Can we all agree this is out of hand?

There are scattered reports of businesses and even homeowners boarding up their windows and closing or planning to close on election day and perhaps for days or weeks after. 

Never in my life and thankfully it’s been a long one, have I seen this kind of behavior. I remember antiwar riots during the Vietnam war but nothing like we’re seeing today.

This is a standard election year, this happens every four years and all of us are supposed to get a say in the direction of our nation.

This is supposed to be a respectful process. Let the politicians sling the mud, We The People, are supposed to be better than them. After all, our elders used to say the only thing politicians had in common was their corruption.

Yet that is not what we’re seeing. We’re seeing what amounts to a series of childish temper tantrums played out on the streets of cities around the nation.

Thanks and credit to GettyimagesACTUP, an organization that appeared during the AIDS crisis wasn’t as violent and there were literally thousands of people dying in hospitals around the nation. (I Know… I was there.)

Visiting an AIDS patient was done with full biohazard protection. I’m personally all too familiar with dressing in white disposable “Bunny Suits” with gloves, mask and eye protection. There were some hospitals where the staff was in self contained pressurized suits because physicians had no idea what was killing gay men, but they knew it was contagious and communicable.

ACT UP 1489405375Let me tell you, those were ugly, lonely deaths. ACTUP had plenty of reason to scream, riot, and raise hell.

Those deaths were in fact generally being ignored by the media, and the government, and everyone else. Because they were deaths occurring in a marginalized segment of society. A group of people who could and did have their rights regularly suspended because of the love that dare not speak its name.

Yes, Black Lives Matter, ALL LIVES MATTER.

080213_Westboro_Baptist.jpgDuring the AIDS crisis there wasn’t any separation between black, white, hispanic, or asian gay men.

They were all dying and the gay community, the real gay community, stood up and raised hell. Eventually the gay community was joined by other people who realized that standing up for what was right, outweighed being stigmatized.

And in the midst of that, The Westboro Baptist Church was holding signs outside hospitals, protesting at ACTUP rallies, or protesting funerals, spouting hate filled speech, (as is their right), things like God hates fags, AIDS is God’s retribution, all FAGS burn in hell, better dead than a FAG.

185ay4jt8tqiwjpg.jpgMy Mother and I were even accosted by members of Westboro, going up the steps to a concert hall where one of the Gay Mens Choruses were performing.

My first reaction to these people’s hate filled vitriol was to punch their teeth out of their heads in anger and defense of my dear old mom.

It was she, that stayed my hand. “Son,” she said loudly, “these people, no matter how cruel, misguided, inbred, or stupid, have the right to be assholes where ever they choose. We have to defend their right to be morons or risk losing our rights too.”

Westboro-Baptist-Church-protests.jpgWe enjoyed the concert.

What the hell happened to that philosophy? How is it that in 30 years we’ve gone from understanding people have the right to their opinions, (no matter how contrary to our own,) to a culture where people who don’t agree with you must be silenced unequivocally?westboro.jpg

While looking up Westboro, I honestly didn’t know if they were still around since Fred Phelps died. I noticed that not only are their current signs still largely about FAGS but a lot of their signs now relfect a general hatred of America. They also seem to hate Trump which begs the question of why, or if, they’re not naturally aligned with ANTIFA or the radical Islamic elements.

They don’t like Jews, and many of their signs appear to be thankful of the maiming and killing of American soldiers.

It’s likely they’re not going to be aligned with BLM since they may just be flat out racists too, perhaps the racist thing is the reason they’re not marching with Islamic terrorists.

I find it interesting that they are not censored in searches, their hatred is on full display with no content warnings. At  the same time conservative and GOP voices while far less hateful are being censored.

I guess this means that there are acceptable kinds of hatred, or hate speech. 

Today, membership in ACTUP means you are by definition apparently against Trump. There was a time when politically ACTUP was against anybody that refused to take action in the AIDS crisis. The organization was fairly nonpartisan. Now it seems that they’re firmly Democrat.

Protests, Riots, Looting, Ever consider the police?

Dr KingProtests are people speaking out to demand redress of grievances.

A protest is folks holding signs, marching, demanding to be heard.

Dr. Martin Luther King showed us how to protest. He did it very well. Yes there were scuffles and even some riots but these were fairly contained. Civil Rights protests were demanding equality. A totally justified and reasonable demand.

