Drugs!

Day 5 after the accident. The Insurance company is still waiting for the police report. The woman who ran the light is claiming that it was I, not her that ran the light.

I did the obligatory recorded statement for the insurance company yesterday, recording my account of the accident. My car is supposedly heading to the reapair facility in Riverside for it’s assessment, still don’t know if it’s totaled or not.

I’ve been looking into replacement vehicles and unless my insurance company is really on the ball, I suspect I’m going to be driving a rust bucket from the 1940s. 

Great!

On the plus side, It may mean that nobody will mess with me on the road. On the negative side, I’ll have to deal with inevitable car repairs over and over again.

But being on pain killers isn’t all bad. At least I’m not hurting so bad I can’t see straight. 

Been thinking about just using the bike, but right now I don’t have the strength to get it off the center stand. We’re not even going to talk about the decreased reaction time or balance issues that the drugs are causing.

Yup, I’m going to need a car. Right now I have a rental provided by the insurance company, but that’s a time limited option.

I’ve come to the conclusion that San Diego is not for me, and it’s not been a good year. I’ll chalk that up along with other mistakes I’ve made in my life and now it’s about figuring out how to move on. 

As you might be able to tell, the drugs are interfering a bit with my thought processes. I’m kind of random in my thinking.

It’s funny, after the accident it’s been hard to think. I’m not sure what’s causing that. It could just be stress, the doctor seems to think that I’m going to be alright but it’s weird for me to be unable to just think straight.

I’m at my house under the carful watch of the dog. He knows something is up and is checking on me regularly. Nice to know I’m important in someone’s view. 

I’ve decided I’m going to take tomorrow off. That allows me to not have to sit in Friday traffic to get to Escondido. It also allows me to have another day of rest. 

Unfortunately, it means that I’ll be dinged again for taking a day off, even though I’ve explained what’s going on. But hey, they have a Zero Tolerance policy. So perfection is all that is acceptable.

I had to laugh yesterday because when I finally got ahold of someone in HR one of the first questions they asked was to determine if I’d been in the accident on company business. Yeah, I get it but really? You’re concerned about limiting your liability when an employee is just trying to find out what the procedure is to take a couple of days off after being injured? God! What cold blooded people. 

I think that’s one of the biggest things we’ve lost, in our country. Humanity! Yeah we’ll bitch and wail about someone in another country being mistreated, but we have no compassion or kindness for the people in our own country who deal with really tough issues every day. I know… Let’a blame Trump

I saw that LAPride is going on this weekend, and they’re going to have some kind of rally to protest the inequity they perceive with the new pres. I can’t understand what the hell they’re talking about. Nothing has really changed, this president is like the old president. Nothing new.

I was watching the James Comey testimony yesterday. A lot of it sounded like a rehash of all that had gone before. I did have one take-away though. Comey was documenting ever encounter with President Trump. I think that’s a good idea for me to implement with my boss… I don’t trust him any more than Comey trusted Trump.

Enough of my ramblings… Just figured I’d update what’s going on.

The whole day has been spent…

Cleaning up someone else’s mess.

I’ve been on the phone off & on since 6:30 AM PST

Insurance company, rental car company, towing company, insurance company, trying to reach someone in HR at the POS company I work for.

I kinda need a couple of days off give the way I feel but NOOOO! Not one person in the HR or benefits dept could be bothered to call me back. So much for being able to access your benefits, one of which is supposed to be having time off when your injured. 

While my injuries are not severe, I am in a lot of pain and would like to know how to activate or access those benefits without being penalized for being absent.

Typical of the fucked up chaos that is that company.

Yeah I’m hurting and cranky but I’m expected to be sitting at my desk with a smile on my face at 5AM tomorrow. I suppose this is how they force you to show up. I really have come to hate working there. Bad management, bad supervisors, poor organization, and no assistance whatsoever.

So now I have to decide take another “occurrence” risking being fired, or show up hoping I can keep a lid on my temper.

