Category: WTF?

I started writing this yesterday, but I was way too worked up to be able to complete it.

The State of California denied my claim for a 2 week period. They were apparently really pissed off that I didn’t mail my claim on time.

This is typical of how California works.

Since I’m part of the group that has been working, contributing, paying my outrageously high taxes, and the outrageous car licensing fees I’m penalized because…

I told the truth!

I misplaced the freaking form. 

The EDD never answers their 800 number so I couldn’t even report that I’d misplaced the form or ask for a new one.

In retrospect I should have LIED my ass off. But I’m not wired that way. I don’t think to lie first. Well I guess when dealing with the State I need to get into the habit!

OK fine… California is upset… I was a horrible, rotten, fuckwad and deserve to be punished. And they want their pound of flesh. Whatever…

The real problem is this.

Their letter is ambiguous. It tells me I have the right to appeal their denial. OK! Whatever you mother fucking EDD assholes say!

But due to it’s ambiguity the letter could be interpreted to mean that now all future claims will be denied too.

UHHHH WHAT????!

Now I’m freaking out and PISSED off as all HELL!

See, I have a real problem with “official” documents that are ambiguous. I feel that any documentation should be simple and to the point. The reader should never have to wonder what was meant, what was intended, or if the information applies to them.

The fact that the EDD letter was subject to interpretation left me frustrated.

Am I screwed completely or just a little? What should I do now? How do I resolve this?

Add the fact you can’t get these assholes to answer their phones and… well the walls close in!

Suddenly I felt completely overwhelmed and that I had no recourse or clear instructions to follow. That leads to a deep anger that my brother and I call berserker rage.

This “berserker” probably worked very well in battles of old. It must have worked great when disputes were settled by the swing of a broadsword or a battle ax. Even as the weapons changed it still helped, it gives us unbelievable focus in a fight.

The kind of focus I’m talking about is physical in nature. It’s hunter / predatory  mostly visual and eye hand coordination.

The few physical altercations I’ve been in during my life I didn’t start… I can say with certainty that the    berserker element of my personality finished them. I was the one standing when it was over and people were usually more than a bit shocked at the outcome.

In this bureaucratic world there is no clear enemy. Without a target, the berserker is not particularly useful. In a world of bureaucrats, paper, rules, “not my job” attitudes, where with a keystroke your life can suddenly be made miserable, there is little use for the berserker.

Now, a survival adaptation thats served well for centuries has become a liability. Without a target, the rage that fuels a berserker has no place to go. With no outlet, the rage turns inward and prevents you from thinking calmly and rationally.

It’s a problem that I’m working on. I don’t want to lose the berserker, I just need to keep it reined in when dealing with bureaucrats.

Yesterday, I dropped the reins. As I’m pacing and yelling,

In steps my better half… Quoting Arthur Dent, “I’m English… I know how to queue.” (I was so proud…)

6 or 7 phone calls later…. all of them to local field offices instead of the useless 800 number California prints on all their documentation, and we have an answer.

My better half had to tease little bits of information out of these offices. Nothing useful was volunteered and it really was a matter of asking the right questions.

It turns out, I’m only losing the payment for the period in question. I’m supposed to be receiving some additional claim forms which should catch me up.

Why couldn’t that have been clearly written in their letter? Better yet how about including the forms WITH the letter? Then even though the letter itself was ambiguous I’d have been able to figure out what they meant.

During the phone calls we discovered that there are other options to report continued claims. Really?

Apparently, one can phone a claim in, or even use the internet. Both bits of information might have been nice to have. It would have prevented my ever ending up in this position in the first place.

It turns out the EDD website operates differently if you access it using a Mac vs. Windows. The difference is subtle and deadly.

If you use Windows, menu items are visible that are not visible when using a Mac. These menus link you to things like how to set up phone continued claims, how to set up internet continued claims, make information requests, you know… Minor details!

So the major crisis is, for the moment put to bed. The adrenaline rush from being so pissed off and a small sinus problem left me exhausted.

As I was intermittently napping on the couch I was thinking about how California Unemployment Insurance treats the folks that are collecting like we’re on the clock or something.

Folks… IT’S INSURANCE!

That means I’m making a claim, if the claim is valid (i.e. I’m unemployed) then pay me the money I’m due just like any other insurance policy. I don’t see why California sees fit to punish what are effectively it’s customers.

What I can say is this…

I’m angry. I plan to take my FULL measure of payments and benefits out of California and when I’m done I’ll decide my next move.

I’m thinking it’s time to find a new place to live, a new career, and take my earning potential somewhere else.