Category: Sex

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What the hell is 2SLGBTQQIA+ ????

Oh, now I know…

Two Spirit, lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, questioning, intersex and asexual

Oh for fucks sake! Can we stop with all this bullshit? I seriously long for the day when we were all either GAY, Bi or Straight, and big surprise gender didn’t fucking matter. Boys could do with boys. Girls could do with girls. Bi’s could do with everybody. Straights went with the opposite sex, and everybody got their jollies.

Now days, just to discuss having sex with anybody, much less figure out if they’re your cup of tea seems to require a Ouija Board, a Cray super computer, access to the internet, a magic decoder ring, and perhaps a lawyer and witnesses.

And some of my friends wonder why I prefer older horny straight men who just want to get off. A lot of older guys have gotten past the societal bullshit and more focused on enjoying “right now.”

A hard cock has no conscience. A truism I’m more than willing to exploit and I’ve got a six pack of beer in the fridge for just such occasions!

At least then it’s a simple deal. A few drinks, the acknowledgment that we’re both horny and the simple joy of taking care of business. Yipee! We both feel great… Shower, and out the door, on to other things.

One of my all time favorite drawings! Thanks to
M S 12/22/09 and deviantart.com

I’m to the point that I’m going to start asking for people’s genetic coding on a memory stick. I’ll plug it in and have my computer do a quick scan to determine that the person is;

a) human,

b) the actual gender they’re representing.

With the right software, it shouldn’t take more than a few minutes to verify.

I don’t want to be drawn into whatever this insanity is. I truly no longer give a shit. I’m so adamant on that position that I’ll be perfectly content to pleasure myself from here on out. Fuck the complexity, it’s not worth the effort.

This shit is why the gay community is fracturing apart. I could probably make an argument that it’s somehow associated with declining birth rates too.

It’s notable that cultures that do not acknowledge all this bullshit don’t seem to have any difficulties inserting tab A into slot B and nine months later having another mouth to feed.

I know I’d be super pissed off to find that a woman I’d been trying to conceive a child with was actually a transgendered male who’d not bothered to tell me the whole truth. I mean it might be a lot of great sex… But not what I had in mind starting out. It’s tough to put a bun in an oven that isn’t actually an oven. After all, not every transgendered person is as unfortunate in their choice of surgeons as Admiral Levine.

YIKES! There’s a refund due.

Yeah I said it, so what? It’s an obvious and observable truth isn’t it?

It’s well past time for all this to stop. The only people left who care about it, are the people who regardless of their real or perceived genders would be self centered, narcissistic, whiny, harpies or harridans, anyway.

Let’s just stop playing to their issues and instead let them return to their psychiatrist’s couches to hash out their problems. I don’t want to be on a psychiatric couch because I’ve been driven insane by them hashing out their problems in full public view.

To the transgendered. I truly hope you find peace, joy, and comfort in your own skin…

But I’m not interested in being dragged along on your journey to nirvana. I’m also super pissed that you’ve effectively destroyed everything I once enjoyed with your constant whinging. I’ve got a new acronym for all of you. I’ve got no more patience to keep up with your ever expanding nom de plums.

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ+åß≈ç√®´∑†¥¨ˆø¬˚∆˙√∫˜µ≤≥¬øˆ¨†¡£¢∞§¶•ªº

There I fixed it for ya.

Now get the fuck out of my life and don’t let the door hit you in the ass on your way…

(I just painted that door!)

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When 3-ways go right they’re a lot of fun!

Hell.pngI’m sure I’m going to hell.

I’m equally sure that I’m going to be in good company!

Got involved in a little 3 way action recently and while we weren’t doing anything too wild and crazy, aside from being naked and aroused with each other, we all ended up satisfied.

naked6.jpgIt felt good to touch and be touched. It felt good to engage in simple play instead of pulling out implements that would make Torquemada and the Marquis de Sade, envious. I’d guess that the reasons for their envy would be different, In his pictures Torquemada looks like a man seriously in need of a blow job.

The Marquis on the other hand looks like a party animal.

