Month: March 2024

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Happy Easter

Last year around this time I was dealing with a lot. 

I’d come through Jerry’s death, the blizzard in Feb. and my brain being locked up with too many emotions to process.

Easter was always one of those holidays that Jerry worked really hard on. Not quite so much as Christmas, but it was an important day in his calendar. 

Easter was one of those days when he’d bring home flowers to brighten the house. He raided them from the flower arrangements at the church. His logic was that they were just going to wilt and die anyway, There was no reason they shouldn’t brighten up our house for a week.

He also would often bring home candy or chocolate rabbits. For my part, while he was playing the Easter Services I’d be here cooking, or preparing to cook a nice Sunday meal. We tried to make Sunday dinner important, Easter Sunday dinner was a little more special.

Last year I hardly noticed the day passing.

This year, I’m generally in a much better place mentally,  but I’m aware that there’ll be no flowers and candy. Somehow me being in a better mental state makes the day seem a little sharp? I know I’m not being “Easter minded” right now. I suspect this may be one of the last holidays to get through. 

I’ve managed to get through a whole calendar year, I forgot that there were holidays that slipped by me right after Jerry died so I didn’t really stop to think about them. This year I missed Jerry making corned beef on St Patricks Day. I missed a flower, or a plant on Valentines day.

I’ll miss the flowers from the Easter Arrangements adorning the table and I don’t feel much like making a big dinner. I’ve got more snow shoveling to do today anyway. 

This Easter is a contemplative one.

Perhaps, that’s the way it’s supposed to be.

Everyone, Have a good day.

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Even the dog is over it

Climate change my ass!

We’ve had weeks of spring, the dog is fully into the quarter’s shedding so his coat is thinning. He looked at the wet snow shifting between rain, hail, sleet, then back to snow.

He looked outside this morning at the accumulated snow then turned around & went back to bed.

This is super annoying! The snow is that wet heavy stuff that’s a pain to clear.

The back deck says it’s 35°F but still it’s snowing & sticking.

On the plus side, thus far it’s not the predicted 18”

On the down side it’s more than the revised prediction of 1”

Now, we’re just waiting for the snow to stop. I’m pretty sure that it’s only going to be myself and the young neighbor at the end of the street doing snow clearing. Everyone else had the good sense to get the hell out of Dodge.

We finally got breaks in snowfall around noon and spent the next 3 hours clearing. I think we got 7-9 inches of snow, which was more than enough. As I mentioned it was the wet heavy snow that is a pain to remove, but which must be removed before it freezes to the pavement.

When I say breaks, it was interesting, There were bands of snow, then periods of sunlight. The temp also started rising so working outside wasn’t to bad either.

Tomorrow there’s supposed to be more snow but the temperatures are supposed to be lower during the night, I’m hoping that means the snow will be light and fluffy.

Later in the week it’s going to be sunny and in the 60s. That’s going to make a really big mess. 

There’s one good thing about this. 

We haven’t had any idiot snow players.

Jesse being outside running around in the snow while I was out clearing the street tired him out he’s snoring on the couch right now while I negotiate with my my aching back about the next move I’m going to make. 

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Okay I’m really over this!

California retailers are responding to the insanity of legal thieving ($900).

Stealing is okay according to the morons in California’s legislature, as long as you don’t steal too much. (They should heed their own advice!)

California retailers are locking the damn doors, even though they’re open. So someone like me. You know, a decent law abiding person for whom stealing is the furthest thing from their mind, can’t just shop.

No, I have to ask permission to walk into some stores. I have to be buzzed in, or I have to be escorted while I’m in the store.

People don’t understand that when I’m shopping I’m moving. I’m not lingering over something unless it catches my eye. My mode of shopping annoys retailers who’ve had to open locked doors and give the super secret hand shake.

I’ll zip through a store in 5 minutes or less, if I don’t see something I like, I’m gone!

If we’ve gotten to the point that lawlessness is the rule, not the exception, we’ve got serious problems. Problems that might only be solved by gunfire.

