Category: Racism is Alive and Well

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I be Free! Free At LAST!

racistseverywhere

Got the last bill from Verizon today.

Which is funny because they claim they bill a month in advance. When I cancelled the service the lady I was speaking with said sh thought I’d be getting a refund.

The young man I spoke to this morning said “We bill a month in advance, but because you cancelled service mid month you owe us.”

The way I understand those terms, I take it to mean that since I was on a fixed rate plan, my payment in Late Feb, would pay for March, and my Payment made in late March would pay for April.

When I mentioned to the young, obviously black man on the phone that I don’t think the terms they’re using mean what they think they do. He got just a little annoyed and told me I don’t understand English.

Verizon

It took all the power I could summon to not respond to that line with;

At least I speak the language without an accent that obviously identifies me as a minority, thereby inciting racist behavior

or I’m sorry my translator is broken what did you say?

or No, I don’t know what you’re sayin

or any of the 1000 other things I could have said that would have been construed as racist. Some of which would truly have been racist and meant as such.

baltimore

Instead, rather than Verizon calling me a racist again, I cut this guy off with, “So what I owe you is $60 and we’re freakin done is that correct? ”

It suddenly occurred to me that I was probably talking to Verizon in Missouri. Which is the place I was talking to when I was accused of being a racist. Since then I’ve given up trying not to be labeled a racist.

My speech patterns identify me as a white male as surely as the predominant African American speech patterns identify a black person.

Regardless of my intentions, or what is in my heart,  I will always be judged on the phone through whatever lens the person on the other end of the phone chooses to see the world through. Since I sound white, the black person assumes that I’m a racist and thus I am. There is no way that can be undone.

talktothehand

Rather than continuing a losing conversation it was easier for me to write a check and be done with Verizon. After all it’s not my freakin job to educate people who aren’t remotely interested in what I have to say.

Time to cut my losses and get on with life.

“Booolahmuwanaboola”

Sorry man, I didn’t understand what you were saying, I’d already turned off the translation matrix.

You were talking to THE HAND!

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OHHHH Hollywood’s in trouble now!

Al Sharpton

Al Sharpton is calling the Oscars on the red carpet for not falling all over themselves about Selma

Those racist bastards!

Surely the Oscar committee must have realized that a vote for films wouldn’t matter.

The ONLY correct answer these days is for black movies to sweep the Oscars.

I suppose Sharpton’s going to demand protests in the streets at his “emergency race meeting”.

Will Sharpton’s Oscar protestors be called #Hollywoodberacistnshit?

RACECARDREJECT

I find myself wondering when Sharpton is going to start talking about Jews in entertainment as the problem. Then which way will he go, McCarthy or Hitler?

“Are you now, or have you ever identified as Jewish or white?” OR “Da fix be ta put whitey in camps n shit, where dey be outta our way.”

Neither of which would be considered wrong because of a widely shared delusion that says people of color cannot be racist.

I have no doubt that Hollywood will twist themselves into Möbius strips trying to appease Sharpton and the other race baiters.

In an effort to help…

I recommend that we take all the Oscars from everyone for the past decade, then give them to ONLY black film-makers and actors. NO WHITES ALLOWED.<— Not racist because it’s only excluding white people.  If that doesn’t appease Sharpton, we can go back 50 years. It doesn’t matter, the awards are completely meaningless anyway.

The ultimate (dare I say, final) solution to Sharpton’s displeasure with Hollywood, is to have only black producers, actors, and movies. Perhaps President Obama can make that happen with an Executive Order. “It’s against the law for Whites to be in the entertainment industry,” or something similar? <— Not racist because again, it’s only excluding white people.

My snark is because I’m over the ginned up accusations of racism at every freaking turn. I’m sick of this delusion that ONLY black people can be victims. Its well past time for Sharpton to get out of the public eye, pay his taxes and SHUT UP!

I’d also be happy if we simply had no more idiotic award ceremonies… I’d probably dance a little jig.

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Here we are again.

The blank page mocks me.

I had been working on a piece about the Ferguson riots. I’ve decided that all of it has been said, I have nothing new to offer.

NicoleHe

I’ve been following the metamorphosis of the protests with interest. It’s been fascinating to see the “Call for Justice for Michael Brown” change into a generic indictment of racism in America, to specific finger pointing saying that White People are the problem with this country.

I’m amused that the protesters fail to see the irony in their calls for an end to racism while simultaneously screaming “Down with Whitey”

In the past six days I’ve seen some of the most racist comments I’ve ever seen. Oddly, those comments were leveled at white people typically by nonwhite people.

The exchange to the right is the most benign of the bunch. I had to point out that if Nicole He were a white man, She’d already have been fired from her job at Kickstarter.

This is representative of the double standard. I wonder if we can start a meme called #minorityprivilege or would that be racist?

This page still mocks me…