Cocktail / Dinner Party Don’ts

Discussing, politics, religion, & the family doctor at social gatherings… BIG social no-no’s!

Audrey-Hepburn-cocktail-partyI was at a dinner party the other night.  It was nice until someone assumed that everyone in the crowd would be voting for Hillary!  I corrected him, simply saying that I wasn’t. Then he called me a misogynist because I’m not on the Hillary bandwagon.  Hey, I’m not voting for Trump either!

In hindsight, since the word misogynist rolled off the guys tongue with the same venom as the word “Racist” I probably should have kept my mouth shut.

I didn’t!

I asked this person to explain their logic.  Things went down hill from there, I really need to learn how to disengage, or better yet not engage at all!
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This person explained that is was time for America to have a woman president.

He went on to justify that statement by saying European countries had elected women leaders. I asked how he could justify voting for Hillary when we know she’s lied about at least one issue of national security regarding her email server, and that the FBI is currently investigating her.

I also pointed out that if she were a man, or Republican, or a citizen like everyone in the room, she’d be out of the presidential race and likely in jail. The response was, “Hillary is better than Trump.”

“What about Fiorina,” I asked.

“She’s a Republican!”

Hillary-Clinton.pngAt which point, I pointed out that his choice of Hillary was in fact not based simply on the fact that America needed a woman president but party politics.

Then the guy tried to “WIN” the conversation by loudly asking me again if I was a misogynist and accused me of being afraid of a woman president.  I told him that I thought his attitude was based in misandry and given that he was a man I found that quite ironic.

Thinking about it… That was when I should have stopped.

He didn’t understand what I’d said, so I should have realized I was having a war of wits with and unarmed person.

The discussion, such as it was, devolved into his pronouncements that no-one should have guns and everyone in America was afraid.  I told him I thought that he was overstating the issue. Especially considering that Munich was currently on lockdown due to threats from ISIS. And that in the wake of Paris, and San Bernardino perhaps being prudent and more aware of our surroundings was not a bad idea.

His rather angry response was to tell me that being alert and aware of your surroundings, or preparing for things like fire, or earthquake, and more recently jihadi attacks, by noting things such as exits in a public place is paranoid and demonstrative of the cowardice of America.

Therefore I was paranoid and a coward. Uhhh WOW!

Justice-in-the-Form-of-a-New-Law-Served-to-PA-Crime-VictimsI pointedly asked him if he really thought it was paranoid to take just the slightest moment to note exits in case of an emergency. He responded that even if terrorists came into a restaurant shooting he’d be ok getting shot.

My brain rebooted.

In my world view  you never just lay down and die, especially not when you have options, like the ability to retreat.

DUDE-WTF-IS-WRONG-WITH-YOUI asked him to explain himself and honestly was curious about the foundations of his belief,  because that mindset is so completely Alien to me.

He started spouting circular and rhetorical talking points that led me to believe he worked for the progressive Democrat movement. After several rotations of the talking points, suddenly he threw in people don’t need to carry guns.

I said what?

Then I realized he was referring to the new Texas open carry law, and that somehow in his world view, now everyone was carrying guns all the time everywhere. I even pointed out that people exactly like him had managed to take the right of open carry away from their fellow citizens in California.

I kept asking questions and he kept parroting the progressive liberal talking points. It became very clear that he wasn’t actually thinking. I have no problem with people having differing opinions from mine, I have a real problem with people regurgitating stuff that they’ve not really thought about.

moderate-alcohol-consumption-beneficialGranted there was some alcohol involved and somewhere in my brain there was a diagnostic running that was questioning if I was drunk and being an ass.

The little boy in me said “He Started it!”

I’d decided to disengage because I was tired of making points that he tried to erase by parroting canned talking points, but being unable to discuss or expound on any of those points.

Later, It occurred to me that this person had probably never in his entire live been in a situation where they were the least bit on the edge. His world experiences were so safe or he was so oblivious, that he actually believed he was safe from everything all the time. This is a person who believes they don’t have to have an earthquake kit because the government will be there to make everything fine, instantly.