Unfortunately if retailers are resorting to these tactics in my area (60 miles away from Los Angeles, 500 miles from Oakland and San Francisco, 100 miles north of San Diego), then in California at least, crime has apparently become the norm.

I remember being told in school that one major difference between America and Russia was that, in Russia there were lots of criminals and high crime. In America we had law and order, we could safely walk the streets.

40 some odd years later and i find myself asking is that still true?

I found myself enjoying that the Russians had found four of the assholes who shot up a music hall within 2 days. They didn’t give a shit about those pieces of filth. The Russians went ‘old school ‘to get information out of the criminals. One dude had his private parts wired up to some electrical device. Another had an eyeball fall out, (oops), a Third had an ear removed, the fourth was beat senseless and appeared for his arraignment unconscious.

Apparently, these criminals started singing like birds. So the Russians knew who to hunt down next.

The Russian people walk the streets of Moscow tonight safe. They get onto and off of subway trains that are clean. They walk through stations that are brightly lit, clean and beautiful.

We used to be the same.

If you’ve ever been to San Francisco, you may have seen BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit) Stations. There was a time 30 years or so ago when me going to the Bay Area meant riding BART. I loved it. The stations were all clean, the trains were clean, it was safe and I think many, if not all of the stations were unique works of art. it was a pleasure to use the system, and I looked forward to my visits.

San Francisco was a beautiful jewel of a city. It was safe. It was a walking town, and if you got tired there were always the Streetcars, MUNI busses, or BART. On a sunny day, walking the streets of the city was a joy. The color and vibrancy, the oddball businesses tucked into old buildings made every block a new discovery.

I wanted to live in San Francisco. I wanted to get rid of my car, use mass transit, live in a quirky old building, work in the city, and watch the sun set over the bay every night. Of every place I’d been, San Francisco was the first and only city I’ve ever fallen in love with.

The last time I was there was about 10 years ago. I felt unsafe from the moment I walked into the BART station from the airport. At every station, there were people who were obviously ill. Either from drug addiction or psychological impairment, they appeared to be homeless, living in the stations. It was necessary to run a gauntlet of mentally ill or “high” people just to get to a train.

The trains formerly, sparkling clean and comfortable, were filthy as were the stations. When the train I was riding entered the tunnel going under San Francisco Bay, I hoped that at least the tunnel maintenance had been done properly. That had never been a concern for me before.

That was the last time I was in San Francisco. Now in the post COVID era I have no desire to go back since it’s gotten so much worse. It’s heart breaking what has happened to what was a model of efficient transportation, and a spectacularly beautiful city itself.

Permissiveness, has destroyed or is destroying California. It has been eroding all aspects of the state for a very long time.

I’d really like to see police allowed to do whatever it takes to put a stop to crime. If that means nightsticks liberally applied, or saving the taxpayers money by putting down criminals with a bullet I’m good with it.

I suppose I’m saying, I no longer see criminals as humans. They rip through stores like locusts and I’m all for them being exterminated like locusts.

Probably a little harsh… I’m just really tired of accommodating criminal behavior.

Update: 3/29/2024

Well, I’m going to be looking for a new barber. The owner of the shop has decided that they need to charge 1/2 upfront for an appointment.

This was slightly annoying when I booked my every 4 week appointment. Then I thought about it.

My Barber said the upfront charge was because of excessive cancellations, without the individuals having the courtesy to call.

Okay, but… I’ve never missed an appointment, and the 1 time in a year that I needed to reschedule. I called to reschedule 2.5 weeks ahead of the appointment. In contrast, due to health issues my barber has rescheduled on me 2 or 3 times.

I really like my barber, but I really don’t like being punished for the “crimes” of other people. I understand that the shop has a problem with the appearance of preferential treatment so they have to treat everyone equally.

I on the other hand, can express my displeasure with this new policy by not making appointments in the future. This will likely mean I will take my trade elsewhere. Being able to walk in for a haircut isn’t something that works because as the only barber shop in town they’re pretty busy.

OR maybe they were busy. I honestly wonder what this new policy is going to do to the business.

