I’m Tired…

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So Tired… dammit I’m exhausted!

Yep, couldn’t help seeing Madeline Kahn as I thought about writing this.

I’m tired of many things. Politics, War, Afghanistan, President Obamas speachifying.

At the top of my list and also something I can control is the hate, vitriol, and drama that I let into my home.

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I’ve been a Twitter user for a long while now. I’m beginning to thing that perhaps that is at an end.

Recently, there have been several particularly nasty incidents that I’ve decided I don’t have to put up with.

First let me say, I’m conservative. I’m not Limbaugh conservative, but I do have more conservative leaning views.

I don’t like big government, I don’t think the government owes me anything more than my due (Social Security) springs to mind, and I know damn well that I’ll be whistling for that.

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That being said, I’m not automatically drinking the Republican, Democratic, Liberal, or Tea Party kool-aid.

Some of those people scare the hell out of me because they’re just as draconian in their beliefs as the Puritans. (They popped into my head because of Thanksgiving.)

I’m more of a libertarian, constitutionalist.

All I’ve ever wanted, is to be left the hell alone in my personal life and financial affairs.

For me personally the ACA is anathema to the way I’d prefer to live.

It’s representative of a government intrusion into my personal affairs that I’d prefer not to have.

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I’ve begun over the past decade or so to believe that the government has become too large and unwieldy to provide the primary services it was designed to.

Our government on both a federal and state level has become so intrusive in our daily lives that I chafe because I fear the loss of freedom that comes with each new regulation, regardless of whether the regulation or rule actually makes sense.

I don’t believe you can regulate common sense any more than morality. From the beginning it was obvious, prohibition wasn’t ever going to work stopping folks from getting drunk. Or the drug war, or “Just say No.”

As an example of intrusiveness on the part of government run amok, it’s no longer permissible to smoke in your condo in a Northern California town.

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Yes! this is a Condominium that you OWN, pay taxes on, and a homeowners association fee monthly.

It seems that smoking on your own property is now forbidden because some smoke may at some point waft through a wall (god I hope not) and potentially harm a neighbor.

Were I in that town, I’d lobby for a ban or curry foods, microwaving fish, and kimchi too.

I find all of these offensive. Am I not allowed to demand protection for my sinuses?

The question for me is; where reasonably do my rights begin and end?

When I see the government either federal, state, or local, feeling that they have the right to extend their power into my home I become very concerned.

To me, this represents a fundamental lost of my freedom as a human being. What happened to fundamental concepts like life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness?

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How about this? Schools fining parents because the lunch a parent sent to school for their child was’t “Nutritionally acceptable”. Then the child is given additional foodstuffs to make up the perceived lack of nutritional value.

Yes, this is happening now and I believe we’ve lost our damn minds!

Who at the school is to say that the food left out of a lunch wasn’t part of a medical issue? The school feeling that they have the right to fine a parent as punishment for not feeding their kid correctly is completely off the charts.

The other side of the coin is also happening. Parents are being punished, as are their children for having too much food. In our headlong charge to prevent childhood obesity, some schools have implemented rules about snacks.

What these rules overlook is sports.

I, as a teen couldn’t get enough food. I ran on the track team, and walked or rode a bike everywhere in the town of Lexington.

I walked in the snow, and rain or shine. I liked walking. I loved being on the track and cross country teams…

I was also always starving! Not because my parents weren’t feeding me, the food bill was astronomical.

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I was hungry all the time because my body was growing, and at the same time I was burning a ton of calories each and every day.

The day I topped 120 pounds I was amazed, I was also a senior in High School.

It’s hard to be fat when your caloric burn rate is off the charts.

But if I were in some of the “calorie regulated” the schools of today, doing all that I was doing then, I’d be unhealthy. Thin, isn’t always a sign of health.

That unhealthiness would be a direct result of a school policy that sought to enforce a restriction on my nutritional intake.

As a kid, I’d not even have been able to recognize the danger until my body shut down in the middle of a meet. And what about the damage done by malnutrition as I trained to win?

