Category: Humor

Posted on

If you’re gonna lie, make sure the facts aren’t easily verified.

That’s kinda rule number 1 of telling lies.

What brought this to mind was the wailing and gnashing teeth over Jason Aldean’s song, “Try That In A Small Town”

The song itself has been out since May but the music video has gained all kinds of attention in recent days. From what I’ve seen of the video, it incorporates news clips of violent riots, and crimes taking place.

It’s nothing we haven’t all seen in the past two to four years too. (As an aside, the last five words of the previous sentence are why you should know how To, Too, and Two, work. And yes, the “Too” at the end is grammatically incorrect.)

Anyhow, before I digress into some linguistic insanity, I’ll get back on point.

The media, and even other country singers are saying that Aldean’s song is a call for violence and some have gone so far as to say the song is racist and calls from lynchings.

Uhh. NOPE! I’ve personally heard the song. The Lyrics are readily available on the internet.

THE COLONY, TEXAS – MAY 10: Jason Aldean performs at the 2023 ACM Lifting Lives Topgolf Tee-Off And Rock On Fundraiser at Topgolf on May 10, 2023 in The Colony, Texas. (Photo by Richard Rodriguez/Getty Images)

Try That In A Small Town

Jason Aldean

Sucker punch somebody on a sidewalk
Carjack an old lady at a red light
Pull a gun on the owner of a liquor store
Ya think it’s cool, well, act a fool if ya like

Cuss out a cop, spit in his face
Stomp on the flag and light it up
Yeah, ya think you’re tough

Well, try that in a small town
See how far ya make it down the road
Around here, we take care of our own
You cross that line, it won’t take long
For you to find out, I recommend you don’t
Try that in a small town

Got a gun that my granddad gave me
They say one day they’re gonna round up
Well, that shit might fly in the city, good luck

Try that in a small town
See how far ya make it down the road
Around here, we take care of our own
You cross that line, it won’t take long
For you to find out, I recommend you don’t
Try that in a small town

Full of good ol’ boys, raised up right

If you’re looking for a fight
Try that in a small town
Try that in a small town

Try that in a small town
See how far ya make it down the road
Around here, we take care of our own
You cross that line, it won’t take long
For you to find out, I recommend you don’t
Try that in a small town

Try that in a small town
Ooh-ooh
Try that in a small town

Written by: Kelley Lovelace, Neil Thrasher, Tully Kennedy, Kurt Michael Allison

Album: Try That In A Small Town

Released: 2023

I guess it’s okay as far as songs go, were it not for the controversy I’d have missed it entirely. As prose goes, there are a few stanzas that just seem strained. That’s just my opinion, and worth exactly as much as you paid for it.

There are a number of Jason Aldean songs I like a lot, this just isn’t one of them.

The point is, there’s nothing racist in the lyrics. Nowhere is the word lynching used. Nowhere do the lyrics suggest that “Old Black Joe,” should be strung up.

Before you freak out screaming I’m a racist. “Old Black Joe’s still picking cotton,” is a line from a Leonard Cohen song called “Everybody Knows” I wanted to use an actual verifiable lyric that was easily checked.

Everybody Knows should be an anthem for the Biden years!

FYI I prefer the Sigrid performance to the Cohen performance. I think it’s the orchestration.

Before screaming harridans decide to cancel Leonard Cohen, they should know that a) Cohen will not give a fuck because he’s dead, and b) they’ll have to cancel the movie Justice League because “Everybody Knows” is the opening song. If it was good enough just a couple of years ago what’s changed?

I’m just asking…

The problem is that the video clips in Aldean’s music video kind of rub the leftists’ noses in the shitstorm they’ve caused and continue to allow with their stupid policies.

Everybody Knows multiple cities in this once great nation are dumpster fires of crime without consequences. I live 70 miles from one of these festering shitholes. Approximately 400 miles up the interstate is the penultimate example showing where these policies lead.

That city is called San Francisco. But it’s not just the city of San Francisco, you have to include Oakland too. Oakland has always been teetering on the edge. Even 20 years ago, you didn’t want to be on the street after dark in Oakland. Now…

I’m thankful that should I decide to go visit the northern parts of California, Interstate 5 swings well clear of the Bay Area.

It does sort of piss me off. San Francisco was once a breathtakingly beautiful city.

I always enjoyed business trips in that city and while I knew the hotels were way overpriced as was the food, I didn’t mind paying because San Francisco had a happy vibe.

Business trips, or even standing in the Moscone Center all day for a trade show weren’t horrible. I knew in the evening I’d be trying some new food, or seeing something that would put a smile on my face. The last rays of the sun gleaming off the spire of the TransAmerica building for example. The Golden Gate Bridge disappearing artfully into a fog bank.

Chicago, New York, and St Louis, had some interesting sights. But once I’d seen them I was done. For me, there was never the desire to live in any of those cities. San Francisco on the other hand, I always picked up the newspaper for the real estate section.

