Month: July 2024

Google I might add hasn’t substantially changed, improved, or added, to the Nest line of products since they took over. 

Google has however used the Nest products that I own as a gateway to insinuating themselves into my life. (For my own good, of course…)

It’s been hotter than Hell up in my little mountain town for the past week or so, and it will continue to be hotter than Hell for the next week or so. This heat wave isn’t abnormal except that it’s about 2 months early.

This means that I’m running the A/C and while I hate to use A/C I’m not opposed to turning it on when we get above 90°

Every single year, when I start running the A/C and again when I start running the Heat, Google in their infinite wisdom dicks with my settings.

For example, this morning as the temperature crossed the 80° mark, I closed the doors and windows to the house and set the thermostat to “Cool”.

The Thermostat responded by telling me “Cooling set to 82°” uh nope! That’s not what you’re set to do They/Them Thermostat. (I figured I’d have some fun since my thermostat is now behaving like an asshole.) You’re set to Cool the house to 79° regardless of time, or day. 

I know this because I personally lobotomized your schedules the last time we did this dance, and I turned off your settings to accept changes to my schedules from Google. 

So I try to get to www.nest.com to verify that the web hasn’t pushed some kind of software change to the thermostat. Oh, but that URL now redirects me to a google shopping site and logs me in using a google account created to use Google voice, and does not present me with the website that allowed me to inspect and modify the schedules using a full screen and real keyboard.

Instead I’m presented with all the various google products that I can purchase, however Nest products are not listed prominently. They’re buried under smart home and because Google has logged me in using the Voice account, and I haven’t wanted to link, or create, or whatever other bullshit Google wanted me to do with my nice functional Nest.com login I can’t get to the UI that I want to get to.

One of the reasons I freaking HATE GOOGLE! I swear these people could Un-fuck a wet dream (yeah, think about that one…)

I shift over to the Nest app running on my phone. I’m able to see the schedule and indeed Google, in some software update, reset the switch that tells the thermostat “DO NOT ACCEPT GOOGLE INPUT” for schedules back to “off”.

Of course I want a multibillion dollar company monitoring my coming and going and controlling how I choose to spend my money on my local environment in my own home.

I’ll tell you what Google, when you start writing the checks for the mortgage and the utilities then you’ll have some input. Until then, in the words of Elon Musk, “Go Fuck Yourself!“

After another frustrating half hour undoing their scheduling via the phone app, where at least 1/2 the buttons don’t work as expected and none of them light up, change color or give any indication that they’ve been pressed. Plus because the app is running on an iPhone instead of an android phone, Google refuses to have all of the controls on the visible screen.

Which is why I use, or rather, used to use, the nest.com interface.

The dog, sensing my frustration sat next to me and gently made me lower the arm I was holding the phone with. It was, in his opinion time for me to look up, and he was right.

5 or 10 minutes of cuddling and his laughing face did wonders for my outlook.

During the playtime I realized, this is probably the last time I’ll have to fight with Google altering the temperature schedule in my house.

This is a true statement because regardless of my keeping or selling this house the nest devices are due for replacement and they will not be replaced with more nest devices.

The nest protects will reach end of life next year and if I replace them with another manufacturers products there will be no need to keep the Nest Thermostat either.

Before Google bought Nest. I’d standardized on the Thermostat and Protect fire alarms because in the event of fire, the Protects can shut the air handler down via the thermostat to prevent the system from spreading smoke throughout the house.

I also like that the Protects have a nightlight feature and use color coded light signals to indicate their operational status. Mostly, I liked being able to shut them up if they warned they were about to go  off because of smoke from the kitchen.

Then Google bought Nest and honestly… they haven’t done shit to enhance the products.

I look forward to the day when I can reset the Nest Products and delete the Nest app from my phone. On that day I’ll delete any remaining Google logins and do my level best to never use their crap again.

Heck, I might go find myself an old Honeywell lever thermostat with mercury bulbs inside, and eschew all this smart home nonsense entirely.

I’ve tried it, I’ve got the T-Shirt and while there are a lot of aspects I really like, the level of complexity and flaky behavior might just outweigh the benefits.

I suspect if/when I sell this house, and while I’m living someplace I’m renting that I’ll be able to make a reasonable evaluation on the benefits of smart home versus dumb home. 

Maybe I’ll choose a “Low IQ” home. Where nothing important can be controlled by any outside force.

(Then my home and I would match. I’m apparently a Low IQ voter, since I didn’t vote for Hillary. I’ll probably be living in a flyover state too. From a marketing perspective, political parties, and in particular, the Democrat party really need to re-evaluate their merchandising to the masses. Just saying…)