun if you’ve got the time.

I’d been home about a month.

On a bright sunny day, while walking the dog, he took off after something in the bushes. That would have been fine except that I had my thumb hooked in the pocket of my jeans, and the four fingers of the same hand were holding the leash.

He is very strong and very fast. In this case he had enough leash to reach full speed before it locked. 60+ Pounds of dog moving at top speed then suddenly restrained by the leash. Physics tells us that approximately half that momentum will travel back along the leash to the point of restraint even as the heavy object at the end of the leash is yanked backward toward the point of restraint. With my thumb hooked in the pocket of my jeans all that force concentrated in the area of skin and tendons that attach the thumb to the palm of the hand.

There’s probably some elegant calculation that could determine the exact amount of force. Let’s just ditch the physics lesson and say it was a lot. The resulting gash where the skin tore was bloody all the way home, and painful for about 5 minutes.

I’m one of those people that feels the initial damage and then the damaged area goes numb. It’s still functional even though it’s a bloody mess. I’ve always attributed this peculiarity to my Nordic ancestry.

This is perhaps a specious attribution, but the logic behind it is that if you’re descended from a warrior people, swinging swords around and slashing at your enemies, you’d better be able to take some hits and keep on fighting.

So The dog and I walked back the 2 miles to the house. Along the way I decided that I needed to start carrying a first aid kit for each of us. I got home, cleaned and assessed the wound. Then I put the pieces of skin back into their rightful positions and bandaged it.

Later in the evening I re-cleaned and re-bandaged the wound with some better supplies. That was when the trouble started. In reworking the bandages and applying some antibiotic ointment a small bit of skin got turned under another piece of skin and began to really hurt in a strange way.

Off to the urgent care I go. I just wanted more skilled eyes looking at this mess. My concern was I didn’t want to lose functionality on the thumb joint when it healed.

Unfortunately, the urgent care was closed, but the emergency room (located in the same hospital) was open. 3 hours and $6000.00 later the Physician’s Assistant had corrected the problem and glued my hand back together. (At the time I didn’t know it was 6K.) Had I known, I would have said, “Thanks but no thanks!” Although I did get my tetanus booster so I guess that’s a plus.

Getting home at 3am didn’t help my disposition but at least now I could sleep.

The next day I slept off & on and the dog was very sweet keeping me company. He smelled and saw a lot of blood the day before and is smart enough to recognize one of the pack had been injured. He couldn’t lick the wound due to the bandages so he contented himself with licking the fingers of that hand.

Two days after the ripped hand. A very loud bang reverberated through the house. I was in the bedroom at the time and initially thought something had hit the house. Then I heard the unmistakable sound of water.

One of the pipes in the fire suppression system running through the ceiling had ruptured. There’s a lot of pressure behind these systems and in less than a minute the living room was flooded. Since it was obvious something broke, and there was no fire, I ran through the standing water to the basement so that I could shut the fire suppression system off.

In hindsight I should have let it run…

It was only after the valve was shut off and I was standing barefooted in the water that I remembered there were several power strips lying on the floor, now also in standing water.

When I’d purchased those power strips, I had planned well. I’d bought top of the line heavily shielded and sealed units. (there should be a saying like, “Buy the right thing the first time and you’ll never regret the purchase”) That is possibly why I didn’t have to make another trip to the emergency room.

This led to several months of living in 2/3 of the house. (Had I let the water keep running feigning ignorance of the operation of the valves, I could have spent those months in a nice hotel.)

Ahh Hindsight!

Instead, I did the right thing. There’s a lesson there. Nice guys and guys who do the right thing get screwed!

Anyhow the next few months were spent with strangers tromping in and out of the house. The remediation folks were a pain in the ass. The reconstruction folks were amazing! I’d already cleaned everything I could clean because I was worried about the dog licking up the antifreeze that had been in the pipes. I did this literally with one hand tied behind my back.

As it turned out, I heal faster than the house does. My hand was actually fully repaired about 6 weeks before the house was.

Due to the supply crunch we had to wait for materials. Some of the necessary materials were on ships and others were on trucks. Neither of which could navigate their way to distribution points. (Thanks Joe!)

During all the moving things around, walking the dog twice a day, and I think falling once on a hike I screwed up my knee.

This was near the end of the reconstruction and meant that I was laying on the bed with my knee on a pillow. There were days when I’d seriously choose to hold off going to the bathroom as long as possible simply because it hurt so bad to try to walk.

The other half took over the dog walking duties. Much to the disappointment of the dog since by that time he was used to walking 5 miles a day.

At one point, I couldn’t get my knee into my jeans because of the swelling. So I was in shorts and a knee brace for all of the summer and part of fall. Driving a clutch vehicle was iffy at best so I was also stuck here in the house.

I did get mad enough in September / October that I sanded and painted the trim of the house. That’s called boredom. Oh sure I paid for those days outside in the sun with my knee being pissed off, but being outside was so worth it. The house looks much better too.

Throughout all this time I was still sending out resumes and cover letters. I was applying to anything remotely in my field and getting no replies. Pretty much like I’d been getting no replies for the previous year of COVID.

Recently, I did a count of resumes / applications I’ve sent looking for a job. Over 2000 to date. Of that 2000+, about 10 companies were kind enough to reply, “Thanks but no thanks.”

The rest of them… Simply disappeared into the void.

November was quiet. Except for the endless bullshit in Washington DC. I was able to ignore some of it, but not all. We had a nice Thanksgiving. The dog really likes turkey!

Here we are in December, The insurance company and the remediation people are still having a tug of war with us in the middle. There are a couple of pieces of furniture that should be replaced but until they decide what, when, and how, I’m not going to take any action.

Winter arrived this week, snow and ice are on the ground and street. At this point I doubt any deliveries of new furniture pieces could be made. Ultimately it may work out for the best since it could mean less to move…

Due to this extended period of unemployment, my savings is dwindling to dangerously low levels.

I’m beyond ready to sell this house and move someplace warm.

So if I’ve seemed a bit edgier or distant than usual… Now, you know why.