I’m going the Scarlett O’Hara route… “I shall think about this tomorrow.”

Well $1000 a day, Wish I’d taken a vacation instead.

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So I’m heading to the apartment in Escondido. After a long day, I’m looking forward to having something to eat. I come to an intersection, the light is green and has been for at least 10 -20 seconds. I proceed through the intersection and out of the corner of my eye is movement where it shouldn’t have been.

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Suddenly, there’s a van in front of me. I stand on the brakes but it’s far too late. The laws of physics can’t be denied.

I hit the van broadside The last thing I see is children, OH SHIT! I hit them. All things considered, I wish I’d been able to defer paying for the car repair… I only had my Wolf back for 3 days.

The van spins then turns over finally coming to rest on it’s side. Facing the opposite direction from it’s original direction of travel.  I see steam coming from under my hood, and have the presence of mind to shut the engine down, then count my bones. I’m facing about 90° from my original direction of travel.

SHIT!

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I see adults hanging from their seat belts. The children are also hanging in their car seats. I don’t see blood so that’s good.

I remember something about Moment Of Inertia and realize that the woman driver must have been really traveling. I find my phone, have to think about how to disconnect the phone from the hands free system. I dial 911 and a chirpy operator answers immediately.

“911 what’s your emergency?”

“Uh I’ve been in an accident.”

“Where?”

“Uh corner of Grand and Valley”

“Is anyone hurt?

“Not sure, we’re going to need police, traffic control, tow trucks, and possibly paramedics.”

“Are you alright?”

“I don’t know, I think I’m OK but I’m not sure.”

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Internally, my diagnostics are running overtime. Systems aren’t reporting in the way they should. I realize later it was adrenaline blocking pain receptors.

We are designed to remain functional despite severe injuries. Part of the design is to block pain until the fight is over.

A crowd has gathered. A guy signals a Thumbs Up at me. I shake my head yes. He moves to the other vehicle.

I get out of the car, I don’t remember hanging up the phone.

The police arrive, a too young handsome cop asks me for my license, registration & insurance.

There is chaos, and some nice folks volunteer to me and the police that the van ran the red light.

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I think my wolf died today.

So I get to miss another day of work. I will never be able to replace my wolf with the current job. Hell, I probably can’t replace the car with any car on the pay I earn. This is literally my worst fear of living in San Diego. People here drive like they’re in Tijuana.

The driver of the other car was Spanish speaking only.  According to the police they are insured, so there’s that.

It’s been a couple of hours, now and I’m stiff and sore. Tomorrow will no doubt be a day of pain.

So now I get to clean up another mess, that I didn’t create. And I’ll suffer both financially and possibly lose my job over it.

I’ve been looking for another job anyway, but this will probably end my job on someone else’s terms. Great!

This might be very very bad…

 

That was Painful!

I’ve got my car back. It’s running pretty well and for the price I paid it should be.

On the plus side, the work they did is warranted for 2 years. I guess that’s worth it.

There are still issues that need to be tended to. But for the time being, I’ll treat my Wolf with respect and kindness and hopefully he’ll do the same for me.

Mostly it’s sensors, to be expected since they’re all 9 years old. 

But there is the concern I have over the clutch. It’s showing signs of it’s age, and should be taken care of as soon as it’s financially possible. While I like the neat new features of the new BMWs. I’d kinda like to get another 8 years or so out of my current vehicle.

Unless something fantastic happens like a new job, that actually pays.

I losing ground financially. The longer I’m in this bind the closer I am to going down the drain. I’ve been paying off the cards, and this is a huge setback.

The company paying only twice a month means that Summer is very cash lean right when I really need to have the cash. They’ve not allowing overtime anymore and that too is putting a squeeze on the employees. 

Rent just went up on the apartment so there’s that too.

I know I need to do something to make things better, but I’m not sure exactly what the shape of that change is, could, or should be.

Gotta keep working on it.