In any case, this situation was particularly nice because of it’s spontaneity and simplicity.

oral-sex-221010-large_new.jpgJust sex, no expectations of love, romance, or anything beyond NSA (no strings attached) lets’ get naked and get off.

I’d bet if you asked men generally what they really want, they’d say simple NSA sex regularly would do them just fine. Regardless of if they were in a relationship or not.

They’d probably say that the occasional 3 way involving their spouse would be A-OK too.

To frame this in the context of Christmas, each new person I get to see naked and have fun with… Well, It’s like opening presents on Christmas Morning.

ChristmasCard2.pngFun, Exciting, and you’ll never know what you’re going to get.

I suggest opening as many presents as you can, and be a present to other folks too.

Now I’m off to go shopping

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The cold from hell is finally abating

For those of you that have The Cold. I give you hope. The light you see glimmering at the end of the tunnel is not necessarily an oncoming train or “The Light” you’re supposed to go into when you die.

After two weeks of misery, today I’m finally feeling more like my old self.

This has been the worst cold or flu I’ve had in many years. And to add a little spice and variety to the wonder that the virus brought into my life. The damn thing was morphing as it progressed. It’s a tease too, I’d start to feel better, then wham! A whole new set of symptoms. Then about the time my body would get a handle on those symptoms, pow! Something completely new.

Over the past two weeks, I’ve been chilled to the bone with my teeth chattering in a sleeping bag, while the ambient temp in the house was 70° F. I spent a couple of days where I was too hot with the temp in the house at 65° F. I’ve had my joints ache so bad it was agony to move my legs. That was followed up with body wide cramping of all my muscles. Through it all, my sinuses were producing all manner of gothic horrors (I had a club handy just in case the kleenex started moving!) and the coughing and hacking left my already painful ribcage feeling like I’d been in a violent car accident.

How do I know I’m on the mend? The same way every man knows they’re getting over something… I’m thinking really dirty thoughts and want to just get NASTY.

Ladies, that’s the way we work… As we get sick we want to screw because we know we’ll feel better for a little while and if whatever we’re coming down with kills us, well at least we went out on a good note.

All men want to have an unseemly grin on our faces in our caskets. I personally want to have a dirty smirk so locked on my face that my mother would blush and my spouse can’t have it jackhammered off. I want my last hurrah to be etched on my face and so dirty that folks seriously consider a closed casket. For the sake of the children, don’t ya know.

Once we survive the disease, we want to screw to declare to the world that we’re awesome, victorious, and our genes are worthy. Besides it makes us feel better. ( are you seein a theme here?) Ya just have to picture a big silver back gorilla and you’ve got a snapshot of us and what makes us tick.

So, I’m off to pound my chest, or whatever else seems appealing.

Don’t give up hope, The Cold doesn’t last forever.

It just seems that way.

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The problem with 3 ways, someone is almost ALWAYS selfish!

Interesting

By now you’ve all figured out that I’m a contradiction.

On the one hand I’m somewhat conservative, on the other hand, in some areas I’m uhh… adventurous. “Yeah that’s a good word I’ll stick to it.” There is rarely a clear cut predictor about where I’m going to come down on any particular subject.

Love it or hate it my reactions are almost always “Interesting”.

Recently, I met someone who is interesting and adventurous and we ended up in a 3 way with my partner of many years. This isn’t the first time and likely won’t be the last.  This time however, I was in a position where I was a little more disconnected than usual.

A good time was had by all (I hope) but one of the things I noticed was that in a 3 way there is no room for selfishness.

The absolute best 3 way I’ve ever been in was a situation where everyone was all about giving and enjoying the pleasure of giving. This was in my very early years and I naively thought, “sex would always be like this.”  In that situation, not only should the “Needy” not apply… They weren’t allowed to apply.

This more recent situation was a bit different, and once again I was the one forced into trying to keep all the balls in the air. Ahem so to speak.

The point is, a 3 way can be really awesome for one, two, or all three of the parties involved. But one should always be mindful that sharing is important. You shouldn’t allow a situation where only one of the parties is catering to the wants and needs of two of the parties exclusively.

dildobrunch

Ok so you want something inserted… Great! How about remembering to give a comforting touch, or a kiss to whatever part of another person you can reach?

