Tag: General

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I made it through another anniversary

Two years ago last night, Jerry died. So did a big piece of my heart. Oh, he was a pain in my ass, I suppose I was a pain in his as well. I guess that’s part of relationships. We loved each other and I miss him.

I was a little emotional through the day. I walked the dog, finished de-christmassing the house, made dinner, poured myself a drink and listened to music. I went to bed about the normal time and slept soundly. I do remember some fragments of dreams but nothing coherent.

I didn’t drink to excess. I woke up more or less in a decent mood. 

I haven’t gotten anything much done today. I played on X too damn much. I’m willing to forgive myself for that.

I need to settle down, and to apply for a bunch of jobs. I doubt that I’ll get much if any response. But I feel like I have to try.

As I said, the Christmas tree and associated decorations are all put away. I was able to dispose of a box through consolidation. Going through the decorations was bittersweet.

I have sweet memories of the Christmases Jerry & I spent together.

Each ornament is special and since many of them were saved from the house fire in 2008 there is a greater significance to each.

The house is clean, (except the office,) the amount of stuff remaining to be tossed feels never-ending but I know I’m making progress.

The living, dining, kitchen, and master bedroom are less cluttered. They could all use more de-cluttering but these areas are lighter and more airy. I like it this way.

There is still much to do, and much to get rid of, but where I’m at and the direction I’m moving feels right and good.

The point is, this year while a bit rocky was better than last year. I’m better now and while I still miss him, it’s not the kind of pain it was. I’m stronger and somewhat optimistic.

Perhaps I’m trending toward happy?

 

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Fire & Ice

I woke up to 6” of unexpected snow yesterday morning. I’d been worrying about the wind and red flag fire warnings.

My day was consumed with snow removal and I’ve been taking down Christmas decorations. 

I’m taking this opportunity to repack and consolidate the decorations into fewer boxes and a bit better organization. I’m aiming for certain types of decorations and supplies being in clearly marked boxes. You know, Hallmark battery powered ornaments in one box. Keepsake ornaments in another box. Replacement lights, power cords, and those kinds of accessories in another box. Organization makes decoration a lot easier and pleasurable.

By the end of day yesterday, the Palisades fire erupted. Followed by additional wildfires across LA County.

Santa Ana winds are whipping through the canyons with hurricane gusts. That means that embers are flying and the potential for spot fires is very high.

For the time being, the winds are blowing mostly offshore, which means that the wind is blowing the fires away from me and the abundant fuel in the foothills and forests.

Where I am, the winds are very calm just breezes really.

On the other side of the mountain that is not the case. I’m watching the fires in Altadena and Sylmar very carefully. If the wind were to shift, and that fire started burning to the North, What happened with the Bridge fire could happen again only worse this time.

The Altadena fire is burning near where the Bridge fire began in Sept. For a time in Sept, I thought our whole little town was going to be wiped out.

The Calfire people were amazing and the town was saved with only a few buildings lost.

Santa Ana winds are whipping through the canyons with hurricane gusts. That means that embers are flying and the potential for spot fires is very high.

Aircraft are grounded due to the winds.

I’m betting that the property losses are going to be astronomical.

I feel so sorry for people who’ve lost their homes. I know what that feels like.

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Good Golly!

The beat goes on.

The insane beat that is. New Orleans, Las Vegas, A New York subway where a woman is burned to death and a) nobody helped. b) the lady appeared to just stand there. Fog that people claim isn’t fog, unknown drones in the New Jersey sky.

New flu, Bill Gates still researching mosquitoes that can vaccinate, reports of people in hospitals given Covid vaccine without their consent while under anesthesia, reports of some kind of mRNA vaccine that is airborne & uses humans as a transmission vector, mask requirements are back in some places, some kind of weird respiratory affliction that is causing low level discomfort.

People looking up and noticing, apparently for the first time that planes sometime leave condensation in their wake. Although there are other bits of information that suggest this isn’t condensation but is instead some kind of chemical.

This is just a small sampling of the buzz on X.

At the rate conspiracy theories have been proving true lately, I’m not counting anything out. I’m a skeptic but I am starting to wonder.

Even the actual facts don’t make sense. One guy drives through a crowd for no apparent reason then gets out of his rented vehicle and starts shooting? Why?

Another guy rents a cybertruck, of all things, drives from Colorado to Las Vegas stops to recharge 8 times, taking the long way from point a to point b. Then shoots himself, and blows up the truck in front of a Trump hotel. Oh and the guy is ex military, and knows how to make a bomb big enough to have taken the front of the hotel off, instead, the explosion is confined mostly to the cybertruck and does only minimal damage to the hotel.

Then we find that the fire was hot enough to burn the body beyond recognition, & melt some of the weapons he was carrying, but that his plastic military ID and the data storage in his phone somehow survived?

An odd coincidence is that the vehicles in both cases were rented via Temu. I never heard of Temu before. My Sick side wonders if this was some perverse publicity stunt to get Temu on the map so to speak.

None of this makes sense and looks like people are just randomly losing their minds. Don’t even look at the way people behave on planes anymore.

We’re not even 5 days into the new year. It looks like this is going to be an interesting year.

There are those who claim that the world government, (whatever that is,) wants to kill us all and that our own government is complicit in this dastardly plan.

I’m not sure.

I’ve been contemplating the assertion that the “World Elite Government” wants us dead. If I accept that as true then I ask why? It doesn’t serve their purpose. Without the peons who will grow their food, harvest it, cook it, and be a slave to them catering to their every whim?

How will they keep the lights on, stay warm and comfortable in their mountain or beachfront villas? There is a singular truth proven time and again. Those at the very top of our society have very few real world practical skills. Without an underclass with knowhow they’ll be dead as soon as the food or fuel runs out.

How will they remain wealthy without tax revenues rolling in? There has to be a logic to wanting to kill everyone off. Remaining one of the comfortable elite becomes far more difficult without a population to oppress and control.

Alternatively, there have been rumors about some kind of UFO disclosure. I find myself wondering if the “World Elite Government” isn’t intending to actually kill us off. What would happen if an alien species had made a deal with the elites for food? What if all the chemicals and drugs aren’t to kill us, but are instead some kind of marinade? Like the old Twilight Zone episode To Serve Man.

I’d consider moving to another country. But it’s just as insane elsewhere as it is in America.

Honestly if I could afford it, I think I’d like to live in Norway Iceland, Greenland, or Sweden. Just a little cabin along a fjord. Some fields, maybe raising goats or sheep. A short ride to a smallish village and generally being left the hell alone.

An island, a forest, or practically anywhere would serve just as well as long as I didn’t have to deal with the nuttiness.

Hmm… Suddenly, I can see the appeal of the elites wanting to reduce the population…

I’ve always suspected Thanos from the Marvel Comics wasn’t far off base. He was morally ambiguous, but cutting 1/2 the population of the universe would insure enough resources for everyone.

Here on earth, one might accept that plagues like the Black Death, and Spanish Flu of 1918 were failsafes. A sort of natural population control. You might even view COVID as a failed human attempt at triggering a “culling”.

I’m turning off the news, and ignoring the communication systems for the next few days. This train of thought is dark and even though I feel better than I have for about a week. I don’t need any help finding myself on the path to a dark depression.

Have a great weekend. Fingers crossed nothing else crazy happens.