What ever happened to teaching kids personal responsibility? Or, for that matter Phys Ed? All the so called affronts to our self esteem are in fact learning situations. Lots of those lessons are taught not in the classroom, but in the schoolyard.

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You’re not always going to be the strongest, fastest, smartest, or the best.

That’s LIFE!

Knowing that simple truth provides a balance to me and my personal philosophies. This knowledge allows me to deal with most situations.

Mind you, I might not be happy about it, but I know how to deal.

Why do we insist on giving children completely unrealistic expectations? How about lessons on losing with grace and honor?


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Liberty and Freedom aren’t just abstract concepts to me. I want nothing more than to live and breath those concepts.

So long as I’m not harming anyone, It is up to me to decide how best to live my life.

By extension, were I a parent, it would be MY call on what was best for MY child.

I deeply resent anyone who seeks to impose their will or belief structures on me. Note, I said belief structures…

You see, that leads to religion.

An Atheist, Dowist, Catholic, Satanist, Jew, or any other religious practitioner is granted the right to pursue their beliefs by the constitution.

At the same time, these folks are not permitted to force me to accept and practice their beliefs.

Yet, all around us we have people imposing their will on others not out of fact, but out of dogmatic belief.

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What is the difference between the belief of a religion… and the dogmatic adherence to unproven philosophies that are ostensibly to protect us all?

I could make the argument my decision to convert all nonbelievers to Christ for the betterment of their eternal souls. You know, for their own good… Is not only right… but necessary because I know best what they need to be happy!

That would be wrong, and it’s already been done. A little tea party called the Inquisition, which may have led to a certain explorer finding the North American continent… again.

Back to the Twitter incidents.

Increasingly, discussions about current events are interrupted by people who, uninvited, start ramming their dogmatic beliefs down everyone else’s throats.

This happens on almost every subject and typically ends, only when the original topic of conversation is abandoned.

So called “Liberals” are to my mind, the worst offenders.

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Whether it be in defense of the ACA while people are commiserating about the loss of their insurance and inability to access exchanges or obtain subsidies.

On the more vicious, hateful, strident calls, for more gun control interjected in a conversation about steel versus lead ammunition.

The result is always the same.

The original conversant says “Uh, please leave, we’re not talking about that here.”
The intruder replies “Fuck you, you stupid tea party moron.”
Original conversant “ Look, I didn’t swear at you or call you names, I’m trying to tell my friend how to adapt to steel ammunition in hunting ducks.”
Intruder “Fucking animal! you should shoot yourself instead of the ducks.”
Original conversant “Ok, hey @myfriend, I’ll talk to you later, DM your email address.”
Intruder “Yeah you run you fucking tea party gun nut, I hope your kid shoots your dick off!”

And then the thread dies.

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It’s sad because I and I’m sure others, would have enjoyed gaining the perspective of someone who had made the transition for lead shot to steel shot.

Several weeks ago I muted someone in Twitter. I’d, up to that point, never muted anyone.

I can’t help but feel that everyone is entitled to the same freedom of expression I am. That being said, I rarely jump into a conversation unless I know one or more of the parties involved.

The guy I muted is someone that I’ve spoken with and whose comments I usually enjoy.

However, he went so far over several lines of politeness and decorum that I felt I had no choice but to silence him before he said something that I would really find offensive.

Incidents have been occurring with increasing frequency and outright hatred, over the past month or so.

In each one, even if I’m not speaking I’ve found myself offended and with no desire to read any further comments from any of the parties.

I can say the “evil bastard conservatives” typically don’t resort to obscenities during a heated discussion.

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The Liberals on the other hand should have their mouths washed out with soap.

Last night for example, I was repeatedly called a moron, idiot, and tea party asshole.

This verbal abuse came from a woman who would never have taken that kind of verbal abuse from me. She inserted herself in the conversation calling me an idiot in her very first tweet.

All I said was “We lose our health insurance so that we may become dependent on the government.” To a friend of mine who’d just gotten his insurance cancellation notice.

