Category: Frustration

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For the first time in a very long while…

I’m actively considering downgrading from an Apple update.

IOS 26 is pretty on my phone. It’s also pretty on my watch. But it’s very annoying.

Notifications half the time don’t show up on either my watch or my phone. Sometimes on one but not on the other, and sometimes on both. There’s no rhyme or reason to it.

I’ve checked and rechecked the settings and all the troubleshooting steps I can think of, and those suggested by Apple. Even turning off the “New” features doesn’t help.

How they could fuck up something that worked so well, is beyond me. I mean phone calls, and messages from known contacts not ringing? REALLY? That’s kind of basic stuff.

Thing is, it’s not any glaring “This is IT,” issue. It’s death by a thousand cuts. It’s little things.

For example, when starting a workout on my watch. In IOS18 I’d hit the action button on my ultra, that would take me to a list of workouts I’d done in the past. It was logically sorted by most frequent. I could tap the workout I was going to do and be off.

Now, hitting the action button takes me to the last workout I did. FULL SCREEN, No list, with a “Play” button.

If I want to select something else, I’ve got to roll the crown to see other selections.

They added an un-necessary complication to the process. The previous way was clean, direct, and simple.

It’s a minor thing, but it’s annoying. Then on the phone side you’ve got live activities which is fine and maybe even useful. But if you open the fitness app even after you’ve completed a workout and stopped it using the watch, there’s a screen showing the summary of that completed workout with a green check in the upper right hand corner.

Okay, but what I wanted out of the fitness app was something completely different, and now I’m forced to press the green checkmark to get to the underlying data screens in the fitness app.

Again another unnecessary step.

The whole of the OS is filled with extra, unnecessary steps that make working with my phone like answering 50 questions at a damn gas pump.

I just want gas! Take my money and turn on the fucking pump!

I’m not having a battery drain issue with my phone as so many others are, Because I’m not using it. Really, I’ve noticed I’m going to my computer for even the slightest bit of information.

Maybe this is just settling in stuff. Maybe I’ll get used to it. But I don’t need an interrogation from a device that is supposed to be my assistant, every time I interact with it.

Maybe this is just the age we live in.

Even researching the roll back process is annoying. I entered a search on how to roll back then found an article from Macobserver, fine. I tapped on the link, then Macobserver wanted age verification. WHAT? Then they wanted me to click on a check box the proved I was human. Then cloudflare pops up with a “Verifying” dialog and I still hadn’t gotten to the fucking article.

Why does everything have to be so complicated? I bailed on their page and made a different selection. Even then I was pounded with cookie notifications, an AI chat box to help answer my question, a Google login prompt, and some EU notification. ALL OF WHICH prevented me from reading a text article related to the question I asked. I couldn’t even see the title of the article to verify if it was what I actually wanted.

I bailed on that page, and went to the next listing in line. Finally! There was an article describing the process without all the bullshit!

Maybe I’m just cross.

Then again, maybe I’m just sick of bullshit at every turn of my existence.

It looks like downgrading from IOS 26, while possible, has a rather high risk of fucking up my phone, and data. I’ll have to reach a much higher level of annoyance before I undertake that project.

It’s got me thinking though.

I’m convinced that dumping the web hosting and this blog entirely, is in fact the right thing for me to do. It’s become such a headache I’m not interested anymore.

Between endless demands from the EU regulators to verify the owner and contact information on every single web domain, and them telling me that they’re implementing new rules to protect the delicate sensibilities of their members. I’m over it.

Gee Thanks Obama! You fucking moron! Turning over the domain registration to the EU was a fucking brilliant idea!

Well, the internet was a good idea, while it lasted…

I wonder if I can still get a print version of Encyclopedia Britannica? Why yes… it’s 2K on Amazon.

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You know, I’ve been too nice, too respectful, and put up with more than my share of absolute shit!

I guess I was, and still am, in a “Mood“.

For the past 12 weeks the old guy next door has been working in his yard. That’s fine, it makes him happy, more power to him.

When he started, he’d be playing music, and if I listened real carefully I could hear snippets of the tunes. We all have our windows open and honestly it didn’t bother me. Just background noise nothing to it.

Over time, the volume has increased. Over the past 4-5 weeks it’s gotten to the point that he’s turning it up so he can hear it over his gas powered leaf blower. As an aside he cranks the damn leaf blower up and uses it in his “mostly dirt” back yard. So those of us around him spend all our time fucking dusting our houses.

It’s like painting the San Francisco bridge. I no sooner get the house clean and then “Burrrrrrrrrrrrrr Burrrrr Blaat Burrr” & I’ve got a dust storm blowing through the house again.