At that moment, I wasn’t able to look at this person with anything but contempt. I saw the guy as prey, a sheep, weak, and someone that I wouldn’t miss if I never saw him again. If an earthquake had happened at that exact moment, I’d have done nothing to ensure his safety. Sheep die all the time…

Things really took a turn towards the surreal when my other half told the guy he was being an ass by not allowing me or anyone else to complete a sentence without interruption.

The other half even said I wasn’t being an Ass, but that the other guy was. I began looking for signs I’d entered an alternate universe, I didn’t find any so…

Surprise Surprise Surprise! I’m not a complete asshole!

That my other half took a side like that, surprised the hell out of me

Normally I’m allowed to make an ass of myself without comment. On rare occasion I’m  told I’m being an asshole, and that I need to shut up.

In this situation apparently, my only fault was answering someone who was clearly interested in a battle of wits, they thought they’d win.

They weren’t prepared to have someone say, “Defend your opinions.”

I was really worried that the other half was pissed at me. I asked about it and was told it wasn’t me.

Church Lady isn't that specialA friend reminded me that I should have dropped to my Southern upbringing and simply avoided the whole conversation with;

“How nice” or “Bless your heart”

That’s really good advice and I’ll be taking it next time.

Diversity? Oh Really!

Brain

Sorry, just read another article about the lack of “Diversity” in technology and realized I am totally screwed! Apparently, I’ve also been way ahead of the curve because for years. To me, my coworkers have been nothing more that their intellect. I think the ultimate diversity, is for all of us to be considered nothing more than a brain.

Here is the inevitable rant!

The lack of diversity in Tech means more DIVERSITY is being demanded even though some of the “Diverse” workers may have been given their degrees as a quota filling move.  Like the Dr. from MIT (yes… a real PHD from MIT) who was my boss. That idiot couldn’t read simple sentences, much less run a department.

PinkynTheBrain

All of us used to write memos that read like Dick & Jane books.

“See the network plug”
“The network plug is different from the phone plug”
“Forcing the network plug into the phone jack is bad, it makes the network sad”
“See Sparky run…”

Of course writing like that takes time and thought so we’d get dinged on productivity.

If we didn’t write memos then we had to talk in person and that meant what should have been a 2 minute conversation ended up being an hour long conversation as we explained repeatedly the fundamental concepts of digital communications in an “adverse” environment. The idiot really had trouble understanding why you didn’t want to run ethernet cables between moving vehicles. Truly this person was the poster child for “The Peter Principal”.

BTW the issues weren’t because of being  black, they were because of stupidity, and an artificial quota system which presented a pass based on skin color instead of having the student learn things and work for the degree(s).

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The lady who taught me UNIX was also a graduate from MIT and she was freakin brilliant. She spoke all kinds of languages, had an undergraduate degree in physics, and graduate degrees in Computer Science and AI.

She was tough to deal with but we got along. I think it’s because when we were at work it was only about the truth of the data, the validity of the software, and personalities or feelings didn’t matter. She’s what I thought all MIT folks were like, until I met my former boss and the fantasy was shattered.

I know if I was hiring now, I’d be suspicious of folks and their degrees. That’s what happens when you devalue an entire educational system to bring “Equality” based on anything other that intellect.

My suspicion  is evidenced by the number of pre-interview “Tests” that hiring companies want you to take.

Einstein

Yeah, they want to test you on your knowledge before you ever speak to anyone outside of the HR department.  It’s annoying, but I get it. Degrees are like toilet paper now. Very expensive toilet paper, but toilet paper nonetheless. Everyone has one and all the degree means anymore is that you’re in debt and sat through X years in an institute of “Higher Learning,” and have a mountain of debt.

There are some very good professors who do really care about facts, and whether the student has retained the facts or not. These professors are also interested in teaching and verifying that the students can use the “facts” in new ways.

But sadly these professors are retiring at an alarming pace and many of them are glad to be doing so. The helicopter parents haven’t gone away, they’re simply plaguing a new set of educators, except now they’re holding college professors accountable for little Johnny not doing the work.

Turns out the critics & educators of 50 years ago were right, things do slip to the lowest common denominator, not the other way around.

Okaaayyy This is one of those really weird trains of thought.

imagesI was scanning the year end news. I know… BAD Idea!

