The cold from hell is finally abating

For those of you that have The Cold. I give you hope. The light you see glimmering at the end of the tunnel is not necessarily an oncoming train or “The Light” you’re supposed to go into when you die.

After two weeks of misery, today I’m finally feeling more like my old self.

This has been the worst cold or flu I’ve had in many years. And to add a little spice and variety to the wonder that the virus brought into my life. The damn thing was morphing as it progressed. It’s a tease too, I’d start to feel better, then wham! A whole new set of symptoms. Then about the time my body would get a handle on those symptoms, pow! Something completely new.

Over the past two weeks, I’ve been chilled to the bone with my teeth chattering in a sleeping bag, while the ambient temp in the house was 70° F. I spent a couple of days where I was too hot with the temp in the house at 65° F. I’ve had my joints ache so bad it was agony to move my legs. That was followed up with body wide cramping of all my muscles. Through it all, my sinuses were producing all manner of gothic horrors (I had a club handy just in case the kleenex started moving!) and the coughing and hacking left my already painful ribcage feeling like I’d been in a violent car accident.

How do I know I’m on the mend? The same way every man knows they’re getting over something… I’m thinking really dirty thoughts and want to just get NASTY.

Ladies, that’s the way we work… As we get sick we want to screw because we know we’ll feel better for a little while and if whatever we’re coming down with kills us, well at least we went out on a good note.

All men want to have an unseemly grin on our faces in our caskets. I personally want to have a dirty smirk so locked on my face that my mother would blush and my spouse can’t have it jackhammered off. I want my last hurrah to be etched on my face and so dirty that folks seriously consider a closed casket. For the sake of the children, don’t ya know.

Once we survive the disease, we want to screw to declare to the world that we’re awesome, victorious, and our genes are worthy. Besides it makes us feel better. ( are you seein a theme here?) Ya just have to picture a big silver back gorilla and you’ve got a snapshot of us and what makes us tick.

So, I’m off to pound my chest, or whatever else seems appealing.

Don’t give up hope, The Cold doesn’t last forever.

It just seems that way.

Whoops! Down the rabbit hole

receiptsample

It was a simple enough thing. Find a receipt so that we could claim the warranty replacement / repair.

“No problem,” says I, heading toward my computer. And that’s when it all fell down.

I’ve been keeping electronic receipts on my computer for years. There’s something like 2700 emails that are all in a nice neat folder in my email client. I started doing that because for years Mac Email did a great job of indexing and allowing me to find important emails like receipts.

Except today!

Today, I stumbled again over an indexing problem in Mac Mail. It’s been rearing it’s head from time to time.  I’ve done all the corrective actions specified TWICE! Still the search and indexing functions are all but useless in Mail.

The Final Solution, the Apple Web Site is recommending, which is the final solution on any computer is to re-install the OS. 

I’m thinking I’ll wait on that. In a couple of months, Apple is releasing a new OS and at that point my plan is to rework my computer anyway. 

Rather than go through this process twice in a short period of time, I’d rather combine the pain.

This leaves me with the initial problem… finding that receipt!

GRRRRR

Searching one email at a time isn’t cutting it. Sorting the emails in the folder should narrow my efforts… working working, working, working.

A couple of hours later…

Other half, “What are you doing?”

“Looking for that receipt”

Other half “Oh, um that problem is taken care of. Hours ago! I called the rewards program and they emailed me a copy of the receipt. I’m leaving now to drop the whatsit at the repair place.”

Some days, I’m too stupid to use a crayon!

“GRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrr!” Pounding head on desk.

“Okay, drive careful, could you pick up some aspirin while you’re out? I’m going to need it.”

Ahhh the strange culture we live in…

ChrisPratt

I saw this headline 

Chris Pratt: ‘I am just dumb’

I thought oh for goodness sake NOW WHAT?

As I waited for the web page to load I was wondering who Mr. Pratt had offended. Women? GLBT? Victims of Hetrochromia? White people? Black people? Asian People? Latino people? Sufferers of debilitating Jock or Vaginal itch? Dinosaurs?

hetrochromia

The list playing out in my head spiraled on and on because everyone these days is a victim.

