Category: BullShit

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Ok Folks… This Ain’t Rocket Science!

angrychimp

This is one clearly destined for the annals of “how to really piss off your customer”

I’ve got someone for whom I put together a web site.

What I built is much nicer than the site they’d built using their web hosts “Web Design” package.

Honestly, the “web designer” used by their hosting site was barely functional. While it did produce a web site; Well you know the old saying about Shakespeare? The one  about 10,000 monkeys with typewriters and 1,000 years???

Lets just say what the web designer output was less than pretty. 

monkeyfangs

That my friend could make the site look decent at all is a tribute to a lot of patience and time spent on their part.

Had my friend NOT spent all that time and energy his website would have looked like a rabid, syphilitic, palsied, drunken howler monkey, on acid had cobbled together some HTML. Or the great technologist Hillary Clinton, whichever floats your boat.

But that’s not the worst of it.

confusedmonkey

See, my friend was paying for this… Where things turned due South was when we tried to upload the site I built, to his host.

Turns out that even though he “Upgraded” the web hosting service wouldn’t allow FTP access. Additionally, they provided no way at all to simply upload HTML files. He asked again, and again he upgraded his service giving them MORE money and still FTP was denied.

hillary

FTP is one of the basic underpinnings of the internet. Virtually every operating system has the ability to FTP built right in. You have to specifically block this ability. In most modern Operating Systems, FTP access is blocked by default by the manufacturer, but during installation there is usually some question about enabling it, and a couple of other things. Many average consumers answer “No” or they skip the question. This leaves the service? protocol? (I honestly forget which FTP is classified as,) turned off and thus doesn’t leave a security hole open. If the consumer find they need FTP later, they can enable it. Often, if the customer has purchased an FTP front-end package, (Something that pretties up the service) during installation of the package, FTP is enabled.

Then I tried talking to his hosting site, and WOW! What an unmitigated cluster fuck!

Gandalfclusterfuck

I could log into the site as my friend, but when I tried making changes, I was sent to another site, and another site.

I’m not just talking about different webpages here, I’m talking about entirely different web sites all of which you have to log onto independently.

I started out logging into something called OptimalWebhosting.com. But that wasn’t the real host, they were called Wild West something something.com

But they weren’t the actual web builder people, and the web builder people weren’t the security people, and at one point godaddy.com popped up performing some function.

As we tried dealing with these people it became clear that there was no single entity in absolute control of his domain name.

Since there were so many people with fingers in the pie, nailing someone down for answers, getting something fixed, or getting anyone to take responsibility for anything, proved impossible.

Famouslastwords

My friend said he was completely tired of dealing with these people.

I said, “I think I can help.”

Famous last words!

I contacted my hosting service HostGator.com.

I’ve been very happy with them and their service over the past 3 years. In that time I’ve always been able to get ahold of someone that knew a lot more about some of this stuff than I do. I’ve always closed a chat, or hung up the phone thinking, “Dang! It’s really nice to talk to folks who are on the ball and have a ‘can do’ attitude.”

So I called them, I asked if my friend’s domain could be transferred to HostGator, how much, and how long?

The answer was, “Yes we can transfer the domain, it’ll cost $20 and once we have control of the domain name it usually takes only a few hours.”

I said, “Great! Clicked on the little transfer button, entered the domain name, and told my friend to authorize the transfer when he got an email about it.”

That was almost thirty days ago.

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We went down the rabbit hole of politics, greed, stupidity, and really shitty corporate policy. 

Optimalwebhosting, A.K.A. Wild West Hosting, dragged its feet at every possible turn.

They refused to answer HostGator, they allowed transfer tokens to expire requiring that those tokens be recreated twice! They annoyed my friend and whined because he was leaving them, but wouldn’t expedite his leaving and wouldn’t correct the issue that was causing him to leave. 

They finally figured out that they wanted yet MORE money to provide FTP services that would allow him to upload a website. They also wanted to charge him by the web page!

So lets take a look at this business model shall we? 

14.95 Yearly domain registration.

75.00 Yearly hosting service using their web builder (rabid, syphilitic, palsied, drunken howler monkey, on acid, HTML code.)

25.00 to upgrade site to have more web pages. (YET MORE, rabid, syphilitic, palsied, drunken howler monkey, on acid, HTML code.)

Grand total… 114.95 to STILL have no ability to upload a custom site, and have crappy support spread across who knows how many different  companies.