He thought it was funny, gallows humor but funny nonetheless.

I meant it somewhat tongue in cheek but with a sting. If in fact you require a subsidy to pay for your health insurance you are by default dependent on the government.

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Apparently, at least according to this “Lady” (Grand inquisitor more like) that made me an idiot.

She repeatedly told us all that the government didn’t pay for insurance.

Really? If you get a 100% subsidy the government is picking up the tab aren’t they?

I tried to get her to explain her position. Thats when she called me a moron, and we went down hill from there.

Somewhere in the middle of her hate ridden tirade against everyone who even questioned the policies of St Barak Obama I realized that by accessing Twitter, I’d willingly let this bitch into my home.

Before you ask, No, at no time did I call her any names… I thought it. I thought it a lot, but I didn’t call her anything that sprang to mind.

With that knowledge came this, I could in fact, throw her out just as easily.

I closed Twitter and took a deep breath.

My first inclination was to kill the Twitter account too.

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I slept on it.

I’ve decided that I’ll keep the account, instead of killing the account, I am going on hiatus for a few weeks.

You see, on the one hand, I feel like I’m inviting all the hate, and vitriol the liberals, and any other nutjob can spew into my home.

On the other hand if I fold my tent and simply don’t participate, these spewing fountains of sewage will appear to represent the majority of America.

This is, I believe how the Republican party came to be regarded so poorly.

Twitter Hiatus

The moderates got tired of fighting the ultra right (or left)  nutjobs, and they simply stopped engaging.

After all, as a responsible person I know I can turn off the TV, the computer, or anything else that bugs me and my day will progress quite nicely.

Most moderates understand this and exercise the option often.

However by doing that, we the moderates, abdicate our control to the sewage spewing nuts on either side of the political divide.

That, my brothers and sisters is why we the moderates must fight on.

We must not be silenced, we must not allow ourselves to be lumped into a group.

We must speak, politely, firmly, and honestly.

If we don’t, we’ll all end up ordering tofu tacos from an approved government vendor and only be allowed to have 90 calories per meal.

And it will all be “For our own good”

 

Lies! more Lies!

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I wasn’t going to comment any more on this Obamacare debacle but each day there are yet more revelations that just cannot be allowed to pass.

In addition, yesterday I got the letter I’ve been waiting for.

My other half got a similar letter last week describing that their group policy was being cancelled as well. We’re both scrambling to figure out if it’s better for us to have separate policies or to combine our coverage.

Apparently, our insurance policies are so called “Crap” policies according to wondrous Obamacare.

I’ve got time until my policy is gone, and I have to figure out what to do.

I spent some time on the phone with the insurance company and I found out a couple of interesting things.

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The first is that MY PPO plan may not allow me to go to my Doctor of many many years because he’s in a different county and therefore in a different provider net called EPO.

The implication being that unless you’re very careful you could find yourself having to see only physicians, specialists, and going to hospitals that are in your county if you don’t have compatible provider networks.

I told the lady at the insurance company that if my choice was to go to my doctor OR to have insurance… I choose my doctor, I’ll pay out of pocket, insurance be damned.

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How does restricting my coverage to a specific geographical area benefit me? Would I have insurance coverage if I was traveling out of state?

I’ve written before about my preference for doctors whose First language is English.

I have vivid memories of waiting in my Kaiser hospital waiting room in Fontana believing I was having a heart attack, and not hearing a fucking word of English. NewImage

I might as well have been in a hospital in another country. Then when I finally got to see a Doctor (if that’s what he was) I couldn’t understand him due to an unbelievable and unintelligible heavy accent.

He finally called a nurse in who explained in Spanish what was going on.

My Spanish is poor at best, but since I have some scientific grounding I was able to “get” most of the medical stuff that she was talking about  because I remembered the rudimentary Latin I’d learned as a kid.

Really?

My only choice was to rely on my understanding of a dialect of Spanish that she wasn’t speaking (Mexican versus Castillian) and routing the medical jargon through a dead language?

My Kaiser plan was cancelled the very next day!