Then the page opened, and I busted up laughing.

Pratt, who is staring in the new Jurassic World movie was “Pre-Apologizing” for what ever offense, slip of the tongue, offhand comment, or expression that might offend someone during the upcoming press junket promoting the movie.

I liked the guy in Guardians of the Galaxy. I never watched Parks & Recreation so I can’t comment.

This “getting in front of the problem,” and you know there will be a problem, is just funny as hell. 

It’s also is nice to know I’m not alone in thinking that we’re all way to damn sensitive.

Chris Pratt with Raptor babies

Chris Pratt found a clever, funny way to poke at “the elephant in the room.”

Heck I might actually go see Jurassic World in the theater…

Movie theater, Humm, Texting, people with too much cologne, talking, answering the phone and then having a conversation, bratty children, screaming babies, the sound track too loud, crowds…

On second thought, I’ll wait for the DVD.

This is why many conservative gay folks…

sandyrios

… are still in the conservative closet. Yeah they’re out about their sexuality, but not about their philosophy, or politics.

All I can say after reading and listening to what this woman said is, “ARE YOU F&$KING KIDDING ME?”

Sandy Rios of Sandy Rios In The Morning said ON AIR that she’s wondering if the sexuality of the Amtrak Engineer in Tuesday’s train derailment was a factor in the accident.

PennsylvaniaTrainCrash

She goes to great lengths and is obviously choosing her words carefully to say she’s not inferring the accident happened because Bostian is gay…

Then goes on to infer exactly that! (Yeah and some of your best friends are gay too!)

Here’s a link to the article in the Huffington Post

LAfreewaybailout

This is the same as me saying, “I’m not inferring that because her last name is hispanic that she’s likely to leave the scene of an auto accident but well sometimes being hispanic is a factor in hit & run accidents… I was once in an accident where a hispanic lady left the scene. I mean she just abandoned her car and a friend picked her up before the cops came.“

True story, The lady did abandon her car on the freeway, left behind one hell of a mess for the CHP to clean up. 

For years gays have been accused of having larger amounts of disposable income than their straight counterparts. Additionally, they’re supposed to be more into taking care of themselves, they’re supposed to drive nicer cars, have nicer homes and apartments, they’re typically well educated, well insured, and well just awesome in every way.

Were you describing a straight person with all those same traits, you’d say they’re responsible & reliable.

gayborhood

Yet when you preface those same traits with “They’re gay…” somehow these traits lose their blush and now all that responsibility & training counts for nothing with conservative assholes like Rios.

I’m a mostly conservative asshole, and I know a lot of really conservative gay men. We’re not obvious about our conservative beliefs for two reasons.

1) Lots of gays are totally Democratic, progressive liberal dip shits.

2) People like this ‘gash in a sundress’, (Thank you Pam from TrueBlood, that is a great line!)

Pam

When you say you’re a conservative gay person you’re treated badly, and people identify you with Perry, Santorum, Rush Limbaugh, or crazed bible thumpers from Westboro Baptist Church.  Obviously, none of my conservative gay friends are anything like these examples, and by the way we don’t hate ourselves either.

Generally we’re thinkers who tend to prefer common sense practicality over “theory”. We don’t tend to buy into social engineering and are more about people deciding what’s best for themselves. We realize we don’t have to agree on every point with someone else and can hold discussions with folks who have different opinions without resorting to name calling. After we’ve had even “spirited” discussions, we can still be friends, have a beer and even sex, and feel great about life and how lucky we are.

WestboroBaptistchurch

Thank goodness this lady isn’t mainstream.

Next, people like Rios would be claiming that gays shouldn’t operate heavy machinery, drive cars, or fly planes, for fear of a gay person “getting the Vapors” and losing control.

[After all it only takes one despondent faggot, and planes get crashed into the ground.

Oh wait the German pilot was straight… oh wait the Islamic terrorists that crashed into Pennsylvania were straight, and it was a gay man that was one of the leaders of the rebellion against the terrorists on flight 93.]