I can say, they’re pricy. I’ve stuck with them for two reasons. 1) I like my barber. 2) I like to support local businesses.

I’ll not be making another appointment. Especially since perhaps Sports Clips will work out better for me. I can combine a less expensive hair cut with shopping for groceries, and puppy supplies.

This is just another example of how the breakdown of civil behavior, courtesy and professionalism, negatively affects us all.

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Good Golly, It’s almost April!

I’m losing time. It’s time for me to bite the bullet and get a massage. I don’t want to spend the money but having my lower back in spasm every other day is just not cutting it.

It’s not new damage it’s just spasms to the point of inflexibility. It’s also been taking the wind out of my sails when it comes to doing anything. I swear sometimes lifting a coffee cup is painful.

The last couple massage folks were nice, but I failed to make a connection with them. I’m not sure if that was because of them or me. Meaning I never let my guard down with them. The other issue is that I have to drive to LA or to Palm Springs and then drive back. Either option is a pain in the ass due to traffic and the general stupidity associated with traffic.

I’m going to have to do something soon. I’m tried of being in pain.

Speaking of pain…

I believe that I’ve finally collected up all the necessary tax documentation for the accountant. I’m not looking forward to dealing with the tax crap. I know it’s gotta be done, lest the unbridled raw power of the State and Federal governments be unleashed upon me.

I hate like hell, the thought that I’m going to have to write these fuckers a check. Why, when I’m unemployed, forced into retirement, and living on only what’s in the bank + SS should I give these morons what little I have so they can spend it like drunken sailors in Singapore?

One of those questions you’re never supposed to ask is, “What exactly do I get for my tax dollar?”

I’ve never been alone in asking that question. Regardless of the party in power, the people have always believed taxes were too high and the politicians have always found ways to spend beyond the available budget, then raise taxes to fund shitty pork filled bills.

Usually, the government, (State or Federal,) has failed spectacularly at performing their basic tasks. In the midst of failure, the politicians are asking for more money to fund non-essential tasks which they also fail at doing.

I’ve always believed that if a legislative body (State or Federal,) couldn’t pass a balanced budget, the entirety of the body should be flushed. I believe that would light a fire under their asses to do their damn job… If they wanted to keep their job.

There is no accountability, and no recourse. The feds talk about impeachment of this idiot or that idiot, they censure each other, they badmouth each other, but at the end of the day the same idiots are still sitting in their fancy offices, collecting their obscene paychecks, and doing nothing but growing fatter like a tick that’s found a sweet spot on a dog.

Yet, we all keep writing the checks. Or they keep deducting from our paychecks and we have no way to stop them. I’ve been feeling like we re-entered the, “Taxation without Representation,” phase for a long damn time.

Sure, we have elected representatives, but when they get to the state or federal capital they don’t represent the people that elected them anymore.

Instead, they represent themselves, and are willing to sell their grandmothers to a Chinese sweat shop for $5, and their sisters to a whore house on the Barbary coast for $2.

Hmm. maybe the whole tax thing and my back hurting have been why I feel so damn hopeless these days. I thought it was the endless bullshit over the upcoming presidential election.

That’s one of those things that I wish would just shut the hell up. Drop the damn bombs, kill us all, just fucking STOP. Biden, Trump, Al Sharpton, or the idiot brother of your second cousin who’s also your uncle.

I don’t fucking care who’s President anymore.

Absolutely NOTHING will change.

Hmm, I felt exactly the same at the end of the Obama Administration.

Disillusioned and hopeless, wondering if there was another country I could to move to, where I could enjoy a functioning government that wasn’t always in a state of chaos and scandal.

That may be a pipe dream.

Russia? At least there you know the rules.

I have to admit that I like their style when it comes to dealing with criminals, as exhibited by their handling of the terrorists that shot up the concert hall killing 140 people.

Cutting off ears, electrodes on testicles, beating the fuck out of a prisoner to the point his eye “falls” out of its socket?

Yeah!

If we had some of that kind of law enforcement here, I have to wonder if we’d have less crime, less corruption, maintained roads, and a generally peaceful society.

