Tag: Friendship

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Okay, Not how I planed to spend this week.

As I’m sure you’ve heard by now, there are multiple fires burning in Southern California.

Tuesday afternoon I got an evacuation notice on my phone. Then, there was a helicopter flying overhead announcing mandatory evacuation. Then there was another evacuation notice on my phone, and finally there was the sheriffs department driving up & down the streets announcing evacuation on their loudspeakers.

Hmm, says I, they must want us to leave.

I suspected it was coming and I’d already planned to stage stuff in the event there was an evacuation. I didn’t get a chance to execute my cunning plan before the evacuation was upon me.

So I grabbed some stuff, put the dog in the car and away we went. 

By the time we left the house, it looked very much like somehow the neighborhood had been relocated to Mars on a very bad day.

Jesse was freaked out and would not settle down.

I was annoyed by that and of course the usual California driving skills or more properly lack thereof.

I made a brief stop, or what was supposed to be a brief stop at a storage locker where I unloaded a bunch of stuff in an attempt to give the dog more room to lie down & relax. This as it turns out was an error.

While I was able to offload, I wasn’t able to get back on the damn freeway. Either the exits were closed, or they were blocked by the aforementioned Excellent California Drivers. Many of whom wouldn’t allow a change of lanes. At least one of whom used the emergency lane to “get ahead” and forced me out of the lane so I was unable to get on the freeway safely. 

Mind you by this point we were 15 – 20 miles away from the evacuation zone and in no danger whatsoever. This was just normal California assholery. It is also the kind of behavior that begets freeway shootings.

I figured “Screw it” and stopped for gas. Then I found a whole string of entrance ramps blocked off forcing me to take surface streets parallel to the freeway until just before Pomona.

Once on the freeway it was a simple matter to get to Orange County and stay with some friends. It’s good to have great friends that will put you up in a pinch. It’s even better to have friends that will put you and your big ass dog up when they have a lovely pet free home and it is pet free for a reason.

My friends have gone above and beyond in this instance and I truly have no idea how to thank them.

At this point I know the firefighters are doing all they can do. I know that there’re no guarantees but I hate not knowing what is likely to happen. Is my house going to burn? Is it not? If it burns, then I have a clear direction. If it’s not going to burn, I’d really rather be home and not imposing on my friends like this.

In an attempt to minimize the mess and stuff that a dog invariably brings into your life, I had Jesse groomed today, while I was at it I had my car washed and my hair cut too. My hope with Jesse being groomed was that he’d shed a little less and wouldn’t be in any way offensive in terms of dog stink.

He’s been sleeping since we got back and I know I’m going to have to take him out on at least one, maybe two more walks tonight.

I don’t really think about it, but having a fenced in back yard is super nice. Their yard is not fenced in, so I’ve been walking Jesse on his leash a lot. Normally Jesse & I go for our morning walk, then I leave the sliders open so he comes and goes as he wishes the rest of the day.

If I move off the mountain, either because of the house burning down, or just because It’s time for me to move on, I will be looking for new digs that have a fenced in back yard after this experience, I’ve decided that is a must have.

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Jesse got to ride in the nice car yesterday…

I get to spend some time cleaning the nice car today.

Jesse had a Vet appointment yesterday. I hadn’t really thought about the fact that it had been a while since I last drove the station wagon and we’d had a cold snap.

OOOppps. The combination, and I suspect the age of the battery in that vehicle combined to “Surprise!” Make the car not start.

Goody!

I thought about using the nice car to jumpstart the wagon but If I’m going to have to pull the nice car out of the garage grab jumper cables start the wagon, then put the nice car back in the garage, get the dog loaded in the wagon, and do all that in less than 5 minutes so I can make the appointment. 

Too much stress!!!!

Ah well, Jesse was going to be riding in the nice car sooner or later. I flip down the rear seats, toss a blanket on top of the  platform and load him up. 

He was mostly good. As usual, he wouldn’t settle down and kept pacing like he couldn’t get comfortable. Coming back from the Vet, I tried having the rear seats in their normal position. In a way that might have been better because Jesse tried to curl up and lay down. Something kept him from staying curled up or getting comfortable for more than a minute or two.

It might have been the stop & go traffic or just that he was too spun up from the excitement of going somewhere.

I suspect, that if we were on a long freeway trip he’d find a way to curl up. Lately as long as he can see me he seems to be content.

We had an incident last Friday with another dog that was totally out of control whose owner had zero control over. As is always typical in these situations, the idiot owner was letting their dog run free off leash. Great!!!! 

Their dog really came after Jesse and I both. To his credit, Jesse kept himself between the aggressive dog and me. Jesse’s attitude toward me changed on Friday. I’d had enough of this aggressive dog biting and snapping at both Jesse and I and got aggressive back. I made a sound Jesse has only heard once or twice, on those occasions it was directed at him because he was out of control. This time he looked up at me and realized I wasn’t angry with him, I was fixated on the other dog and when I moved toward the other dog Jesse moved with me.