Protests demanding accountability of Police Officers are also legitimate. I think that “Bad” cops should be punished and they shouldn’t be cops.

Growing up in the time and place that I did. The police were neighbors, family friends, and trusted to be the person you could get help from.

As a child, if I got lost, I looked for a blue uniform. I knew they’d help me find my parents and even knew that I could get a ride home from an officer if I was hurt. (As happened after a particularly nasty tumble on my bicycle.)

That’s the role i think most police officers would prefer to have. The role of trusted protector. And yes, there are some officers that become officers for the wrong reasons. Just as there are some doctors who become doctors for money, not to help their patients.

A riot is a protest gone wrong. Riots can be spontaneous and often appear to be an upwelling of rage that finding no other outlet leads to destruction.

As a youngster, I remember riots on the national news. I remember seeing broken windows, and damaged police cars. I remember seeing the perpetrators of the damage being hustled into police vans and being told by my elders that those people were going to jail not for protesting, but for rioting and looting.

There was a line, and those few people crossed that line. It was an easy logic. Free Speech and Freedom to Assemble were protected rights. Rioting, looting and wanton destruction were crimes and would be punished as such.

The role of the police in protest situations was to make sure there was some order and to protect the protesters. Even if the police didn’t agree with the beliefs of those protesters.

What we’ve seen over the past few days has generally been that same stance. In this case, I think the police are in a tougher situation.

I’d bet that the vast majority of the police agree with the protesters marching against police brutality and many of the officers may even be feeling shame that one of their own was so blatantly brutal.

Equally, I’d bet that officers are facing intense internal conflicts. On the one hand during the day they’re providing support to the legitimate protesters. But at night, everything changes.

Imagine briefly, what being an officer on the line might be like.

DerekChauvinYou’re ashamed of what you saw. You know that officer Chauvin was wrong.

You know that the other officers present were wrong in that they saw something that shouldn’t have been happening and they chose not to act.LA1

Even worse, there were people standing there filming the whole thing.

Those people could have stepped in too. They should have stepped in.

They could have made a difference when it counted, they could have saved a life.

But they didn’t. The question you ask yourself is why?

Those people knew what was happening was wrong. The knew it in their heart and yet were so involved in filming they did nothing. It’s obvious something was wrong with Chauvin, What the hell was wrong with those other people?

MN2And then you have to go out to protect the protesters who are rightfully angry, and you’re angry about the same thing for the same reasons.

The difference is you’re being pelted with bottles, and rocks, and spat upon, threatened, and called names.

You’re unable to speak out or to be heard when you say you’re as angry as they are. Even if you spoke out, you wouldn’t be heard because the protesters see you as the enemy.

MN1As an officer, you know that Derek Chauvin is being investigated and will face justice.

You also know that justice isn’t instant. You know that all the details will have to be investigated, written down, and the specifics of the entire event must be written formally for the court to try the case.

The reason there are laws is so that we don’t have “Frontier Justice”, As a good officer, you know that lynchings don’t lead to a stable society, they lead to anarchy.

You’re tired, you’ve been catching an hour of sleep here and there and you dread sundown.

At sundown you know that the legitimate protesters will go home, they’ll have dinner, and talk about the good work their protest did to bring attention to the problem.

You’ll still be on the line.

You’ll see the movements of the protesters for whom marching and chanting isn’t enough.

You’re there when twilight falls. The fist embers of fires blossom. Bottles shatter around you, thrown from the gathering dark. Rocks hit you, again from the dark. Nearby firecrackers sound, are they a prank, or cover for gunshots?

You check your colleagues, everyone is still standing, you exhale a sigh of relief.

The crashing of glass sounds down the block, a brick lands at your feet thrown from the top of a building. More fires, more windows breaking, you can see looters running in and out of the shops.

There are a lot of people dropping items as they run away. Your group is ordered to move forward to protect the businesses and as you start moving, more bricks, rocks, and bottles rain down in your path.

You smell gasoline in front of you, it registers that Molotov cocktails are being thrown at you.

Twilight gives way to night. Laughter and excited shouts echo from the darkened alleyways. You keep moving forward to the looters.

LootingYou know, by the time you get there, the shops will be empty, trashed, and the police will be blamed for failing to protect these businesses.

You tell yourself it’s not your fault but you feel that somehow it is.

