Day: June 3, 2011

I’m not a fashionista, Can’t recite show tunes, Cross-dressers make me uncomfortable (I’m polite but do my best to leave quickly. Hummm, It’s the same discomfort that I have around clowns. My therapist would’ve had a field say with that one!)

I don’t dance, I’m not looking for personal slights in every fucking publication, news broadcast, or sporting event. I couldn’t care less about the implications of faggot as a hateful word, I’m not impressed with pride parades,

In short I don’t now and frankly never have felt represented by the gay community in general.

In point of fact when purchasing certain items of a sexual nature I’ll spend my money with 1 or 2 “gay” businesses. The rest of my bucks go to more “mainstream” businesses. (That is an oxymoronic statement when I think about the items I’m purchasing.)

So while I do enjoy sleeping with another man, I do not identify with the “Glad hand, GAY”. My sleeping habits notwithstanding I’m first and foremost just a man.

Sexual partners, or sexual practices such as (BDSM) shouldn’t define us, no matter how much fun they are. Our humanity and how we interact with society defines us, all the rest is secondary.

I think that belief is why I don’t fit with the more familiar Gay community. Oh it’s not about self hate, or any of that psycho babble BS.

There are a lot of men like me. We’re there in some of the bars quietly sipping our drink and wondering if there is a place where more men like us are hanging out.

There aren’t. The closest I’ve found is one of the more renowned leather bars in the city. At least there I don’t have to worry about cross-dressers. The only issue I’ve had, has been with select members of  the “New Leather community” and those youngsters are easy to make go away.

I’ve also run across guys like me in local neighborhood bars. More often in bars that were gay than not, but we’re to be found in almost ANY local pub.

We’re usually gone by the time happy hour is over. We work day jobs. We may have someone waiting at home for us. So we stop in for a drink or two. As the really young crowd start rolling in, and the music gets turned up, we start taking off.

For the most part we just don’t connect with the “now” crowd.

On the other hand if it’s a matter of getting my dick sucked… or opening a sweet young thing for the first time.

Well at least I know which celebrity is involved in which scandal this week. So I’m able to be what they need me to be at for a few hours or until their mouths are full.

I said I didn’t connect… never said I was stupid. Obviously I’d prefer a man like me. You know, a dude with some experience and who’s been around the block a couple of times. I’ll take an experienced lover over an exuberant one anytime.

I’m not unhappy about not fitting in, in fact I think that being an individual is a lot more important and interesting than becoming a good little sheep. I do wish it was easier to find other men like me,  when I do find another guy like me It’s like a miracle.

A miracle that I appreciate with sweat, cum, and as much time as we can spend getting sweaty and unloading our balls.

Some people go to church…