I paid out of pocket for medical care until open enrollment at my company, then I went PPO.

There are those who would say I’m racist.

I disagree! I’m about survival!

If I can’t understand what the doctors or nurses are even saying how can I possible be engaged in my medical care?

If I don’t understand their instructions how can I comply?NewImageWorse, if these folks don’t understand my complaint how the hell can they make a diagnosis?

This is still America, like it or not The Defacto spoken language is English.

I don’t think it’s racist at all for me to insist on speaking the language of my birth, the language I was taught in school, and the language printed on all the streetsigns.

I’m even less charitable when it comes to medicine. The wrong shit, taken the wrong way 

CAN KILL YOU!

Now it looks like PPO no longer has the advantages it once had.

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It looks like I’m not alone in discovering a certain “Regionality” to the coverage plans. Reports are cropping up of hospitals and doctors being excluded from networks. Ostensibly this is a cost cutting move. The reality is far more sinister.

If I’m on a Bronze plan, then presumably I’ll be limited to Bronze plan network providers. If I’m on a Gold plan, I’ll be limited to Gold plan providers.

Dollars to doughnuts those lines and restrictions will draw rather stark lines between rich & poor.

The practical application of this could mean that all the poor folks from South LA get sent to Martin Luther King Hospital, which in recent years was on the verge of being closed due to inferior care. The rich folks in the gold plan will be sent to Cedars Sinai.

You want to talk about something hideously wrong? There’s your talking point. Wasn’t Obamacare supposed to be egalitarian?

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Obamacare in it’s current implementation lends itself to government sanctioned and enforced Classism.

Taking that thought to an obscene conclusion… Obamacare could enforce and create an underclass of people for whom inferior medical care will be the norm. A “Worker Class” if you will.

The most frightening thought is that this system eventually creates a dystopian world of “haves” and “have nots”.

The “have nots” are disposable and always underperforming because their health problems will be greater in number.

They’ll be absent from their jobs more. Their survival rates after an accident will be lower than their wealthier counterparts.

Leading to elites asking, “ Why spend a lot of time or money training them, they burn out like lightbulbs and are replaced just as easily. ” 

I doubt we’ll see this in the next 10 years but what about the next 50? We already have people on both sides of the political aisle who’re telling the American people in effect “ We’re better educated than you. We know whats best for you.”  NewImage

You could argue that to some extent we have this classism now. You’d be right.

However, hospitals must take anyone in an emergency today. A person who needs specialized care, even on the lowest tier of a “Crap” insurance plan typically is allowed to go to the hospital where they can obtain the care they need.

They pay their insurance deductible and 20%, 30% or 40% of the treatment bill and that’s it. Yes there’s a financial hardship component to this system, there is no denying it.

Being OUT OF NETWORK means that even with insurance, I still have to pay 100% of the specialist bill. This is not an improvement over the current system. In fact, this is beyond reprehensible.

When someone manages to explain how this works to the poor, Obamacare and the presidency of Obama will be over. The Presidents already low approval ratings could well drop to zero (That would be interesting to see from a historic perspective.) Any Republicans or Libertarians reading? Here’s your chance, to engage across class boundaries.

Then as I pulled at the frayed threads of the new policy offering I discovered this…

My monthly payment will probably go up, as will my deductible. My RX coverage even for Generic drugs will be reduced or eliminated.

WTF? I thought Obamacare was supposed to make insurance more affordable – not less.

I think that Obamacare will break the back of the insurance companies and the medical profession.

When the experiment is finished we’ll all be worse off than before, and Americans may well be dying in their beds from simple treatable illnesses because they can’t afford the costs of insurance AND treatment.


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Then I think about the Obamacare web site and my head explodes again.

I’ve worked in Banking, and Mortgage Insurance. We, and by “We” I mean relatively small groups of developers, testers and analysts built systems that facilitated the earning, control, or transfer of literally BILLIONS of dollars per year.

It was not uncommon for the teams I worked in, to have 4 major projects per year and those projects interacted with customers and in many cases various governmental agencies.