Anyway,

Black Lives matter has made their presence known all over the place.

Many of the folks in the group and their leaders have been published saying stuff that paraphrased reads like “Kill the white devils!”

The Knock Out game is still being played in cities across the land. Victims are usually white. All the victims have been hospitalized and many have died. In the news rooms around the country the sound of crickets is the only sound of outrage to be heard.

If you want to see outrage, have a black person CLAIM to have been called the “N” word by an unidentified person driving by in a truck.

The President wants to import Syrian refugees, BUT Daesh has said they’re going to pepper the refugees with extremists with orders to do violence here in the states. Terrorists  are already well entrenched in the West and are not only threatening violence, but have committed horrific acts of terrorism in western countries.

Then I thought, I will not submit to EITHER of these groups. I will not bow, I will not convert. I was thinking i need to find a WHITE only country. A place where I could feel safe.

nar-sealThen it hit me.

We are well and TRULY FUCKED when the NorthWest Front starts to look good!

Section one of their proposed constitution turns me off immediately.

Yeah, I read it, and wow! There are a couple of things in their document that I actually agree with, but, and this is a big BUT so much of it sounds so very much like the Hitler’s NAZI party, that I can’t even begin to feel like they’re any kind of alternative.

There has to be something somewhere in the middle. Something between sanctioning an angry permanent victim class, and excluding people based on sexual, religious, behavioral, or racial differences.

This isn’t the country I was built to live in and I don’t want to live in a country that’s heading in the direction we appear to be going.  I thought that we’d have gotten past this kind of stuff by now.

Apparently not.

In Elder Times…

We had conversations that were civil, it wan’t uncommon to have friends with heterogeneous opinions and you could have a passionate discussion without it ending in name calling or death threats.

The primary differences were that we were face to face, we’d been taught conflict resolution, we understood that the world didn’t revolve around us or our feelings. We knew that sometimes people will say things that we don’t like, agree with, or believe, BUT that it was other folks right to say those things, just as it was our right to express ourselves freely.

These were to some extent, lessons learned in the sandbox, or when we learned to share, or when we learned that for every bully, there’s someone stronger who may or may NOT be more “Just” than the bully they took out.

Then came the internet.

And people could sit behind their screens and say some of the most horrific things imaginable. For many years those of us who understood the old ways simply did what we’d done before. We ignored people who were trying to be offensive and moved on with our lives.

On IRC (Internet Relay Chat) groups we knew where the loudmouth dunderheads were likely to be mouthing off, and where folks who were interested in conversing were likely to be hanging out.

That’s what adults do.

We make choices, we take responsibility for what we see, read or hear. We remember that there is an off switch on our televisions, radios, and computers. If something offends us, we have the ability, right, and duty to ourselves, to turn it off. One thing that happened in the IRC groups was that someone would start mouthing off in a purposely offensive way and we’d all leave the room. The person could type their offensive stuff ’till their fingers bled but we’d not be reading it. They’d try to follow us and we’d leave again. Eventually, they’d get tired and go away.

Then came ICQ. Yeah, remember that? 1996, it was pretty cool. Unfortunately within 2 to 5 years the service was overrun with spammers. “Hi there, do you like date me?

By 2010 when the service went from AOL to a Russian company I’d not been a user for 5 years or more. Even so, we’d all been able to block users and I’d blocked hundreds of spammers if not thousands. Again, taking responsibility for myself.

Facebook and Twitter had eclipsed the ICQ service long before I’d opened and closed my Facebook account.

With Facebook I got tired of ever-changing terms of service, and oversharing my information every time Facebook updated their service. I didn’t like feeling like I had to watch what was supposed to be a fun leisure program as if it contained banking information. Then Facebook added a financial component and I was gone.

I moved to Twitter.

I like a lot of the features. The following of people while stalker-ish is pretty neat and Twitter’s hash tagging and presentation of folks with similar interests to those people I’ve already followed is convenient.

Twitter and Facebook are both facing issues. The way these two businesses are trying to deal with these problems is via censorship. I think this is the wrong way to go.

Rather that allowing some very immature people to dictate via censorship what I can read because they, not I, are offended. Twitter should instead make the offensive situation a teachable moment.