But he’s not the only one. The Mexicans up at the top of the canyon almost every weekend blast mariachi music nightly until 10:30. They only stop because if they’re blasting it after that, someone calls the cops and they get another ticket.

The old guy across the street smokes his rancid pot that wafts all over the neighborhood while playing some of the worst recordings and/or worst rock bands of the 60’s & 70’s, also at deafening volume.

Typically, I can’t sit in my own living room and watch a movie anymore. Forget a film where the actors are British, often their character’s accents are unintelligible if there’s a lot of background sounds, either from the soundtrack or from the external Cacophony provided by my ever so courteous neighbors.

Honestly, I’ve given up trying to enjoy anything because no matter when I sit down to watch something, within minutes there’s “Aie yi yiaaaa” or some really shitty “B” side track from Deep Purple.

I guess yesterday, I reached a breaking point.

Normally I keep my TV and music volume pretty damn low. I don’t think it’s polite for me to disrupt other peoples lives. I don’t run my yard tools until typically about 10 in the morning.

I try very hard to keep my shit from interfering with other people’s shit. I don’t cause trouble, I don’t tell people to turn their shit down, or call the cops. I thought I was just being a decent human being and eventually these people turn their shit off or down and I’m fine.

But you know what? The more you don’t say shit, the worse people behave. The more inconsiderate they become. Nobody cares, that you’re not fucking up their evening. They never think that they’re fucking up someone else’s evening, day, afternoon, or whatever.

They just assume their music, or drunken shouting, echoing down the canyon is something everybody wants to hear.

Guess what? It’s not!

So, right on cue yesterday, I’d made myself lunch, turned on the TV to watch a football game, and… Music from the guy’s back yard so loud it was like it was coming from my TV in my living room. To top it off, the fucking leaf blower too, kicking up dust blowing straight into my house.

FUCK!!!!

Okay, so I’m not going to be able to watch the game. Fine, I’ll do other shit that needs to get done. But I’m going to play some music…

From every set of speakers in the house. And I’m going to play it loud enough that I can run the vacuum and do anything else I need to do. This house is going to rock like Studio 54 on a Saturday night.

And the playlist? Ohhh That’s easy! A collection of very angry fight songs that are not censored. This is a playlist that I put together to help keep me going after Jerry died. The songs are angry, full of rage, and pretty much expressed what I was feeling at the time. They’re dark, and some are downright hostile.

Watch, some prissy fuck will call the cops and accuse me of “Hate Speech”.

They’re kind of fitting after the last week. Two people butchered. Democrats telling us to calm down and tone down the rhetoric. Trans fucks celebrating death, others whining about losing their jobs because they were stupid enough to go on TikTok a video their gleeful hatred of Charlie Kirk and anyone else they disagree with. Then trying to hide behind the 1st amendment when their employers cut them loose. Oh boo hoo.

Yet more people saying Stephen King shouldn’t be canceled for his hateful spew, followed by a pussy assed “Apology”.

Nancy Pelosi raising funds to pay for the California redistricting to deprive all of us of representation. Office Depot libtards refusing to print a poster of Charlie Kirk that had no message other than his name, DOB and Date he died. After it was paid for! (Those “loads their mothers should’ve swallowed”, have since been fired.) California democrats refusing an invitation from the GOP to attend a Kirk vigil “Because he was fascist” thereby continuing to spew vomitous vitriol against a man that simply debated university students. 

BUT at the same damn time they’re telling right leaning people or conservatives that we’re wrong for being righteously angry Kirk was shot & killed by some brainwashed maladjusted queer kid poisoned with years of leftist bullshit.

As my china rattled, and the whole neighborhood heard my music. Raw, angry, unashamed, and disruptive. It occurred to me that I’m still really PISSED OFF. About a lot of things!

Absolutely nothing that’s happened in the past 6 years to me personally, and the country in general, is acceptable. But those of us on the right, or more conservative types have been told we’re the worst scum for disagreeing of asking questions.

This is me reaching my fucking breaking point! I and others like me have been silent for too long.

It’s time for us to get loud.

By the way, Apple HomePods have got some range of volume. I think I’ll be putting the Mini’s out on the decks when I’m working from here on out. Since it appears the object of the game is to annoy the neighborhood… I’ll play by their rules.

Linkin Park, Korn, NIN, and peppered in I’ll throw in some death metal. Maybe I’ll find some tolerable white supremacist shit just to really piss off the pussy democrats that live all around me.

Let one of them try to give me the least bit of shit.

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Well, my Number is 2 out of 5

2 out of 5 Times for something to work is apparently enough to keep me trying.

