Sharing with my Brother

I sent my brother the link to this blog. For better or worse, now he’ll have the opportunity to read some of my thoughts and get to know me in a very different way.

Ive been considering just how comfortable I felt about my family seeing me as I sort out my thoughts and express myself.

My hesitation was in sharing some elements of myself. Then I realized that I’m sharing myself via this blog with potentially the whole fucking world so what’s the difference?

Well… the difference is that via the blog, I have a measure of anonymity.

My brother knows me, he’s eaten at my house, I’ve spent time at his place (not nearly enough). He is potentially going to be able to read details of my most intimate behaviors.

That’s where it gets personal and scary, I was worried about one of the most important people in my life thinking less of me.

In all fairness to him, he’s fucking cool. I don’t think he’s  going to have a problem seeing me as I am.

But Hell! We were raised in different households, we’ve never even changed clothes in the same room together. I know more details of the bodies of guys at the gym than I do my own brother.

As we grew to adulthood we spent very little time together, and as men even less. We’re like intimate strangers, we know a lot about our family, we have connections.  Yet  there’s a distance, I love him dearly but sometimes don’t think we KNOW each other.

So I’m going to be myself regardless of my brother reading this. I’m going to talk about the stuff that goes through my head and not worry about it. My Brother deserves to know anything and everything about me.

I think my biggest fear is summed up in this question.

If we weren’t family, would we like each other and still be friends?

I’d like to think the answer is yes.

Sex

I like sex. By that I mean I REALLY like sex.

What man doesn’t?

I like it with myself, while watching porn, with others, with groups, with one hot person, in short let me have sex. Let me be naked, let me be hard, let me CUM!!!

Lately though, I’m embarked on a new exploration.

This exploration has occured due to a discussion I was having with a friend and from reading his blogs.

For a long time Women have supposedly been able to become multi-orgasmic.

Rarely in the west has it been discussed as an option for men. But it is posible.

I was chatting with this friend and mentioned that I was in a sexual rut.

I’d been looking for something to break me out of a long period of the doldrums with regard to my own sexuality, but wasn’t having much luck. Even with innumerable  meaningless assignations I’d enjoyed from time to time.

The problem with super casual sex is that one you’ve both cum, you’re pretty much done.
You all know that feeling. Get naked, lick, lick, lick, suck, suck, suck, groan, groan, groan, fuck, fuck, fuck, “Oh Baby, Oh Baby, Oh Baby” squirt, squirt, squirt, Clean up the cum, pull your jeans, shirt, & shoes on, say you’ll call and beat feet out the door.

You engaged in a purely physical process that is about as satisfying as blowing your nose. When you’re done you move on to the next thing without actually being present in the awesomeness of cumming.

I was looking for something a little more interesting.

My friend mentioned re-learning masturbation. “I thought dude… with all the practice I’ve had I’ve pretty much got that down!”

Oh come on… we all did it as boys and we STILL jeck off. I defy any of you out there to tell me as boys you didn’t work your dicks so hard and often you weren’t raw sometimes.

I personally believe that every Father should talk about masturbation with their sons and it would be very cool if they mentioned that they still did it even though they were married. God knows that would help to remove the guilt and shame.

My friend went on to explain… As boys when we submit to our lust and discover the pleasure that our cocks and balls can give us we learn to be furtive and fast in our masturbatory behavior. Part of this is due to embarassment, part due to religious guilt and part due to the societal messages we get as we’re growing up.

Who hasn’t heard “it will make you go blind”, “you’ll grow hair on your palms”, “Jesus cries when you touch yourself”. (That one is really sick! Jesus was a dude, he’d be crying if you didn’t experience the joy our bodies can bring us.)  In any case because of all of these things, we develop patterns of masturbation the change little as we get older.

As young men in my personal experience, we  get into the mind set “Get it as much and as often as we can” and even in relationships we never really change the behavior.

I think I fell into that category simply because many of my early sexual partners treated sex as some kind of reward for putting up with their stupid shit. (Sweetheart, your hole ain’t quite as golden as you think it is and would it kill you to wash it?)

My first clue should have been that they were using sex as a golden carrot and my second clue should have been that I thought most of the stuff my partners were concerned about was plain stupid. Well live and learn!!!!

As a result I found myself figuring “when I get the chance to fuck, or be sucked I’m going to go as many times as I can”. I was a crazy person and a lot of that sex was really hollow for a wide variety of reasons.

Hell, I’ve been involved in orgies where the object wasn’t necessarily to enjoy yourself but to see if you could cum more and faster than other guys in the room. (As an aside… I’ve won some of those competitions!) In retrospect, I wish that I’d been more in tune with enjoying the moment rather than the competition.

Needless to say unless you grow up, adapt, and learn to slow down, savor, and enjoy the time you’re not going to be all that fulfilled sexually. Which is EXACTLY where I found myself.

