I like sex. By that I mean I REALLY like sex.
What man doesn’t?
I like it with myself, while watching porn, with others, with groups, with one hot person, in short let me have sex. Let me be naked, let me be hard, let me CUM!!!
Lately though, I’m embarked on a new exploration.
This exploration has occured due to a discussion I was 
having with a friend and from reading his blogs.
For a long time Women have supposedly been able to become multi-orgasmic.
Rarely in the west has it been discussed as an option for men. But it is posible.
I was chatting with this friend and mentioned that I was in a sexual rut.
I’d been looking for something to break me out of a long period of the doldrums with regard to my own sexuality, but wasn’t having much luck. Even with innumerable meaningless assignations I’d enjoyed from time to time.
The problem with super casual sex is that one you’ve both cum, you’re pretty much done.
You all know that feeling. Get naked, lick, lick, lick, suck, suck, suck, groan, groan, groan, fuck, fuck, fuck, “Oh Baby, Oh Baby, Oh Baby” squirt, squirt, squirt, Clean up the cum, pull your jeans, shirt, & shoes on, say you’ll call and beat feet out the door.
You engaged in a purely physical process that is about as satisfying as blowing your nose. When you’re done you move on to the next thing without actually being present in the awesomeness of cumming.
I was looking for something a little more interesting.
My friend mentioned re-learning masturbation. “I thought dude… with all the practice I’ve had I’ve pretty much got that down!”
Oh come on… we all did it as boys and we STILL jeck off. I defy any of you out there to tell me as boys you didn’t work your dicks so hard and often you weren’t raw sometimes.
I personally believe that every Father should talk about masturbation with their sons and it would be very cool if they mentioned that they still did it even though they were married. God knows that would help to remove the guilt and shame.
My friend went on to explain… As boys when we submit to our lust and discover the pleasure that our cocks and balls can give us we learn to be furtive and fast in our masturbatory behavior. Part of this is due to embarassment, part due to religious guilt and part due to the societal messages we get as we’re growing up.
Who hasn’t heard “it will make you go blind”, “you’ll grow hair on your palms”, “Jesus cries when you touch yourself”. (That one is really sick! Jesus was a dude, he’d be crying if you didn’t experience the joy our bodies can bring us.) In any case because of all of these things, we develop patterns of masturbation the change little as we get older.
As young men in my personal experience, we get into the mind set “Get it as much and as often as we can” and even in relationships we never really change the behavior.
I think I fell into that category simply because many of my early sexual partners treated sex as some kind of reward for putting up with their stupid shit. (Sweetheart, your hole ain’t quite as golden as you think it is and would it kill you to wash it?)
My first clue should have been that they were using sex as a golden carrot and my second clue should have been that I thought most of the stuff my partners were concerned about was plain stupid. Well live and learn!!!!
As a result I found myself figuring “when I get the chance to fuck, or be sucked I’m going to go as many times as I can”. I was a crazy person and a lot of that sex was really hollow for a wide variety of reasons.
Hell, I’ve been involved in orgies where the object wasn’t necessarily to enjoy yourself but to see if you could cum more and faster than other guys in the room. (As an aside… I’ve won some of those competitions!) In retrospect, I wish that I’d been more in tune with enjoying the moment rather than the competition.
Needless to say unless you grow up, adapt, and learn to slow down, savor, and enjoy the time you’re not going to be all that fulfilled sexually. Which is EXACTLY where I found myself.
What kind of sick bastard finds himself flogging the hell out of a lovely sub and is BORED?
Hi There! Sick bastard here!
Thankfully, I’m not too far gone. In that example the chemistry just wasn’t right for either of us. But performance art is art nonetheless (Another story for another time)
I’ve digressed, a bit.
The simplest explanation of the multi-orgasmic practice is that just before the point that you actually blow your load, you’ve actually begun to orgasm.
This is a technique for hanging in that place and learning to extend the time you stay in the orgasm phase without moving on to the ejaculation phase.
As a part of the practice you develop a realization that you have the choice to blow your load or not. It’s an interesting learning exercise. I can see the potential and I like that there are options I couldn’t see before.
The practice time is a lot of fun too!
I need a lot of practice!
As I get further into this I’ll write more about what I’m experiencing. In the mean time you can check out The Multi–Orgasmic Man: Sexual Secrets Every Man Should Know. It’s available from most booksellers.