There’s a Shell filling station nearby in Phelan.

3 out of 5 times their pay at the pumps systems aren’t working. It’s always the same shit. “We have to reset the pump” Well if you have to reset the pump then why don’t you do it once an hour since apparently this is an ongoing issue.

Nobody knows how hard I work to keep from being an angry bitter old man just like one of my grandfathers, or one neighbor who is literally pissed off more than he is not.

It’s an effort to not go down that road.

I’m a cynic, easily annoyed, easily cranky, and generally don’t like people en mass.

Put all of those things together and it’s a recipe for a supervillain.

Except in my case I don’t have super powers so I’d just be a frustrated un-supervillain. Probably more like Dr. Evil.

I’m really tired of thing after thing, system after system, & service after service failing because people aren’t doing their jobs. What’s even worse about it is that most of these so called “Jobs” don’t require a lot of brain power, they just require that the person does as instructed.

Today, this gas station thing pissed me off perhaps a bit more than usual because they’re sitting there explaining, “We just need to reset the pump. It’ll only take a few minutes. “

I could see their display was flashing red on several pumps. Obviously all of those pumps needed attention.

So why were these idiots saying “Bro” and joking around then chatting with the customers and each other instead of doing their job. OR how about taking the pumps completely offline so they’re non responsive?

That’s what frustrated the hell out of me, The damn thing looked and acted like it was working but then told me that it couldn’t read the card. After 3 tries where I entered the rewards information only to have the transaction declined and waiting a good 20 seconds for the pump to be ready to work again I was really annoyed. It was 100° & I had groceries in the car.

What these idiots were talking about resetting is the pump’s payment processing system. So that annoyed me too. The pump was literally half assed online and was just teasing me. This is the absolute worst kind of malfunction for me. Half working shit that appears to be fully operational.

It’s not just the gas pumps. It’s literally services at every point of my contact with the world today.

I’m astounded just how much has changed in such a short period of time. Just since 2019 everything seems to have gone nuts and nothing is as it was, or stable for that matter.

I wonder if the craziness is a response to the sudden changes. Everyone is struggling to adapt and as a result folks are short tempered and easily provoked.

I hope that things settle soon.

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Ya know… Sometimes I can’t catch a break!

Doing laundry, you’d think would be a straightforward and simple task.

Laundry bottle.jpg.HA!  You’d be WRONG!

In a Rube Goldberg series of events. I found myself reaching down into the abyss behind the washing machine. Why? To retrieve my laundry detergent of course!

How did my laundry detergent end up behind the washing machine? Oh let me tell you a story but you’re not going to believe it. I was standing right there, watched the whole thing, and I couldn’t believe it. Although what I saw lends credence to one of two theories I’ve had for quite some time.

The Theories are: 1, God hates me. 2, we are living in a simulation and there are times when the simulation glitches.

I’d just moved wet clothes to the dryer, put some dirty clothes into the washer, and reached for the laundry soap. It’s a mid sized bottle of liquid and is mostly full so it’s got some weight to it.

Somehow my hand connected with the handle of the bottle, slipped off, knocked the bottle sideways, where it bounced, skidded directly to the back of the washing machine, then righted itself, & slipped like bugs bunny into the impossibly narrow gap between the wall and the washing machine. 

The only thing it didn’t do was make the silly “Zip” noise as it disappeared into the abyss. It did however make a good “Thump” as it hit the floor behind the washer.

I understand kinetics and weird physics. I also understand that all energy degrades toward a zero state. Somehow, the bottle of detergent instead of bleeding energy towards stillness, looked like it was pulling energy from space time in some bizarre way.

I wonder if unbeknownst to me, the odd sock wormhole was open behind the washer or dryer at the time?

For a moment I honestly considered leaving the bottle right where it ended up, and going to the grocery store for a new bottle.

It wasn’t so much laziness as wondering if the bottle was somehow cursed. I decided ironically “Cursed be damned” and set about retrieving the bottle.

Alas, like the T-Rex my arms were too short to just reach the bottle and hoist it up. I was however able to barely get my fingertips around the very top of the bottle, but could not get a good enough grip on the slick plastic to lift the weight. In other words, just enough to tease me.

Reaching into my Primate Heritage I started swearing and looking around for a tool. My Marine & Navy buddies would be proud of my creative use of language to describe anatomical impossibilities.

I’d probably lose some points for swearing like that at an inanimate object. Although, had the bottle winked out of existence I’d have been fine with that too.

After several minutes with a hanger, and a pair of pliers I crawled back on top of the washer. I wedged myself back between the washer and the cabinets above it, only to have to un-wedge myself seconds later because somehow I’d managed to start the wash cycle. 