For someone in my position, my head explodes with each new revelation about the manner in which the Healthcare.gov website was created, If ever there was an excuse to fire a group of people this is it.

Best practices for web design and implementation are printed in books, available from Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and Apple. The first two vendors will sell you the books as a set, in hardcopy. You may not know how to code a website… but you damn sure can learn how to manage a website project.

This is not new technology, webs sites, and e-commerce sites are well understood and there are literally millions of people in this country with the correct expertise for a project like Healthcare.gov.

Many of the people with this expertise are/were unemployed!

The revelation this morning was that as much as 60% to 70% of the backend of the Obamacare site hasn’t been written.

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Screech!!! Wait! What!

Primary accounting functions, Transaction functions haven’t even been written!

So what HHS is saying, is the website that has been broken from day one… doesn’t actually connect the user to the insurers is a really useful way?

Yet to interact and shop on the site you have to enter all kinds of personal data, Then the site is incapable of taking the consumers payment information, supplying the insurer with that payment and applying the subsidy if applicable?

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What the hell? Just what have these contractors been doing for the past 3.5 years?

I know exactly what they’ve been doing…

The various contractor groups and the HHS Department have been involved in a clusterfuck of inter-office politics. No-one was in control, yet everyone thought they were top dog.

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Every one curried favor and allies and then tried to figure out who’s was bigger.

All the while saying that they were tightening budgets and hiring people who met EOE regulations even though the people they hired weren’t the best people for the job.

But there were no specifications about what the freaking website was supposed to accomplish and how.

There were probably people like me asking why? Those folks were shusshed and told that they didn’t understand the process.

There were endless reports written, powerpoint presentations given and lots of self congratulatory back slapping.

Meanwhile the specifications were too specific about irrelevant issues like the manufacturer of the resistor at location g239 on board 12 of the servers being used to host the website. And not specific enough about what the button on the screen labeled “Submit” was actually supposed to do.

The folks like me were  probably pointing out, in corporate America that heads would be rolling down the hallways.

The govt contractors and employees all just looked at them astounded. The fundamental disconnect is that for govt workers the reams and reams of paper reports that no one reads, and endless uninformative powerpoint presentations and meets ARE working. Even though these activities rarely get things done.

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The people actually doing the work were no doubt left to guess at what the government wanted, and how it was supposed to work.

Then every six months, there would be a change in direction that required the programmers and technical people to start all over again.

That’s why we have a simple website that’s all but useless.

That’s why our government has pissed through a BILLION dollars and has a site that looks like a Junior High School kid built it.

That’s why we’ll spend another billion to get it right.

Every single one of those people in government who were in control of this whole ACA (Obamacare) abortion… should be thrown out on the streets.

Set an example at the ballot box.

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Demand that your congressman take action and start firing, or impeaching, or recalling these people.

Whatever it takes it’s time to clean house and start fresh.

I can’t promise I won’t write about Obamacare again.

I’ll try not to.

Called it done…

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I finished my first book this week. No, not reading one… writing one! 

I’m sure there will be some suggestions for edits. My Editor is likely to catch my most heinous gaffes. Which means I’ll reopen and edit it a bit. But I’ve closed the book on … the book. Nothing more than edits, no more “Creation”

I realized that I’d written past the end of the book and was in fact writing a second book. That allowed me to reevaluate, and remember I wasn’t writing War & Peace.  

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This book is designed as adult entertainment, it’s one handed fiction / romance, for a gay audience. The book only needed characters that you liked or might grow to like and a setting that made you curious about the rest of the world that was rattling around in my head.

Yes, I have other threads to wrap up. However, because I’m no longer trying to fit 20 pounds of ideas into a 5 pound book. My creativity is flowing once again. That’s nice because for a while I wondered if my creativity had died on this “death march” of authorship.

I’m taking a month off from writing books. The plan is to begin a second book in Jan. 

I still don’t know what I’m doing, but I feel somewhat compelled to finish the whole story.