It only took him a moment to connect the dots he and I were going to fight this dog together. The dog’s owner finally got their fat ass to where Jesse & I were making a stand and her dog ran off up the street, the minute she reached for its collar.

She offered a lame weak “sorry” to which I bellowed “Sorry my ass! Your dog attacked us, it went out of its way to follow us and was waiting for any opportunity to bite one of both of us.” I was very mad about it. We were less than 300 yards from our house. Jesse picked up on my being pissed off. He checked to see if I was angry with him and when he figured out I was yelling at the lady, (another human,) it seemed to give him pause.

At this point her dog ran in front of a delivery truck narrowly missing being hit and causing the delivery truck to lock up the brakes on a downhill run. 

Jesse & I continued our walk. I needed to clear my head, and perhaps so did Jesse. On the walk, I noticed Jesse was sticking much closer to me than usual. Every subsequent walk since, Jesse hasn’t been pulling on the leash or trying to drag me up or down the mountain. He’s been paying more attention to where I am versus where he is and we’ve been waiting on each other. He’ll wait for me to navigate rough terrain and he’s not dragging me into the underbrush but I’ll wait on the trail for him to investigate intriguing smells in the underbrush. 

Somehow the whole incident on Friday changed the dynamic between us.

That change in dynamic also carried over to the Vet visit.

He was more obedient and relaxed. Oh he didn’t like being there and really hates waiting for anything but he was more mellow. He got on the scale with no production then sat when I asked him to, 69 pounds! He laid down next to me in the waiting room and was mostly obedient even when he heard the kitten in a cat carrier and really wanted to know what that thing was. He was good with the Vet, & the Assistants. I was super impressed. The only thing that was annoying was him doing this high pitched whine that he does when he’s anxious or not getting his way. 

People in the waiting room were laughing when I was talking to him. “Jesse stop that whining. Look you can talk about it all you want but the whining is really annoying.” For some reason he chose that moment to “Talk” and it was like he was back talking me. We became the entertainment in the waiting room.

He’s got a clean bill of health. I’ve got the documentation that he’s had his boosters, so now I can take him to the groomer.

When we got home he was tired, I also noticed his head seemed a little warmer than usual. I think the booster they gave him may have made him feel a little punky. He napped the rest of the afternoon and wasn’t interested in his usual sunset ritual. He tends to want to be outside on the deck to watch the sun set and I guess he’s keeping an eye on the critters.

Last night he was curled up on the couch next to me with his head on my thigh. He wasn’t interested in rope, or ball, or anything other than my scratching his ears every once & and while.

Even this morning, he’s not fully himself but I can see him improving since we’ve gotten out of bed.

I know, too much information about the dog.

You know what? The Dog is way more interesting than the Washington D.C. follies!

Have a great day!

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It’s been a weird busy week.

Not that I’m complaining about it. 

The week has been a weird one. It’s the one year anniversary of Jerry’s death. I was feeling it a little, but nothing unexpected, and in a way, now that I’ve been through a whole year there’s a sense of relief.

Part of it is distance from him having died and part of it is that now that I’ve been through all the holidays and special days I’m somewhat relieved and confident about having survived. Oh sure I was a little melancholy and nostalgic…

I’m still standing.

Monday into Tuesday

I was struck by the memory that on those dates it was the beginning of the end. I’d seen him carried out the door to the hospital unconscious and unresponsive. Most of that memory was fear and intense worry coupled with trying to convince myself that everything was going to be okay.

Just a few days later he was dead.

Wednesday

Nothing much happened, I was cleaning and tossing but the day passed in a bit of a fog

Thursday,

Was the actual date… The day Jerry died. I spent with the dog, quietly. 

Friday

I was at the temple for service and that was nice. It was music Jerry arranged or had a particular fondness for. After the service, one of the congregants said they were still upset and a little angry that Jerry had passed on. They said, “You must still be feeling that way too.” 

“Oddly,” I explained, “I don’t. I still miss him terribly, but we had 34 years together. Most of those years were good ones. The years we had were more than many people get. Divorce, illness, accidents, all cut time spent with someone. That we found each other, loved, and endured for all that time was a gift. Of course I’d like to have more time but I’m thankful for what I got.”

The congregant nodded and said I had a good attitude. I suppose maybe I do.

Saturday 

I had a lot on fun and pretty much spent all day yesterday laughing my ass off. 

A long overdue get together with two men I’ve known for 44 years finally happened. We had a drink, in my case two… we wandered, talked, laughed, and enjoyed being together once again.

This get together should have been called the Fixed Income tour!  It was the first time that all three of us got together after having retired.

We met when we were starting out, I remember those first paychecks, waiting in line to buy gas, and wondering why so much of our puny paychecks was whittled away in taxes. 

What I didn’t know then was that these friends would in fact remain lifelong friends who cared, and for whom I cared, about all these years.

To be honest, a shit ton of people pass through our lives. Some of them you’re happy to see go, others you can’t hold onto, time and life pulls you apart, and the last and best category are friends that are constants like stars in the sky.