2nd attempt I discovered that the hanger would have to be folded twice to give me the strength needed for it to life the bottle without bending the hook I’d made to a straight rod.

3rd attempt becoming a contortionist I was able to hook the bottle and lift it about 6 inches, then I discovered that impossibly, the bottle was too thick to be raised any further. There is no way that the darn thing should have been able to fall all the way to the floor in the first place.

Hmmm, “God Hates me, and we live in a glitchy simulation?”

After more creative casting of curses I came upon a plan. The hanger lifting the bottle 6 inches meant that I could get my hand on the handle of the bottle and perhaps snatch that bad boy out of the abyss and back into reality.

But only if I found a way to try the hanger around something. A cabinet handle worked, the scratches on the wood can be repaired. I was successful! My laundry soap is now in this reality again, as is my missing microfiber car washing mitt.

You might have found yourself wondering why I didn’t just pull the washer away from the wall.

Valid point!

Here’s why. To do so, I’d have to remove the doors to the laundry closet, then slide the washer through a narrow opening and possibly I’d have to pull the dryer out too. In other words… 

That would have been at least a 1 hour project, since all 6 hinges on the doors would have to be removed. All I wanted to do was pour the detergent into the washer and press “Start”.

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I think I’ve been going about this all wrong… Story of my life!

What, you might ask?

Well, my answer would be pretty much everything!

It seems that I’ve been giving away my knowledge when I should have been charging for every single bit of useful information that I know.

I’ve confirmed this only recently, but have suspected it for a while now. I chose however to live in denial, comforting myself by believing that what I knew, or had to say was of little to no value.

How did I come to this epiphany? 

That’s a slightly interesting tale. I was looking at starting a podcast. In the course of that investigation I was led to the more important question of how do I monetize a podcast. After all, I’d like to earn some cash…

The easiest ways are to charge a subscription fee, or come up with some advertisers. Okay, that makes sense, but as always the devil is in the details. To monetize, you’ve apparently got to use some payment processor like Stripe, Venmo, or Square. Each of these folks take a % and often they add a flat fee too.

Some transaction processors will charge 2.9%+0.30 per credit card transaction. Wow! I should start a processing center!

If my math is correct that works out to about 0.33 per dollar. Meaning that if you charged a dollar for a subscription you’re only getting  0.67. By the way, that doesn’t account for normal taxation Federal and State which works out to about 30%. So in the end you, the person actually doing the work, end up with about 0.47 of every dollar you make.

But wait! There’s more! A podcast requires specialized hosting services, Figure around $20 a month, So before you’ve gotten your first subscription you’re already in the hole $240 just for a year of podcasting hosting services. It’s better to purchase a year than to pay month to month because that’s about 3% higher.

Some of the podcasting directories which typically are not hosting services may add even more fees. Apple for example might charge 30% if someone subscribes to your podcast via their podcast application. So that immense wealth of 0.47 you’ve made may get whittled down again to 0.17 of every dollar.

That depends on how Apple takes their 30%. I’m assuming they’re going to take it right off the top at 30% per dollar, because… They’re Apple! Then the payment processors may also take their fee on the original transaction amount and so on. I could see a scenario where the person doing to podcasting ends up losing money on subscriptions.

Amazing!

So all these podcasters absolutely have to come up with additional sources of income besides subscriptions and at the same time have to produce content that is entertaining enough that the listener count is pretty high for the podcast to be worth an advertisers time.

Don’t get me wrong, pennies add up, but as the pennies add up, so too do the taxes and fees.

I’m going to keep looking for a combination of systems that net the largest potential amount of $$ in my pocket. Now I know why some of the popular podcasts have commercials for something every 6 minutes.

This made me think, “How long have I been writing my blog?” All that time with no subscriptions, 13 -14 years? I should have been selling advertising space, and figuring a way to create more engagement. I thought it was a labor of love and that people would enjoy it on its own merit. Some have and to those loyal followers you have my profound thanks. 

I realize that Blogging, Podcasting, & Social Media engagement are all potential income streams. Now I begin to understand the difference between me & folks that have been doing these things for a while. They know or believe in their value. For them, engaging in these things are actually a business and they charge for their time one way or another.

I’ve never had that kind of faith in myself, or that what I brought to the table was worth a damn. To some degree, I think that is a function of a career in corporate America. After 20 or 30 years of shitty bosses, policies, and being ground under someone’s heel it’s tough to believe you have any value, especially when you’re thrown away on a whim in layoffs, or when you or your department are pawns between to executives settling old scores.

Corporate America’s mistreatment is not the only reason I never had faith in myself, but they sure helped cement my lack of faith in myself.