Uh NO! This is not value for the money… this is death by a thousand cuts. This kind of billing structure makes you look like you’re running your business on retired or defective equipment that you’ve cobbled together out of dumpsters in Silicon Valley. 

As of today, it looks like the transfer may finally be nearing completion of ‘the domain transfer from hell’. I’m not holding my breath, I suspect that Wild West Hosting has something else up its collective sleeve. They’ve gotta have at least one more monkey wrench to toss into the works, it’s their nature.

Bottom line,

If you see Optimal Web Hosting, or Wild West Hosting offering really cheap domains and webhosting… 

RUN AWAY!

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KILL ALL HUMANS!

BenderKillallhumans

After careful consideration and study.

The inevitable conclusion is, to solve climate change we must kill all humans!

After all, the California Delta Smelt, The Wyoming Sage Grouse, The Spotted Owl, and innumerable other species deserve to live in peace with their habitats intact.

As I’m sure you’ll all agree, the only viable solution is we must all die.

To that end, extermination booths will be set up in your neighborhood. When you see the booths, be the first of your friends to step in and die with dignity. It’s quick, painless, and fun!

StarTrekATasteofArmageddon

Persons not stepping into the booths voluntarily, will be hunted down and shot.

Do Mother Earth a favor, kill yourself!

That’s what goes through my mind every single time I read about another EPA or BLM report describing the plight of some creature, in an attempt to guilt us into … WHAT?

Accepting Climate change is real? Irrelevant! 

Paying some stupid ass carbon tax? Pointless!

Turning over yet more control of our daily lives to a bunch of bureaucrats? There it is! That’s the reason for the guilt ridden landfills full of newsprint.

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I get pissed off.

Species come and go all the time on this planet. They have done since before we came down from the trees, and they’ll no doubt continue to do so long after our bones and our civilization is dust.

Stop guilting us!

If we all resolve to live taking actions daily that minimize our impact on the planet, things will get better.

Stop pumping out children that you simply throw away!

forest

That goes for you Catholics, and you folks in India too.

Stop rushing out to buy the newest latest and greatest of whatever widget is out this month to replace the widget from last month. Come on folks, how much packaging do we really need to fill our landfills?

If you’re so damn worried about carbon emissions… Allow next generation reactors to be built. Take a look at a documentary called Pandora’s Promise. I’m not saying base all public policy on one documentary, but stop dismissing a viable energy source out of hysteria not facts.

Here’s an idea, plant landscaping that is appropriate for your environment. Cacti are adapted to grow in the Southwest for a reason, your weeping willow and Kentucky bluegrass is not!

earthafterhumans

My point here is that we should all be less wasteful, not because it’s mandated, or because we’re terrified, or guilty, but because it simply makes good sense.

If you’re less wasteful, and adapt your habits to the natural world instead of trying to make the natural world adapt to you, things are likely to work a lot more smoothly. 

An additional perk is that climate change becomes part a natural cycle and it no longer has to be terrifying. It no longer matters if its man made or not, because we’re all by choice, making decisions that minimize our impact.

The alternative is…

For the good of the planet…

KILL YOURSELVES!

Update 6/10/2015

And once again I’m ahead of the curve.

I can’t believe that there’s actually a “Voluntary Human Extinction Movement”.

http://www.breitbart.com/london/2015/06/10/wipe-out-humans-to-save-the-earth-group-says/

WIPE OUT HUMANS TO SAVE THE EARTH, GROUP SAYS

Crowd

by NICK HALLETT10 Jun 2015543

 

Human beings urgently need to wipe themselves out to avoid ecological catastrophe, the leader of the Voluntary Human Extinction Movement has claimed.

In an interview with the Big Issue magazine, Les U Knight (pseudonym assumed) said that the extinction of humanity would be a good thing for the planet and that humans need to reduce their numbers before they run out of resources.

Mr Knight, who in his day job is a substitute teacher in Portland, Oregon, said that his main motivation for wanting to see the extinction of his own species was “preservation of Earth’s biosphere”.

“Diversity is the strength of the biosphere and the fewer species there are, the weaker it becomes. We’re pulling strands from the web of life and at the same time putting more pressure on it due to our increased consumption.”

He added that increased human population was making it harder to feed the poor around the world.

“People are not doing too well. Two billion people don’t have potable water, almost a billion are experiencing food insecurity – we used to call it hunger – it’s not a pretty world for half the people on the planet and it won’t be easy to improve their lot as long as the progress is gobbled up by our increased numbers.”