What kind of sick bastard finds himself flogging the hell out of a lovely sub and is BORED?

Hi There! Sick bastard here!

Thankfully, I’m not too far gone. In that example the chemistry just wasn’t right for either of us. But performance art is art nonetheless (Another story for another time)

I’ve digressed, a bit.

The simplest explanation of the multi-orgasmic practice is that just before the point that you actually blow your load, you’ve actually begun to orgasm.

This is a technique for hanging in that place and learning to extend the time you stay in the orgasm phase without moving on to the ejaculation phase.

As a part of the practice you develop a realization that you have the choice to blow your load or not. It’s an interesting learning exercise. I can see the potential and I like that there are options I couldn’t see before.

The practice time is a lot of fun too!

I need a lot of practice!

As I get further into this I’ll write more about what I’m experiencing. In the mean time you can check out The MultiOrgasmic Man: Sexual Secrets Every Man Should Know. It’s available from most booksellers.

Watching the strangest movie

The movie is called Monsters saw it on Netflix and decided to give it a shot.

Very bizarre. It’s done almost like a documentary but the interaction between the characters is interesting. If you’re into character development and slow plot development. This one might be worth a watch.Still haven’t gotten to the end so I don’t know if there will be any interesting plot twists. I’ve liked the soundtrack this far too.

Smilas Sense of Snow

and

The girl with the dragon tattoo (In Swedish with English subtitles)

Are also worth a watch if you’re looking for something to entertain you.

Prepping car for trip

Having the engine checked over, some hydraulics, and the cup holder fixed again.

The design of the cupholder is such that and improperly removed arrowhead water bottle will damage the retaining clip. There’s a certain silly irony that a disposible bottle can take out a 100.00 cup holder.

Trying to plan the route to see as much as I can without spending a ton of money on gas.

In general I’m planning a photographic trip so I’m wanting to catch some of the interesting coastal sites before swinging inland. I’m also hoping to see friends along the way.

This is a serious WTF?

Due to prison overcrowding in California a significant number of convicted criminals are being released.

So what exactly does this say?

Is this a condition where California has TOO DAMN MANY LAWS?

Or and this may be more likely,

Does California have TOO DAMN MANY CRIMINALS?

I’m blown away by the kind of thinking that says it fine to release known criminals back into society simply because they’re crowded.

Prison is supposed to be a deterrent. In general I agree with Sheriff Joe Arpaios of Arizona methods. His philosophy is in general pretty much like what I was raised with in the South. In the South they still use chain gangs for road cleanup and repair. YOU DO NOT WANT TO BE IN PRISON IN THE SOUTH!

I was taught that when you were convicted of a crime and sentenced to prison, all but your basic rights were suspended. So you were entitled to an appeal, you were entitled to food, and shelter. Anything beyond that was at the discretion of the Warden.

It astounds me that a California inmate costs the state on average $47000 a year. According to Legislative Analyst’s Office about 2/3 of the cost is administrative in nature (Security, health care, & operations) I think we AS TAXPAYERS are entitled to some kind of compensation. I think that all the inmates should be doing some kind of productive work. Instead of sitting around watching TV, working out, and getting degrees on the taxpayers dime.

Unfortunately, if California tried to use the prison population as a labor force offsetting the cost of incarceration, we’d spend more money fighting legal challenges than we’d save.

There is a subtext in all of this. It’s that there is in fact NO punishment or accountability. Why would the police spend any real effort to deal with petty theft when they know there’s no jail time even if they catch the perpetrator. The problem with this is, now the police are in a position where they’ll pick and choose which cases are more important.

So what’s the answer?

Deport Illegal aliens? Well that would work except that the hardened elements would be back in a week

Accelerate the execution of the prisoners on death row? Well, that would give us a few more cells to work with. It would certainly put the fear of California prison into potential criminals. But cleaning out death row isn’t a viable long term solution.

Eliminate the 3 strike Zero Tolerance laws? I think this actually would help. Zero Tolerance ANYTHING is stupid. When you have mandatory prison terms for certain offenses you automatically stress the prison system. Lets eliminate Zero Tolerance and get back to enforcing the spirit of the law not the letter.

Ship prisoners to out of state prisons? I don’t know if that’s a good idea or a bad one. Eventually, all the prison system will be overloaded, if it’s not already.

Whatever the solution, I don’t think dumping prisoners into society is the answer. Especially not with the state / local budget in crisis and police forces that are understaffed and overworked.

Lets face it most of the time the police arrive in time to clean up the blood, they rarely have an opportunity to actually prevent a crime. Dumping our prison population is far more likely to increase their janitorial duties.

As always, this blog is just my opinion and if you’ve got a different opinion you’re welcome to express it.