Flight93memorial

The same line of reasoning was, ironically enough, used to deny women the vote and briefly the ability to drive in this country.

That line of “Less than” reasoning is STILL used in some countries in the Middle East to deny women’s rights.

So Ms. Rios, YA might want to think for just a moment about all the privileges and rights you have, which would have been denied simply because you’re a woman and therefore “Less Capable”.

Then for just a moment think about the fact that you’re suggesting a “Less Than Capable” status because someone is gay. Then after that…

selfiedriving

Do us ALL a favor and shut your pie hole!

Allow me to spell this out using small words so you can understand the meaning.

Gay people are just like everyone else.

Give gay people ALL the rights of being a US citizen and you’ll see just how normal, and dare I say it, “Average” they are.

Oh and by the way, we’re better drivers than you straights…

We do have nicer cars and therefore have to be better drivers, just to avoid accidents with distracted soccer moms like you!

KILL ALL HUMANS!

BenderKillallhumans

After careful consideration and study.

The inevitable conclusion is, to solve climate change we must kill all humans!

After all, the California Delta Smelt, The Wyoming Sage Grouse, The Spotted Owl, and innumerable other species deserve to live in peace with their habitats intact.

As I’m sure you’ll all agree, the only viable solution is we must all die.

To that end, extermination booths will be set up in your neighborhood. When you see the booths, be the first of your friends to step in and die with dignity. It’s quick, painless, and fun!

StarTrekATasteofArmageddon

Persons not stepping into the booths voluntarily, will be hunted down and shot.

Do Mother Earth a favor, kill yourself!


That’s what goes through my mind every single time I read about another EPA or BLM report describing the plight of some creature, in an attempt to guilt us into … WHAT?

Accepting Climate change is real? Irrelevant

Paying some stupid ass carbon tax? Pointless!

Turning over yet more control of our daily lives to a bunch of bureaucrats? There it is! That’s the reason for the guilt ridden landfills full of newsprint.

bueaucrats

I get pissed off.

Species come and go all the time on this planet. They have done since before we came down from the trees, and they’ll no doubt continue to do so long after our bones and our civilization is dust.

Stop guilting us!

If we all resolve to live taking actions daily that minimize our impact on the planet, things will get better.

Stop pumping out children that you simply throw away!

forest

That goes for you Catholics, and you folks in India too.

Stop rushing out to buy the newest latest and greatest of whatever widget is out this month to replace the widget from last month. Come on folks, how much packaging do we really need to fill our landfills?

If you’re so damn worried about carbon emissions… Allow next generation reactors to be built. Take a look at a documentary called Pandora’s Promise. I’m not saying base all public policy on one documentary, but stop dismissing a viable energy source out of hysteria not facts.

Here’s an idea, plant landscaping that is appropriate for your environment. Cacti are adapted to grow in the Southwest for a reason, your weeping willow and Kentucky bluegrass is not!

earthafterhumans

My point here is that we should all be less wasteful, not because it’s mandated, or because we’re terrified, or guilty, but because it simply makes good sense.

If you’re less wasteful, and adapt your habits to the natural world instead of trying to make the natural world adapt to you, things are likely to work a lot more smoothly. 

An additional perk is that climate change becomes part a natural cycle and it no longer has to be terrifying. It no longer matters if its man made or not, because we’re all by choice, making decisions that minimize our impact.

The alternative is…

For the good of the planet…

KILL YOURSELVES!


Update 6/10/2015

And once again I’m ahead of the curve.

I can’t believe that there’s actually a “Voluntary Human Extinction Movement”.


http://www.breitbart.com/london/2015/06/10/wipe-out-humans-to-save-the-earth-group-says/

WIPE OUT HUMANS TO SAVE THE EARTH, GROUP SAYS

Crowd

 

Human beings urgently need to wipe themselves out to avoid ecological catastrophe, the leader of the Voluntary Human Extinction Movement has claimed.