Property and apartments were always out of my price range. Or more concisely, beyond what I personally would pay. A one bedroom fixer-upper shack of a house with street parking and no yard for 750,000 was simply insanity that I could not and would not buy into.

Now I wouldn’t even think of living in or near San Francisco. I can’t even think of myself visiting the city because I don’t think I could stand the heartbreak.

The racist claim against Jason Aldean is false on its face. In many of the clips shown, you can’t really tell what race the perpetrators are.

The fact that the leftists assume the race of the perpetrators then accuse Aldean of racism says a lot more about the leftists and their view of the world than it does about Aldean.

Leftists have spent the past decade reopening old wounds. They’ve divided us along racial lines, I think their assumption Aldean is racist based on the news clips, means they expect violence to be committed by black and brown people. Even though in Portland, and Seattle the mix of the crowd was about even.

Leftists, if you’re going to lie, at least do it well. You’re not even putting in any effort. You just expect everyone to believe whatever CNN or MSNBC chitter on about.

That may be true and has been for many years, but you should ask yourself how much longer that will last, if you don’t hold up your end of the bargain. You should be constructing at least marginally believable and difficult to disprove lies.

It’s the “marginally believable and difficult to disprove” part that makes CNN’s or MSNBC’s spin work. Without that, the people will simply stop watching the mainstream media and then where will you be?

If you get right to it maybe leftists have been phoning it in for a while.

How many lies have unraveled in just the last two weeks or so?

IRS Whistleblowers having evidence to show that their investigations into Hunter was stymied with intent.

Hunter’s laptop being not only real, but verifying the accounts of corruption and disproving Joe’s lies about talking with Hunter about business dealings and / or receiving bribes. It’s strange to see the laptop corroborating the whistleblowers stories.

Those of you on the left, really do need to step up your game.

I’m sure however, that Jason Aldean appreciates that you and CMT pushed his song to Number one on the iTunes Charts. Keep screaming morons, Aldean and his lovely wife will roll around naked in the additional millions you’re swinging their way.

Posted on

I know it seems like I pick on the Democratic Party a lot…

But DAMN! They’re such easy targets!

Most people only step on a rake in the yard once!

The Democrats have a habit of dancing around like old cartoon characters did.

There are some of you who will not get that reference because many of those old cartoons have been deemed politically incorrect, or too violent, or racist, or, or, or, or, or….

Just ask Whoopie Goldberg as she appears before the actual cartoons on my Looney Tunes DVD boxed set.

Someone in Hollywood thought it necessary to explain that animated line drawings, some of which were produced as war propaganda were violent, and depicted other people or races in a negative light. Believe me, the last thing I want or need is a social justice lesson when all I want to watch is unrealistic mayhem to put a smile on my face.

Hell! I learned basic physics from Wile E Coyote.

You youngsters never had a chance to see cause and effect and consequences presented to you in the phosphorescent glow of a massive CRT over your bowl of Fruit Loops, on a Saturday morning.

As an aside, if you sat in daddy’s chair with a photographic plate behind you, you could also get free chest X-rays. 

Take that Obamacare!

This is part of the reason that people of a certain age, a.k.a. old as dirt look at the Democrat party follies with a mixture of outright amusement and almost blinding horror.

I honestly don’t remember any political party, or any Presidential administration in my lifetime that was capable of as many self inflicted wounds as Wile E. Coyote.

Maybe Nixon? Clinton?

Clinton just couldn’t keep it in his pants. Although I still chuckle thinking about Yasser Arafat roasting his ass during a humid hot east coast summer day in the Rose garden while Clinton was diddling an intern in the Oval Office. That shit cracks me up!

Clinton did teach the American People the art of lying by redefining a word or group of words in plain view, on national television. That was fucking magical to watch.

I’m still unclear about what sex is. Flash forward to now, and I’m also unclear about what a woman is, so I suppose the question of sex is moot.

By comparison to Biden, Nixon and Clinton were Choir Boys.

The Democratic Party, at this point would make Wile cringe, and Bugs Bunny would show compassion and mercy, by just walking away.

Bugs would say, “Well Folks, there’s nothing I could do that tops what they do to themselves. Enjoy the show.”

Don’t get me wrong, I left the Republican Party too. They were missing the point and continue to do so. I’m sure that in due time, they’ll be the objects of my ire and ridicule. Simply because they’re no different than the Democrats. The like to tout that they have the moral and fiscal high ground but they’re just as likely to fund Billion Dollar boondoggles as the Democrats, if those billions go into the pockets of RNC donors.

As much as I hate the Biden Administration, I do almost feel sorry for Joe. I strongly believe that Obama is the power behind the throne. The way things are going, Obama will get to dance away with his Reputation intact and it will be Joe who’s left holding the bag. He’ll be labeled the worst President ever and all the ills of the Democratic Party will be left at his door.

I fully expect for the Democratic Party to abandon Joe. Then they’ll hold him up as a poster child depicting everything that is wrong with “The Patriarchy,” and “White People in power,” Which will usher in a Black Female candidate and they’ll sell that as the way forward to Democratic voters. It won’t be Kamala, she is so thoroughly unlikeable that most folks don’t even see her unless she cackles. 