How about remembering that the person driving the two massive latex instruments of insertion now, no longer has a hand free.

How about appreciating that the “driver” here might be using both hands, and a thigh and a knee to bring pleasure to two of you but that the “driver” might be completely off balance and while they’re enjoying watching you squirm, they might also like a little help with balance, particularly if you’re thrashing all over the place.

How about remembering that this act of gymnastic legerdemain might be very uncomfortable and should be rewarded with a comforting hand or mouth, and that it’s in your best interest to keep the practitioner of these gymnastics engaged and intensely pleasured so that they are able to more easily forget about the cramping and joint pain they’re experiencing.

3wayfeet

You’d think that all these things would be self evident.

Even if they’re not, you’d assume that when one of the people who happens to be tied up, comments on the gymnastics with surprise and lust shining brightly in their eyes. That the other participant might decide to discontinue being selfish.

Alas, your assumption would be wrong, such was not the case.

In retrospect it’s obvious I tied the wrong person up. Live and learn!

What I learned was that I need additional rope, a ball gag and a sturdy chair in the next room!

ballgagsturdychair

The next 3 way is going to involve tying up the selfish party in another room and then having wild monkey sex with the person who appreciates my tender mercies.

Just once in these situations… I’d really like to be the one who lays back and fucking enjoys being serviced!

Just once!!!

I should say however, I wouldn’t trade the experiences I’ve had for anything.

I love busting a nut as much as the next guy, but having complete control of two people in the throes of sexual anticipation, joy, depravity, ecstasy is a total rush!

And yes… I’ve probably crossed the TMI line with this post.

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NSFW This is Officially the 666th blog post.

Oral sex 221010 large new

So in honor of this auspicious occasion, I decided to throw something out here that is worthy of the number 666.

Here goes.

Like all men, I like to get my rocks off as often as I can.

I’m a master masturbator and I can absolutely say I’ve never had my hand fall asleep stroking my dick.

I have on occasion fallen asleep while stroking my dick but it wasn’t my hands fault…

Cocksucker21

Sex is one of those things that I don’t think I get enough of. I mean I could have sex… and presented with another opportunity 1/2 hour (or less) later I’m going to be interested.

Like most men I like having my dick sucked. I really like having my balls licked, kissed & sucked too. If someone is willing to do that on command then I’m totally into it.

Anyone who wants to suck my dick is welcome to do it. Just let me get comfortable, have a drink and you can crawl between my legs and stay there for as long or as many loads as you’d like.

NewImage

I love standing above someone on their knees as they bury their noses in my pubes. I like the submission and at the same time knowing that they’re getting to do exactly what they want. My dick is their pleasure.

What I’d never acknowledged (even to myself) until very recently was that I like the power.

I totally get off on it.

“Lick my balls! ” What a thrill it is to bark that order at someone and have them jump to it.

“Suck my dick.” and have a willing supplicant allow me to hold their head and choke them sliding my dick in & out of their mouth and down their throat.

NewImage

But shoving my dick down someones throat while I’m grunting and shooting my jiz into their waiting mouth and watching it back up spilling down their chin and dripping onto their body really gets my motor running.

Don’t get me wrong, I like to fuck too. Someone offering themselves to me begging me to penetrate them can be a real turn on.

I recently was in a situation where I got completely in the moment (so to speak) and something clicked in my head as I held a partners head and used their mouth & throat.

What clicked was This is fucking awesome I’m completely in control and they’re loving being taken. In fact the rougher I was the better we both seemed to like it.

In the end I was just face fucking them, bouncing my balls off their cheek and honest to god I was relishing their struggle to breathe.

When I blew my load they greedily sucked and swallowed. However when I got to a position that I could see their face, my cum was running down their face onto the pillow. I liked that they’d be smelling my jizz all night long.

I kept making ’em suck my dick even though I was softening, feeding the last of my load down that greedy throat.

Even now sitting here writing about it, I’ve got a semihard that’s dripping precum from the memory.

If you’re into it… I’m always looking for mouths open and waiting, the line forms to the right.

Let me put my bone in your throat.