Next goal is to figure out how to get my first ugly baby published. I’m leaning more toward indie, or self publishing. Yeah, I’m a dirty capitalist… what of it?

Daddy needs a new set of brakes!

 

 

Grounds!

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My morning routine is fairly simple.

Get up, go pee, pull on sweats, go to kitchen, down required pills, put coffee in Keurig, put coffee cup on platform, press button start Keurig, check alarm, grab jacket, find shoes, dance around dancing dogs, open door,  walk downstairs, dogs follow, they pee or poo, head back upstairs, grab coffee, wake computer & begin reading news.

It’s usually at some point coming back up stairs that I’m more or less awake. There are slight variations in the process but for the most part what I’ve described is the first 5 minutes of consciousness for me.

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Then there are the mornings like this one… A morning where a Rube Goldbergian process takes place leading to undesired results.

I cleaned the area around the coffee machine last night. This resulted in the coffee machine being slightly more under the cabinet than usual. This morning I put the coffee pod in the machine grabbed the handle to lock it in the machine and my hand bounced off the cabinet. Not a big deal except that the coffee pod wasn’t fully seated I pulled the handle down but my hand was hurting so the feedback wasn’t quite right and I didn’t notice the problem.

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The Keurig punctured the pod in the wrong spot. Since the handle wouldn’t close I let go, then the pod slipped into place and when I tried the handle again everything was normal.

I put the cup on the platform, pushed the button, and went outside with the dogs. 

When I came back my cup was half full and there were coffee grounds in it, on the catch basin, and down the front of the machine.

OK I’m Awake! 

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Coffee?!? DELAYED! Arrrrhhhhhhggggg!

1/2 hour of cleaning the coffee machine. Then I glance at the clock and realize I’ve overslept by about 1 hour. Damn!

My morning is not going well.

What’s this? President Obama saying if I like my insurance I can keep it?

OHHHHHH! I’m having a dream.

Wait. What? If I’m having a dream why does my hand still hurt?

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So the President really is on TV and now he’s saying that HE will allow our old insurance policies to remain in force. 

Wait, isn’t that a violation of the law? Doesn’t Congress have to vote on that? I don’t think the President has those kind of powers.

This must be a dream…

President Obama who’s supposed to be a constitutional law professor knows better!

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Ok I want to wake up now…

Please It’s time to wake up…

CRAP! 

This is reality… well then I’ll just have to “kick on” won’t I.

Remember these guys?

I wrote a month or two ago about the local tarantulas.

At the time I said there were two varieties indigenous to this area. Don’t ask me to be all that specific about the phylum, species, and all that. It’s been way too long since I had to even think about it. 

The nail in my Phylum, Species information came when an Asian coworker pointed out that many birds are called different species when only their plumage was a different color and perhaps beaks were slightly different.

My co worker went on to point out that the birds could in some cases cross mate and their diets were identical. This coworker made the same points about fish.

Then came the coup de gras. 

Why, my co worker asked, don’t we apply the same rules to people?

TILT! “Danger Will Robinson!, Danger!”, “Illogical, Illogical, Norman, please coordinate”

All That hard work, from Mrs Vincent, Mrs Sharp… Undone in a moment!


Anyhow… I managed to get a photo of the Blond Tarantula. So here is my matching set for your enjoyment.

The first little beastie, the Black Tarantula (Aphonopelma reversum) I photographed in late August.

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The second beastie, the Blond Tarantula (Aphonopelma chalcodes). I photographed a couple of days ago.

As you can see they really do look quite a bit different.

My next door neighbor came and got me when they saw blondie hiking across the street. I took several pictures of the spider as he crossed my driveway. This one was also a lot more timid than the black tarantula.

I don’t think this guy was quite sexually mature, since he doesn’t have the “hooks” on his front legs. He’s also significantly smaller than the black tarantula in the photo to the left. You can’t really tell because there is no scale in the photos. Just take my word for it. That may have accounted for the timidness.

20 years here and I’d only seen one indigenous tarantula here. Now in one year I’ve seen both types. How cool is that?