Butt Toys

Yeah You read it, Yeah I said it.

[I’ve decided to write mini-reviews of items that catch my attention. Personally, I hate jumping in blind and spending $50 to $200 on a toy only to find out that it’s cheaply made, or simply don’t live up to expectations. So take my review in the spirit in which it’s meant. These are my experiences your mileage will probably vary.]

The male butt can be an amazing source of pleasure. I discovered this as an adolescent, but shame and social taboos kept me from really enjoying all that my butt could offer until well into middle age.

Many men, straight and otherwise have been introduced to the pleasures of anal stimulation by their significant others. I’ve known many women that loved “turning the tables” on their men.

Done right, someone stimulating your prostate can add a whole new dimension to sex and orgasm. You want a mind blowing orgasm? Have someone or something massaging your prostate when you cum. I guarantee that you’ll come back for more.

Whether you have a partner or not,  I can suggest a couple of fine toys.

My current favorites are the Aneros Progasm Ice and the Lelo “Billy”

The Progasm Ice is a great toy.

Having used the Aneros MGX for a while, I wanted something a little more interesting. I can heartily recommend the Ice.

One of the things I didn’t care for with the MGX was the perineum tab tended to be a little too sharp. Not like it cut or anything but it just dug into the perineum a little too aggressively for my tastes.

Dimg progasmice

The Progasm Ice is a different animal altogether

As you can see in the photo the front tab has a nice round ball and provides pressure and stimulation without digging in.

The Aneros toys are deceptive.

They look like nothing at all… yet, used properly these devices can take you to a hands free orgasm.

They’re powered by your own body. As your anal muscles contract, the Aneros presses on your prostate when causes another contraction and so on until you’re blissed out and cumming.

There are conflicting reports about health benefits of having your prostate massaged. Some people swear that prostate massage is essential for good prostate and sexual health. The medical profession seems less convinced.

Billy deep blue mv

I can tell you from my own experience, that prostate stimulation and massage just feels damn good.

Since I’m all about feeling good, as long as my prostate isn’t damaged by whatever is being done to it, I’m a happy man.

My other favorite toy for prostate massage is the  Lelo “Billy”

The “Billy” is pretty darn close to perfect if you’re into powered pleasure.

(I’d never seen a Lelo vibrator until I was shopping with someone very close to me who purchased one for his wife. I was impressed with the design and wondered if they made something for men… Short answer is Yes. )

DSC 1459

The curve is perfect and angles right at the prostate.

The diameter of the “Billy” is just right for beginners to butt play as well as the more… uh experienced user.

The controls are easy to use and the 5 programmed pulse modes combined with the variable speed of the unit make for a wide variety of pleasurable adventures.

This unit is well built, rechargeable, and a whole lot of fun. The “Billy” is a little pricy but looks like it’s going to hold up well.

I personally like the pulse mode. I have no doubt that everyone can find something to make their butt happy.

I’m thinking about giving one of these as a gift to my brother… Well Actually I think I’d have to give it to his wife… I’ll probably have to include 20 or 30 feet of rope so she could tie him down and force pleasure on him!

Combine either or both of these toys with a big healthy dose of Spunk Lube and you’re good to go for playtime either alone, or with your mate.

Spunk Lube has become my go to lube for general play. Whatever you’re sliding into your partner Spunk gives you a silky smooth ride. I’ve had no trouble with condoms or toys and as advertised Spunk cleans up easily.


The problem I suspect most folks have with toys, is the expense.

It’s not like you can walk into a store and try a toy to decide if you like it.

So you look at the item carefully and then you make the call. If you’re lucky the item in question works the way you hope.

I got lucky with these toys,

I hope my review helps you get lucky too.

 

The annual exams of this old carcass are almost done.

vitruvianOnly one more MD appointment and then I’m hopefully done for the year.

Dealing with the medical stuff as we get older is a royal pain in the ass. I’m not in poor health, but even now I find myself longing for the days when I needed Zero help from any physician.

My eyes aren’t what they once were. My sinuses are a mess, and the doctors are always hounding me about my diet, exercise and a litany of other age related concerns.

None of the things the Docs are mentioning are “In the RED” they’re just little things that seem to happen as we age. Of course the medical profession says “we have a medication for that”. I’ll be far more impressed when the medical profession says we can fix that problem for another 30 years!

Yeah, give me a drug or procedure that reverses the issue for 20 or 30 years and I’ll submit to it. I’m not one of those people that is going to willingly take a fist full of drugs 3 times a day. Besides the expense, the side effects are usually murder.

I can tell you this… I eat meat! I’m not going to stop eating meat and if that means that I don’t live quite as long so be it.

What’s the point of living a long life if it’s a life devoid of the little pleasures? I’d much rather be happy than ancient and sad.

Like most men, my preferred death would be to pass on during the most mind blowing orgasm of my life. I’d like to arrive at the gates of heaven roaring in pleasure,  semi hard, and dripping.

I like that image for no other reason than it would be fun freak out all the pious religious people who missed out on so much because they lived in terror of an afterlife of punishment.

I’ve got this twisted view that God shakes his finger at you for not enjoying the gift of life and the joys our bodies were built to have. What a waste if you didn’t enjoy everything the world had to offer.

I know that’s not the mainstream view but then again… I’m not and never have been mainstream.

I hope everyone has a great Fathers Day. Now go find some time to do what made you Fathers in the first place.

Why the hell is the gender of your sex partner so damn important?

It’s one of those things that I’ve been pondering lately.

It’s pretty much universal that all humans want to get off. We’re wired to seek out the neurological overload and subsequent endorphin release of an orgasm.

Most of us at some point in our early adolescence figure out;

a) That feels nice

b) That feels really nice!

c) OH MY GOD I’m dying… I’ve broken something… are these convulsions going to kill me? What will my mother say when she finds me like this?

d) Hmmm, I wonder if I can do that again!

Embracing

Then we’re all off and running. We’re trying to see what happens when we combine parts. When we do finally manage to combine our parts we find a whole new world of endorphin rush, and hopefully though not guaranteed, the comfort of loving human touch.

Some of us have funny memories about our first sexual encounter. Sadly some of us have memories of that first time being violent and wrong.

Most of us are clumsy, & awkward, the first few times, and yet somehow even in the “loss of innocence” there is a wonderful innocence in discovery.

Several times in my life I’ve been honored to have been asked questions by virgins of both genders. I’ve always said to these people;

Make a good and happy memory. It’s a memory that you will carry with you for the rest of your life and it’s worth taking the time to make it a good one.”

I’m also a believer in something Xavier Hollander said many years ago. “If you have to be high, or drunk to have sex… you’re not ready to have sex.

Thing is… In our humanness we all have common ground. Gender is secondary to humanness or so I’ve always believed.

I’ve personally had loads of sexual fun with both genders. I’ve been privileged to show more than one curious straight man what sex between men is like.

To me the willingness of the person and my emotional attachment to them is top priority, we’ll figure out how to make our parts fit and get off in the bedroom behind closed doors.

When we’re done we’ll both have smiles on our faces and hopefully be better friends…

Sometimes the intimacy is a simple touch, or listening. At the other end of the spectrum it’s the deep intimacy of sex. However giving pleasure and comfort in whatever form is really nothing more than an expression of how much you care about someone.

Isn’t that really what it’s supposed to be about?