Buildings burning in the distance now. You hear that the firefighters aren’t coming because the area isn’t secure. The buildings will continue to burn and the losses to local business owners will continue to rack up.

Finally the order comes from on high that you can fire teargas to herd the looters out of the area. Large fireworks go off in front of you. Some of your colleagues fire teargas in response.

You think, “large fireworks are essentially bombs, without the shrapnel,” as another concussion wave compresses your chest.

Other officers are firing rubber bullets in the direction that last firework came from.

This is no longer a protest, or even a riot. This is now an urban battlefield and you can’t really defend yourself as if it was Fallujah. You’re essentially unarmed.

One of your friends goes down, stumbling from a brick to the head. You stop to help them up and start scanning for the source, you see a target and fire your rubber bullets but aren’t sure that’s even the person throwing the bricks.

You think of your children and are grateful to know they’re safe. A large rock hits your helmet, followed by bottles from multiple directions. You stumble, hear laughter and taunting.

A woman comes out of the darkness screaming obscenities and spitting at you. She runs away into the dark.

“It’s not worth it,” you think. “I don’t want to do this anymore, not here.”

The night continues, in a wash, rinse, repeat, cycle of violence. Dawn reveals a scene of destruction. A testament to failure.

You tell yourself you didn’t fail, the system failed, the citizens failed, the elected officials failed, but you still feel like you personally failed.

Looking out the window of the squad car on the way back to the station you come to a decision. Typing up your report for the night you take a break and call home.

“Honey, I’m done. Call the Realtor and start packing. I’ve been at this for five years and I’ve not made any difference at all. Lets leave this city, let it burn. I don’t care anymore. If I’d wanted to be fighting urban war, I’d have stayed in the Marines. At least there I could adequately defend myself. ”

Your spouse says you’re just tired. They’re right, you are, but the tiredness you feel isn’t due to the past four days.

It’s a tiredness of the soul, a tiredness that comes from pointlessness, there will always be poor people, there will always be bad people, there will always be shitty politicians, and nothing you do will change that.

It’s pointless to keep trying because the people you help, forget in a second that you helped them. Those people will, based on the latest Twitter, News, or Facebook post, turn on you without a moment’s thought.

You turn in your report, then head to the Captain’s office to hand in your resignation. Unsurprisingly, you’re not the first one to hand in your badge, there are many others on his desk. The Captain accepts the document, your badge, and service weapon.

“I don’t suppose there’s any point in talking about this,” he asks.

You shake your head, “No”

“I can’t blame you, I’m working on my resignation too. I’ve got my twenty in. What are you planning to do?”

You shrug, “Anything, anywhere, but here.”

The Captain nods, stands, extending his hand, “It’s been a pleasure working with you. Good luck.”

“Thank you sir,” You turn and leave the office. At the door is a rookie. He’s got that same hollowed out look that you wear. He’s carrying a letter too…

Governor Newsom – I don’t think you’ve realized this, but Lockdown is over!

Screen Shot 2020 05 11 at 4 05 01 PMI know, I know, you think your orders are still being obeyed. But have you been outside lately?

Have you been on the road? 

See those little red lines? Those are traffic jams. Looks like the prisoners are making a break for it. 

Maybe you need to bring in the national guard to maintain your orders… 

I was just at Lowes. Guess what? The parking lot is full. So are a lot of other parking lots, and oh, by the way there’s a lot of traffic on the roads even out in the boondocks where I live. 

Your control is slipping. You’re going to have to make sure cops in riot gear are standing by and make sure they have real bullets. After all you want people to die right? You want people fearfully cowering in their homes don’t ya?

You can chalk bullet ridden corpses up to Covid-19 can’t you? After all, if you’re outside your home, “The Covid gonna get ya,” one way or another isn’t it? 

Governor, it’s time you opened the state. We’ve all done our time. The curve is flattened, how about something new? Maybe we need to get on with living and maybe if we’re smart about it we’ll all be just fine.

You want to do something actually constructive? How about mandating paid time off if someone has the flu or Covid-19. How about simply making it easy and the responsible thing for an employer to tell their employees “If you’re sick… STAY Home. You’ll get paid.”

Open the damn beaches and parks again. Bored, frustrated, scared, people is a recipe for disaster. Based on the driving I just saw. Folks are well past their boiling point.

Just a thought you’ll ignore, from someone who doesn’t matter at all.