(Yes, I know stars aren’t forever… Shut it! Science brain. I’m waxing all poetical… The stars in the sky will outlast us and the planet!)

Yesterday  I managed to walk right past a couple of Pro-Palestein protestors with their flags and stupid slogans and not challenge them. My two friends were hanging back a bit as we passed, whether to help if I lost control and shot my mouth off, or to just laugh if shot my mouth off and started a riot, I’m not sure. Perhaps a bit of both…

When we were going to pass the protestor’s spot again I wished I had a lighter because I wondered if I could legally burn their flags. The question popped out of my head following the logic that you can burn an American flag with impunity so why not a foreign flag?

It appeared that the Palestinian protestors had gone home for the day, protesting and waving flags being such hard work. (Dudes, you didn’t have to go to the gym on arms day!)  I presume they were drowning their sorrows about Gaza with a lovely half caf double latte, a hot meal prepared by someone else, and a bong full of the latest variation of pot they’d procured. Their lives are, after all, soooo difficult. 

I was gratified to note that there were only two Palestinian flags and it didn’t look like a lot of people were paying attention to the protestors. Maybe as Americans tend to do, we’re just getting bored hearing about it. Seen any Ukraine flags lately?

I suggested at one point that perhaps the three of us could go on a stealing spree through all the high end stores at the Glendale Galleria in keeping with the times. There was some question about what exactly the cash limit was before it became a felony. Since all of us are planners and have expensive tastes we couldn’t come to consensus about what we could steal and how much. Next time though…

We’re gonna shock the world as the “Geriatric Three”. At our ages it would be the perfect capper to our lives. Mug Shots in our 60s! I wonder if the police are more afraid of arresting old guys than young guys? The young guys are more like brawlers in a school yard, lots of swinging but not much damage.

Old guys though, well, we’re JUST PLAIN MEAN! Next time I see one of the local sheriffs maybe I’ll ask.

I even noticed I was “Hunting” there were some interesting people at the mall and I wasn’t being too subtle about checking them out. It’s been a year, I could start dating again without it being unseemly. I noticed I was doing something I swore I’d never do, I was being a little chicken-hawkish. Some of the guys I was noticing were so young, mid 30s to early 40s. My god! They could easily be my kid!

They were safe… The only way I could’ve caught them was if I was riding on one of those mobility scooters you see old folks riding in the park. The eye candy was nice. I knew some of them were pretty to look at but wholly incompatible with me or any of my beliefs. Perhaps it’s just as well that time and age is slowing me down a bit.

The way my knee was acting up toward the end of the day, I’m probably going to be in the market for a good cane soon. When I got home last night I think the health app said I’d walked 7 miles yesterday. I know I’d walked 1.5 miles with the dog in the early morning before heading to Glendale but was surprised that the total had ended up so high.

My knee didn’t start really acting up until later in the day. I’d tweaked it again on Wednesday or Thursday and had to ice it.

All told yesterday, aside from being slow to start working after we’d been sitting for a while, it wasn’t too bad,  It’s probably a sign that I should increase my walking distance and start stretching a bit more to continue rebuilding strength in both knees. 

One of my friends described being at a Mall as something approximating Hell in his estimation. After seeing Duck-lipped women, men with painted fingernails wearing too short, “skinny jeans” as fashion statements, and too many languages to count he might have a point. 

I’m reminded that I’ve been fairly isolated, preferring to stick close to home. Some would say it’s a holdover from the COVID lockdowns, in truth, it started prior to COVID. I’d been living in San Diego and in close contact due to apartment dwelling, and I’d become super tired of people in general.

The point is, that because I’ve not been around a lot of folks I’m even more uncomfortable in crowds these days. Not that I’m a germaphobe but I’m mindful that my immune system hasn’t needed to be as active in recent years as it had in the past. Without being exposed to the filth of humanity daily, your immune system starts eating Bon Bons and doing its nails.

So I might end up with some stupid late winter cold, but being out in the world with my friends was totally worth it.

The next time we get together perhaps it should be here. We could cook out on the grill, listen to music, and laugh watching the sun track across the mountains, while listening to the sound of light breezes in the trees. Bonus, the dog would be happy with new people to annoy!

The dog is currently pissed at me. He was alone two consecutive nights and missed our ball time. Thankfully the temps have been very moderate but both nights the wind picked up before I got home. He hates the wind!  So last night he pointed the stinky end at me and slept at the foot of the bed.

I’m going to have to make it up to him. 

But that will have to wait until tomorrow. 

Today, Sunday, I’m going to lunch with one of Jerry’s friends and then I’m looking forward to resting a bit on Monday.

Then it’s back to sorting and tossing the accumulated crap. I’m still shooting for having the house on the market in spring. If something happens between now and then to change that desire, it will still be okay because I wont’ have a bunch of crap.

I hope everyone is in as good a space as I am. Uh OH, the Dog is looking for me. It’s time for me to get dressed and take him for a walk.