I agree with the ability for me to block certain persons who are chronically offensive to me. I do not think that Twitter or Facebook should sit in judgment of content.

A prime example of why I feel this way, is the story of a 175 year old pub whose Facebook page was deleted because of the pub’s name and over sensitive arbiters of taste. The pub is called “The Black Cock Inn”. Facebook apparently decided this was racist. Uhh 175 years ago in England the most likely meaning was black cockerel (black male chicken). In all probability at the time the place was named they had a ton of black chickens running around.

“Excuse me good man, where might I find food and lodging for the night?”

“Ahh Sir, not a quarter mile from here is an inn.”

“How will I know it?”

“Sir, The yard be full of black cocks, there be one or two in the cook pot too, I’d wager.”

We really must stop looking at everything through the lens of today’s morality and start looking at things in context using the moral lens in effect at the time of an event. We should then compare and contrast the difference so that we may learn from mistakes. However we needn’t  impose guilt on today for the abuses of yesterday, we need only learn, and vow to not make the same mistake moving forward.

Imagine how we’re going to feel when we find out Whales and Dolphins are in fact as intelligent as we are and that we murdered them for food and accidentally while we were fishing without permission in their ancestral waters.

I can hardly wait to see the SJW crowd throwing themselves off the nearest pier or drowning themselves in their bathtubs wracked with guilt.

Pardon me, that was a private fantasy… I’m back now.

Twitter’s Gulag methodology is so prone to abuse that all it takes is a butt hurt person to rally a very few of their friends and BOOM, you’re blown off Twitter, for the simplest of infractions.

adam-baldwin-mouth-getty-640x480The best recent example was when Adam Baldwin had his Twitter account locked over a recent gamer gate tweet.

Mr. Baldwin used no profanity, didn’t single anyone out, and said simply that his opinion was; (I’m paraphrasing) Gamergate folk were more joyous and attractive than anti-gamergate folks.

For that Twitter suspended his account.

The problem seems to be that the progressive liberal social justice warriors, using these services don’t understand that their opinions are like assholes, everyone has one.

ChildishAt the same time, these people have enough Whine power that they are dragging what should be simply services into politics and forcing these services to choose sides when these services should be completely agnostic about race, religion, politics, and everything else.

SJW ThinkingTwitter says that they’re going to be taking on trolls in the coming year. I suspect that means it will be easier for someone with a conservative bent to have their account locked, and harder for a SJW or ISIS recruiter to get tossed off Twitter for making death threats. (Yep, it’s a common occurrence. Direct death threats, or wishing people would die, or that their families would be shot, raped, killed… you name it.)

Usually this is the end of the conversation where the SJW has been proven wrong, or called on to prove their allegations and they are either unable or unwilling to do so.

FailA.K.A. (also known as) They’ve lost the argument and been humiliated in the process. This happens quite a bit especially when the SJW insinuates themselves into a conversation then starts mouthing off about a subject on which they have little direct knowledge, and are instead parroting “what they’ve heard” from other SJWs.

Oddly, the SJW is not usually called a troll. The people called “trolls” are the folks that demand the SJW back up their assertions with facts. I consider it another example of blaming the victims but that’s another story altogether.

Since I tend to say what I mean on Twitter, I wonder how long it will be until I’m labeled a Twitter Troll and have my account locked out.

I wonder if my old IRC handle is still available…

At least there, I’m the master of my own fate.

You know… It’s still the owners Home

I read this article about AirBnB and couldn’t help thinking if I was doing the Airbnb thing;

“It’s my house and I can choose to rent a room or not to whomever I want. It’s not like I’m renting a hotel room, apartment or the entire house, on a permanent basis. That would fall under equal opportunity housing. ”

If I’m an Airbnb host I’m allowing someone into my house. I sure as hell wouldn’t let someone from Ferguson, MO, or Syria into my house. That would be just plain stupid! The risk would be unacceptably high that something bad would happen.

Then I was thinking about the Social Justice Warrior crowd, Black Lives Matter, and all the rest, and it hit me, “Shit! these fuckers are going to demand absolute equality,”

Given that, AirBNB is probably done in the US.”