This year because of that lack of faith in myself,  I almost terminated my blog and my web hosting entirely. Part of my reasoning  was because instead of charging a reasonable fee for 3 years as they had done in years past the hosting service wanted almost $1000.00.

I’m not going to do that. I renewed for one year and am in the process of comparison shopping for a new web hosting service. The current company I’ve been using for years, maybe 13, has relocated their help services to the Philippines. They’ve made changes to the web control panels and their billing panels which have made the service far more difficult to use, and to top it all off, They’ve decided that I don’t need to see invoices or have the ability to look at past invoices.

So, the cost of my narcissism in terms of cash and annoyance to maintain has exceeded my ego’s ability to justify. That being said, I’ve got an organization that I’ve been providing hosting for, and moving my stuff and theirs would have been a Royal pain in the ass. So I’ll wait until they find a new host and someone to do their web site. I’ve got a year to plan and handle the move.

All of this kind of underscores the fundamental truth.

I have not been valuing myself. I’ve been giving away too much of myself in various forms, for free, for years.

Jerry had it all over me in that regard. He knew what to charge. He was often not charging the full price he could get, but at least he was charging more or less fairly for his services. To be fair, he’d charge more for weddings and he almost never discounted them.

He knew he was going to have to deal with a monster bride or worse, the bride’s mother! He really could take or leave a wedding. He once said that playing funerals was more satisfying because he wasn’t going to hear the deceased bitching & complaining, trying the wheedle a discount after services had been rendered, when it came time to write the check.

I saw him on multiple occasions tell a bride he was refunding the deposit because the whole wedding had become such a pain in his ass the price he was charging was insufficient. He hated outdoor weddings, especially those in the Palm Springs area. Oh, they paid pretty well, but often the bride would expect the musicians to be sitting with their instruments in the blazing sun and gusting wind blowing sheet music all over the place.

Hint to any soon to be brides… Put the musicians under an awning. Acoustic instruments don’t like sitting in scorching sun for hours. They tend to fall out of tune when heated. The musicians are also none too pleased to be sitting in formal attire usually black out in the desert sun. Jerry would say I know that it’s the Bride’s special day, but she doesn’t have to make it literally hell on earth for everyone else.

Jerry was on the verge of putting a clause in wedding contracts that charged for broken harp strings incurred at an outdoor wedding. One of the last Palm Springs weddings he played, due to the heat, humidity, and lack of awning or any shade he broke 9 strings on the big harp.

In addition to him having to remap the music in his head avoiding the notes that he couldn’t play with broken strings, while he was playing, the cost of replacement strings almost wiped out the fee he charged for the wedding.

I wish I’d had more confidence in myself. I could have learned a lot more about putting myself “out there” from Jerry. I tried to handle all the technical stuff and let him be a Musician. Now that he’s gone, I’ve got a lot of technology laying around and I’m wondering if I should sell it, or do I have enough of value to say, that putting the tech to work could turn into a profitable enterprise?

I put together a prototype podcast episode just to see if I could. I liked the result, and the one person I’ve shared it with liked the effort as a first step.

That same person has floated the question of having fun in a podcast in the flavor of the old Mystery Science Theater TV show. That show hearkened back to earlier SciFi shows on Friday Nights or Saturday Afternoons. One of the most famous was “Elvira Mistress of the Dark”

Depending on subject matter, that could be fun to do and perhaps entertaining to listen to.

I’ve got a leg up because I already own the audio tech, so if I push forward into podcasting, the investment would be pretty close to zero. Although the technology for producing voice tracks has become dirt simple and cheap. A lot of the audio gear I have laying around may be overkill now.

There are USB mics that have a shit ton of intelligence built in. If you add some decent audio processing software, it’s as simple as just having a computer, one of these mics and you’re going to produce high quality results by default.

Some of the podcasting hosts have the recording software on the server side of the equation. That means that your computer doesn’t have to be terribly powerful, all it has to be able to do is get the audio stream to the hosting server. Then all the processing is done there. Thinking about that, I suppose you could do a podcast from a dang phone with zero investment in equipment at all.

Jerry and I had been looking into “Smart” Mics. During COVID Jerry was doing a ton of Zoom sessions. He was using a borrowed USB mic to capture the harp music. Eventually, he started using the USB mic all the time because it did a fine job and could be powered by his iPad and / or his computer.

There’s one of those kinds of mics that I’ve considered. I was thinking more toward working from home and knowing that I’d have to deal with conference calls. This particular mic also works on video game consoles. Those were my original use cases. But if I were to find a suitable podcast host, subject matter, and start podcasting too. It might be a win all around.