In an interview with the Big Issue magazine, Les U Knight (pseudonym assumed) said that the extinction of humanity would be a good thing for the planet and that humans need to reduce their numbers before they run out of resources.

Mr Knight, who in his day job is a substitute teacher in Portland, Oregon, said that his main motivation for wanting to see the extinction of his own species was “preservation of Earth’s biosphere”.

“Diversity is the strength of the biosphere and the fewer species there are, the weaker it becomes. We’re pulling strands from the web of life and at the same time putting more pressure on it due to our increased consumption.”

He added that increased human population was making it harder to feed the poor around the world.

“People are not doing too well. Two billion people don’t have potable water, almost a billion are experiencing food insecurity – we used to call it hunger – it’s not a pretty world for half the people on the planet and it won’t be easy to improve their lot as long as the progress is gobbled up by our increased numbers.”

One solution, Knight said, could be for the West to introduce a “one child policy” banning couples from having two or more children, as China does, although even this may not be enough.

“One is twice as good as two as far as procreation goes but our population momentum would take a while to start decreasing. In terms of energy consumption, when a North American couple stops at two, it’s about the same as an average Indian couple stopping at 30 or a Bangladeshi couple stopping at 97. At least China has done a lot to control their increase. There would be 400 million more of them today if they hadn’t instituted their policy.”

Knight followed his own logic at the age of 25 when he underwent a vasectomy. He claims he “never regretted it for a moment” and “I only wish I’d done it earlier.”

“It’s dangerous having those wigglers,” he added.

If humanity does not voluntarily wipe itself out, Knight warned, it will face “involuntary extinction”, either through ecological catastrophe or nuclear Armageddon:

“The end of humanity would be good for humanity. That seems contradictory but as we phase ourselves out, the lives of those left behind would steadily improve. And those of us who don’t exist won’t know the difference.”

Not everyone is convinced, however. Dr Kristian Niemietz of the Institute of Economic Affairs told Breitbart London: “Apparently, Les U Knight believes that his statement is incredibly profound and thought-provoking, but it is really just a slightly more extreme version of the lame old eco-miserabilism which has been the conventional wisdom among Western ‘intellectuals’ for more than a generation. Fretting about overpopulation and overconsumption will guarantee you approving nods at every dinner party, but fashionable though those run-of-the-mill greenish views may be, they are theoretically and empirically wrong.

“Over the past three decades, we have seen a spectacular decline in global poverty. If you use the World Bank’s definition of extreme poverty – having less than the equivalent of $1.25 per person per day – then as recently as in the early 1980s, over half of the world’s population were extremely poor. Today, that share has dropped to just below one fifth.

“Poverty is not ‘caused’ by overpopulation. Poverty is the natural state of mankind. Up until about two hundred years ago, virtually everybody in the world would have been poor by the World Bank’s standard. It was only then that we began to grow out of poverty; initially only in what we now call the industrialised West, and over time, more and more countries joined in.

“Malthusians like Knight have an unrealistic view of economic activity. They see human beings as akin to locusts, but human beings are not just passive consumers of whatever they happen to stumble across. We are active problem-solvers, we are innovators, and we are producers.

“For example, the reason why the world can sustain a much larger population than ever before today is that agricultural productivity has improved so massively. It could improve much further still if we dropped our childish paranoia about innovative farming techniques like GMO, and if we moved towards untrammelled worldwide free trade in agriculture.

“Population growth is irrelevant. What matters is institutions and economic incentives. Countries move out of poverty to the extent to which they adopt the basics of a functioning modern economy: the rule of law, impartial courts, and secure property rights. They also need to allow the free formation of market prices, so that prices can act as signals of scarcity, providing incentives to overcome that very scarcity. With rising prosperity, we also grow more resilient to natural disasters, and we can afford to adopt production techniques that go easier on the environment.

“If we continue on anything like the current trend, we may well come close to the eradication of poverty within our lifetime, although doomsayers like Knight will no doubt find some other ‘impending catastrophe’ to moan about.”

Follow Nick Hallett on Twitter:  or e-mail to: nhallett@breitbart.com