One solution, Knight said, could be for the West to introduce a “one child policy” banning couples from having two or more children, as China does, although even this may not be enough.

“One is twice as good as two as far as procreation goes but our population momentum would take a while to start decreasing. In terms of energy consumption, when a North American couple stops at two, it’s about the same as an average Indian couple stopping at 30 or a Bangladeshi couple stopping at 97. At least China has done a lot to control their increase. There would be 400 million more of them today if they hadn’t instituted their policy.”

Knight followed his own logic at the age of 25 when he underwent a vasectomy. He claims he “never regretted it for a moment” and “I only wish I’d done it earlier.”

“It’s dangerous having those wigglers,” he added.

If humanity does not voluntarily wipe itself out, Knight warned, it will face “involuntary extinction”, either through ecological catastrophe or nuclear Armageddon:

“The end of humanity would be good for humanity. That seems contradictory but as we phase ourselves out, the lives of those left behind would steadily improve. And those of us who don’t exist won’t know the difference.”

Not everyone is convinced, however. Dr Kristian Niemietz of the Institute of Economic Affairs told Breitbart London: “Apparently, Les U Knight believes that his statement is incredibly profound and thought-provoking, but it is really just a slightly more extreme version of the lame old eco-miserabilism which has been the conventional wisdom among Western ‘intellectuals’ for more than a generation. Fretting about overpopulation and overconsumption will guarantee you approving nods at every dinner party, but fashionable though those run-of-the-mill greenish views may be, they are theoretically and empirically wrong.

“Over the past three decades, we have seen a spectacular decline in global poverty. If you use the World Bank’s definition of extreme poverty – having less than the equivalent of $1.25 per person per day – then as recently as in the early 1980s, over half of the world’s population were extremely poor. Today, that share has dropped to just below one fifth.

“Poverty is not ‘caused’ by overpopulation. Poverty is the natural state of mankind. Up until about two hundred years ago, virtually everybody in the world would have been poor by the World Bank’s standard. It was only then that we began to grow out of poverty; initially only in what we now call the industrialised West, and over time, more and more countries joined in.

“Malthusians like Knight have an unrealistic view of economic activity. They see human beings as akin to locusts, but human beings are not just passive consumers of whatever they happen to stumble across. We are active problem-solvers, we are innovators, and we are producers.

“For example, the reason why the world can sustain a much larger population than ever before today is that agricultural productivity has improved so massively. It could improve much further still if we dropped our childish paranoia about innovative farming techniques like GMO, and if we moved towards untrammelled worldwide free trade in agriculture.

“Population growth is irrelevant. What matters is institutions and economic incentives. Countries move out of poverty to the extent to which they adopt the basics of a functioning modern economy: the rule of law, impartial courts, and secure property rights. They also need to allow the free formation of market prices, so that prices can act as signals of scarcity, providing incentives to overcome that very scarcity. With rising prosperity, we also grow more resilient to natural disasters, and we can afford to adopt production techniques that go easier on the environment.

“If we continue on anything like the current trend, we may well come close to the eradication of poverty within our lifetime, although doomsayers like Knight will no doubt find some other ‘impending catastrophe’ to moan about.”

Follow Nick Hallett on Twitter:  or e-mail to: nhallett@breitbart.com
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The 2nd ammendment doesn’t grant the right to bear arms…

Momsdemand1

It is supposed to insure it.

I found an interesting analysis about the 2nd amendment a few weeks ago. The analysis states that the language of the 2nd is straightforward and unambiguous.

It is assumed, according to this analysis that citizens living under the constitution inherently have the right to own arms and that right is not granted by the 2nd amendment but is protected from government interference by the 2nd amendment.

The analysis is far more detailed and can be read in its entirety here.

Everytown1

So without thinking about it too much, I sent the link to an acquaintance on Twitter.

He was, as always embattled with one of the gun control advocates from one of the groups like Moms Demand Action, or Everytown for Gun safety. This analysis made his point and he sent it to the gun grabbers.

Progressives

I’m always surprised by the nasty comments from the gun control crowd. For an “enlightened”, “Progressive”, “Well Educated”, group, you’d think their vocabulary would have a bit more depth.

Nonetheless it got me thinking about the logic the gun control folks are using.

USConstitution

Some of the gun control people absolutely believe that guns should be removed from the hands of people because of the harm some guns might cause.

That led me to this thought;

“By their logic, I could advocate bringing back Eugenics Laws because one of their descendants might be responsible for killing a bunch of people.”

Their logic is just as flawed about guns as mine is about descendants.

