Blank Pages

There Blankpageyou are my nemesis.

You mock me with your blankness.

Is your blankness a reflection of what’s in my mind?

Featureless and smooth an ephemeral phantom of real paper.

You ghostly simulation of what once had form, texture, smell, and which would take my words by soaking up the ink with which I wrote them, forcing me to choose my words carefully and with purpose.

The smell of white-out permeated the room when I chose poorly, announcing to all that I had made a mistake.

You were my blank nemesis then too. But I could touch you, tear you, crumple you and discard you with satisfaction. Knowing that I had lost the battle of words but could still snatch victory from defeat by destroying you completely.

Your blankness now is nothing more than a dance of electrons through a backlit gel. My ink is composed of the same electrons and is just as fleeting. No-one knows of the errors, the poor word choices or indeed my identity at all unless I will it.

There is no satisfaction is deleting you, or turning off the device within which you abide.

You’re ever present silent mocking still confounds me each morning.

I fear that one day you will not be blank, that one day all my mistakes will somehow fill your blankness and then all will see the typos, poor word choices and run-on sentences that I’ve carefully expunged for years.

Apparently that day is not today.

There you appear in all your blank glory, patiently waiting for me to pen something…

Paraprosdokian Of the Week

A Friend sent me a list of these. I thought it would be fun to share them

Paraprosdokians are phrases or sentences that lead us down the garden path to an unexpected ending.

Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says, ‘In case of emergency, notify:’ I put ‘DOCTOR.’

Somewhere along the path I’ve lost an entire day

Don’t ask me… 

I have been thinking it was Wednesday all day. I think I lost Tuesday… but I’m not at all sure.

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Funny, I don’t recall an alien abduction.

Nor do I recall being asked to take anyone to my leader. However I’m still missing an entire day.

It’s possible that the day was deleted due to my updating a bunch of software on my computer. It’s not unusual to have my brain sucked out through my eyes and realize that a lot of time has gone by only when the need to eat or perform other bodily functions breaks me out of a computer induced stupor.

I remember that i’ve been proud about practicing on the guitar every day. I’ve worked on the book, I’ve searched for a job yet somehow something happened to an entire day of this week.

I can’t seem to place it. It’s a very disconcerting feeling.

If I was missing a day after today I’d understand it. I didn’t sleep very well at all last night so I’ve been a little slow all day. Bit for the most part up until last night.

Today has been weird too. Technology and I aren’t getting along.  I never have problems with technology… Well mostly never…

Maybe I’m still on an alien ship and they’ve got me in some kind of virtual reality.

Well, one can only hope if they’re extracting sperm… The Virtual Reality will include the fun part of that!

The truth of the matter is that I haven’t been following or reading much of the news. The Presidential candidates are embarrassing themselves AGAIN.

From what little I have heard someone doesn’t know how many states are in the United States, someone else doesn’t know anything about racial sensitivity, yet another person has suggested a budget similar to one of the others and both sides are slinging mud about that.

I guess it’s a little depressing. Our system of government is supposed to be a model of governance by and for the people. What it’s become is more like the campaign cycle of Iran. Or the old Soviet Union. “Vote for me or I hurt you and your family”

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Oh to be sure we haven’t gotten quite there yet. But I’m sure not going to be surprised when one of these candidates manages to get themselves appointed Emperor.

 

I’ve been busy but need to add more structure…

Today has been one of those days where I’ve been busy as heck sitting here at my computer and yet I don’t think I’ve gotten all that much done.

Well, it only seems that way.

In reality I’ve helped the Church Secretary reconnect one of the pastors computer to the main printer. So I was doing a little telephone support.

I put together a justification package for the Insurance lady who was having problems with the home office about me wanting to insure my laptop for almost 1.5 times the cost of the base unit. Well, I never buy a basic Mac. I’ve found over the years that If I buy top of the line, fully loaded right from the beginning I’m happier in the long run and I run the computer for 4 to 7 years. Depending on several  factors. Nevertheless, the insurance home office was asking questions. Frankly, I don’t blame them the disparity must have looked very strange at first glance.

Then I was off to post letters of recommendation to a site where I have applied for a job. Fingers crossed that these folks call me for an interview or even decide that I’m worthy of employment. Mind you I’m not holding my breath, the track record for California businesses calling me back after I’ve jumped through all their hoops is pretty bad.

On the other hand, I’m getting more and more calls from recruiters that want to know if I’m available for positions that are out of California. I’ve had more action on the job front from Colorado and Texas in the past 2 months than from California in the past year. There are 3 applications pending in Colorado now. 

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And at least the folks from out of state are polite. They return phone calls and ask intelligent questions. The best inquiry I’ve gotten recently from California is for a 6 month desktop support position in Santa Clara. While I’d love to spend some time working / living in the Bay Area, a 6 month contract position with no option to go perm 400 miles to the North just doesn’t cut it. I’d be living out of a hotel… cause that’s the only way that anything would make sense. Rent an apartments for 6 months? You’ve gotta plan for the worst and in this case the worst is you’ll be unemployed again in 6 months. So if you’ve gone to the trouble of renting a place moving your stuff, and you still have a mortgage on an unsold home in Southern California what are you supposed to do then?

Move back? Break your lease? Live in a Camp Ground? It doesn’t make a lot of sense. I suspect that a lot of people are in the same situation and they’re coming to the same conclusions. If I’m going to move 400 miles North… Why not move 400 miles due East to Phoenix? Or 250 miles Northeast to Las Vegas? Just heard of another former coworker doing exactly that. He & his wife put their house on the market and are headed to the North East. Maryland, Washington DC, someplace like that, considering they’ve both been in sunny Southern California for many years, I’m wondering just how that’s going to work out…

I mention all of this because the Indian recruiter from Sunnyvale seems to have a problem understanding the concept.

I’ve upgraded Microsoft Office, cleaned up my calendar (duplicate entries)

Re-read and will probably delete the last chunk of material I’ve written in the book, (I’m off on a tangent in the weeds… ) I sort of like what I was trying to do, but I think it’s too off topic and meanders too much.

What I haven’t done…

Practiced Guitar yet <– This will happen

Studied the Web coding techniques I’ve been trying to get to for a week

Written in the blog (Well thats happening right now)

Exercised (the Pups would love to go for walkies even if it is 90F) I don’t know if I’m ready to do that…

So I need to establish a schedule and then stick to it. That would add some of the structure that would maybe allow me to accomplish the tasks I’ve set before myself and maybe allow me to fit them all into the day.

Paraprosdokian Of The Week

A Friend sent me a list of these. I thought it would be fun to share them.

Paraprosdokians are phrases or sentences that lead us down the garden path to an unexpected ending.

You do not need a parachute to skydive.  You only need a parachute to skydive twice.