No it will be someone slick. I could see it being Michelle Obama and that would result in Barry having a significant hand in five Presidential terms. 

The sad thing is that the Republican Party will never see it coming. After 20 some odd years of Obama’s idea of hope and change, the corruption and gamesmanship between the parties will be firmly and permanently entrenched. There will be no coming back from that, I rather suspect we’ll have some weird combination of Idiocracy, Escape from New York, and Escape from LA, with maybe just a touch of Mad Max beyond Thunderdome.

That’s so long as China doesn’t keep playing with biological weapons, yeah I totally believe that COVID was a bioweapon that escaped before it was actually as deadly or infectious as it was supposed to be. I think Fauci believed he was funding legitimate albeit banned in America predictive disease research. The CCP saw it as an opportunity to advance their research into potential bioweapons.

Let’s face it, a disease that kills your enemy that you are also immune to makes conquest a lot easier and preserves the existing infrastructure. We can extrapolate the effectiveness of such conquest by looking at history. Blankets laden with smallpox given to the Native Americans or Hawaiians for example… Granted, the settlers didn’t know what they were doing at the time but the result was the same.

 If China is allowed to keep playing with chimeric viruses then I think the whole situation will look more like Resident Evil and Idiocracy.

Yeah, maybe me having dreams I remember isn’t such a good thing. I woke up with this weird post in my head this morning.

I suppose on the up side, my brain is doing garbage collection… On the down side my brain is doing garbage collection and purging a bunch of disjointed bit & pieces of wrecked trains of thought, and you’re going to get to read them.

My God have mercy on your soul!

Posted on

Great Job you MORONS!!!!

Thanks a million you TQ2+ (Insert random characters, glyphs, and numbers)

We of the LGB community want a fucking divorce, and we want our LGB community back from you.

We spent a shit ton of time and effort to calm down the church folks and the rabid conservatives. Anyone remember the controversy surrounding Anita Bryant?

We worked super hard getting the majority of people to realize that all we wanted was the ability to have all the rights marriage effortlessly conferred. We didn’t want anything more or less than equality and to live with who we loved.

In a very few short years you motherfuckers in the arbitrary, (I’ll be Trans today,) or gender fuck drag community have fucked us all.

In truth, the majority of the world doesn’t give a fuck about how anyone gets their rocks off. The general population doesn’t care that you’re trans or whatever. Most of us just wish you’d deal with your shit and leave the rest of us out of it. We really don’t care, and just wish we didn’t have to hear about it all day, every day, or deal with your bastardization of the language.

Here’s a simple question for you to ponder. What part of, “I don’t give a shit,” don’t you understand?

That’s coming from a gay guy.

Have any of you morons heard the religious right lately? A lot of them who used to be at least tolerant, sound worse than Westboro Baptist Church now. (Look it up, godhatesfags.org)

They’re quoting the book of Revelations about the vomitous abortion you’ve made of the rainbow flag. By extension they’re trying to rally around taking back the rainbow flag in God’s name.

Personally I don’t think we need a flag anymore and you assholes have sure screwed that pooch (No! Not your friend in Puppy Play Drag! Don’t get me started on this…)

When folks start whipping themselves into a frenzy over a deity who doesn’t make his or her intentions clear, you get rabid revival tent preachers claiming that God spoke to them and demanded action from the faithful.

You want to see what that looks like? Look up gay murders or executions in Muslim countries. There are plenty of videos of their faithful tossing Gays off roofs.

Historically, “Thou shalt not Suffer a Witch to live,” Had some serious consequences during the inquisition and / or Salem witch trials! Remember… It’s a short step to, “Thou shalt not suffer a fag to live.”

You got a sampling of it at the Dodgers Game over the weekend. That crowd was mostly pissed off and offended Catholics.

Great job, you’ve set us back 40 years and you’re too selfish and stupid to recognize the danger or the damage you’re causing.

Moreover, you’re going to have the LGB community siding with the conservatives and religious folks in this battle.

Because…

WE THINK YOU’RE WRONG

We’re tired of hearing about your perceived grievances.

At least those of us honest enough to speak our minds are.

We know full well that there’s a bunch of our ultra progressive brothers and sisters who will excommunicate or cancel us.

I say so what? I’m also pretty sure that there are a lot of folks like me, who resent the annoyance of using your pronouns or trying to figure out which bathroom symbols mean “Men’s room”.

Half the time I’m tempted to go behind a building and piss on a wall. This is especially true if I’m a little tipsy.

One of the new symbols looks like some kind of weird clock and I’m not sure what time it’s supposed to indicate. I really resent having something as simple as taking a piss being made complicated with gender ideology bullshit.

The simplest solution is not new and confusing symbology. The solution is a sign that says, “Bathroom”. If there are two doors with the same signage social convention would have people knocking before attempting entry and waiting their turn.

Ain’t it funny how the old or simplest solutions often work the best?