You can’t know a gun is going to hurt someone any more than you can know a descendant is going to be a criminal.

Eugenics1

There is no family on the planet that doesn’t have at least one criminal in the family tree and no family is immune from producing criminals.

I could as easily make the case that preventing people from breeding is likely to be equally beneficial to society and the planet in the long term, as removing guns.

After all, fewer people sucking up resources burning fossil fuel, etc. would be better long term to combat global warming.

I’ve considered invoking the Zardoz paradigm where the primitives were given guns so that they’d war amongst themselves thereby keeping their numbers manageable.

Eugenics2

I don’t think that would add anything useful to the debate other than to offend the fem-nazis by forcing them to view a half naked, hairy, violent, Sean Connery.

Humm… Might be worth it after all!

I wonder all the time, why the “Moms Demand” and “Everytown” groups aren’t also teaching gun safety. I believe that there are too many guns to confiscate, even if I believed that line of illogic. I believe instead, that teaching children gun safety would save more lives.

I absolutely believe the fewer people in the general population who have knowledge about proper handling of, and behavior around guns; the more likely gun accidents become.

Zardoz1

For me its simply pragmatic. If you teach gun safety you can’t go wrong.

The educated gun control folks reject that kind of education. These are the same people that seem content with censoring other knowledge as well.

These folks are content with not teaching children via Chemistry Class about dangerous chemicals in the home. In spite of the fact that accidental poisoning is common.

They’re offended by locker room nudity, but not extremely suggestive nudity & sexuality in movies. They’ll decry playground fights as unacceptable, but will show DVD’s to their children depicting bloody fights and dismemberment.

Zardoz2

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not advocating censorship any more than I’m advocating gun control.

I just wish these groups were consistent in their logic.

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Well I’m glad that’s over!

starbucks

Now that Starbucks has ended their “Race Together” bullshit I can end my boycott of their stores.

Really, all I want is my damn cup of coffee!

I don’t care about race shit, racism, or the politics of any of it enough to pay an emotional, guilt ridden, tribute to the person making my coffee.

This is especially true when I’m paying $5 for that coffee in the first place.

My morning coffee isn’t open to discussions of any kind. Never has been, never will.

crackercup

Just serve my Damn coffee Starbucks!

 

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And we’re on high alert

NewImage

You’ve go to be kidding me!

I found out that the other half was on a list of folks to be killed by some deranged student at the school

A 15 to 16 year old apparently made a list of people that the kid wanted to kill. I guess you have to take that kind of thing seriously now days.

But really what are the odds? I guess a better question is; are we prone to over-reacting about these things and if so, why?

When I was in school, there were teachers that I harbored ill will toward. While I might have said bad things, I’d never have actually done them harm. Hell, I’d have been hard pressed to even say anything negative to them. 

NewImage

Back in the day we actually respected our elders. We knew that if we didn’t we’d be doing time in the Master bedroom with our Dad and his ohhh so thin belt cracking across our backsides!

I can say that I was never abused. I don’t recall ever being bruised by the belt or the paddle used at school. I vaguely recall having a mark where a switch landed poorly because I was running in tight little circles. But that was Grandma and her aim wasn’t all that good to begin with.

My, how times have changed!

NewImage

I’m sitting here doing the security check.

Alarm? CHECK!

Doors Secured? CHECK!

Weapons at hand? CHECK!

I keep feeling like I shouldn’t have to be concerned in the least.

It’s a pissant kid for Gods sake!

Then the other half reminds me of the violence in schools today and I go back to the security check. 

Thanks to the internet, public records, and fucking Google search… This address is associated by name with my other half.  Google will even give you directions in less than a minute.

And it’s free! Yipppeee! So much for paying the damn phone company for an unlisted number! Oh and THANKS GOOGLE!

NewImage

We’re not living in fear, we’re taking precautions as suggested by the police, and being a little less careless.

What really bugs me about this is the fact that I might be placed in a position where I have to decide to harm a dumb 15 – 16 year old kid.

That is so far out of my comfort zone I can’t even begin to explain.

I’m built to protect children, not harm them!

At 15 – 16 this kid is still a Child no matter how you slice it. God, I hope it’s just talk & the kid had time to cool down while in juvenile hall. 

If something were to happen, where I ended up defending myself or my other half with lethal force, could I live with myself? Could I live with myself if I allowed this kid to harm my other half, because I couldn’t wrap my head around a child being a threat?

There are just some questions you never want answered.