Hell I’d probably be more willing to pay my taxes too. At least then I’d be able to see what my “protection money” buys.

I wonder if we’d have problems at the border if we were known for fucking up lawbreakers?

As we hurdle on towards banana republic status, I suspect these questions will never be answered.

Just to be clear, over at least the past 24 years our government has been degrading. I don’t believe this degradation is party specific, it’s about lowering the bar, turning a blind eye toward crime, corruption, a “not my job” attitude on the part of elected officials, and government departments filled with unelected bureaucrats.

I wonder if Russia would allow an old fart like myself the opportunity to have a small house in the countryside with my dog for my last years.

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Happy Spring Equinox! (Well, technically it starts at 8:06PM PDT)

Well it’s been happy for me thus far.

I’ve been a bit under the weather since Sunday. Part of it I did to myself and because I’m a moron I doubled down on it.

I’d tweaked my back. So It was uncomfortable to stand, or sit for any length of time. That was bad enough and thankfully It’s much better today. But because I’d hurt my back I rushed through food preparation on Sunday night and well…

Let’s just say, “That passed violently and painfully.” It wasn’t quite as rough a night, as the colonoscopy prep but it was a close second. So between that, and my lower back spasming all Sunday night and well into Monday, I’ve been a little out of sorts.

Thankfully Jesse has been a wonderful companion and somehow understood that I was feeling terrible. He was gentle with me on Sunday during our customary long Sunday walk.

Sunday night, he turned himself into a furry heating pad against my back, while comforting me with licks and “head on my hand” in those times when my gut was twisting itself in directions it was never meant to twist. The “head on hand” thing is his way of saying “I’m here, you’re not alone.” He’s very independent so his signs of affection have to be on his terms. Him putting his head on my hand is special.

My back is still a little tweaked, but I woke up this morning appreciative that I felt so much better.

Tomorrow will be the first full day of spring so live it up!

I’ve been seeing signs of Spring for the past week or so. There are these plants with very small purple flowers that pop up this time of year. I noticed they were in bloom on Saturday. I’m waiting for the chocolate flower in the front bed to pop up. I noticed what looked like some green leaf tips, poking out of last years brown stems. Seeing those flowers always makes me smile.

I wish the forecasts would settle down a bit. One forecast says no rain for 10 days, the other says rain tomorrow. One forecast literally said no rain, while it was reporting a “Winter Storm” and telling me Rain would stop soon, even though it was snowing. 

I want to get Jesse to the groomer, but don’t want to spend the money only to have him playing in mud the next day.

I don’t know why I put any faith in the forecasts, they’re almost never right. But Climate Change is settled science. Uh huh… I’ll tell you what, start getting the daily or weekly forecasts right, then we’ll talk about climate change.

I know that’s unfair but I can’t help thinking it. Yes, Yes, Yes, all you Climate Change worshipers following Saint Greta, I know the immediate forecast and the climate change data are only loosely coupled. Yes, I know the one is talking about longer trends and is based on studies of weather beginning at the Industrial Revolution. 

I was being funny.

Please don’t send Greta to scold me for heresy.

After laying around yesterday, I’m trying to get my behind in gear to move on with stuff I have to do and that I’ve been procrastinating on. There’s a lot that needs to be done, much of which I haven’t even started. I’m not just talking about stuff from Sunday. It’s a lot more than that. 

My heart just hasn’t been into what I need to do. Probably because needing to do something and wanting to do something are two different things. You can need to do something but not do it. You can want to do something but not care if it’s done today, tomorrow or next week. For me both have to be aligned or stuff doesn’t get done, I’ll find distractions and excuses to avoid getting stuff done.

When I’m focused, need & want aligned… I’m unstoppable.

Need & Want haven’t been aligned very well for a while now. In the past few weeks or so, I’ve been feeling better, more focused, and less concerned about distractions. In some ways, I’m feeling more like my familiar old self than I have for a while. It feels like there’s something new coming too. I’m not sure what, I’m kinda curious though.