Random Ideas, Comments & Thoughts, Sometimes Political, Sometimes Adult… Hope you don't choke.
Happy Birthday!
Thank you USMC for all that you do so that I sleep soundly at night.
Those Marines going to the Ball… Have fun, Be safe, and if you have too much to drink, call a buddy, or cab.
Those of you that know me, I’ll come pick you up.
Be on notice, if you hurl down the side of my car, You’re going to be hand washing and waxing it in your boxers come morning.
Big Hug & All the best
So, you pay a ton of cash for a surround system and you decide that you’d like to enjoy it.
Ya take the dogs out to potty, settle in with your beer and fire up a movie that you’d like to watch.
Then your other half comes in.
They’ve had a long day so you give them time to settle too.
All is quiet again.
Ya press play, (it should be noted that when you’re alone in the house you don’t need the TV sound up to more than 25.) Yet with the other half in the house, you find yourself creaping the volume up, 26, 27, 30, 35, 40, 45 and you’re still missing dialog.
Your other half is reaching into a bag of snacks, over and over and over again and the crinkling of the mylar bag is swamping all the midrange dialog from a beautiful seductive actress, and most of the dialog from the softer spoken men.
Then one dog starts panting, the other dog decides it is time to drink half a bowl of water and does it for the next 3 minutes
slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp, crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp.
Once you push the volume above 60 ya realize you’re fighting a losing battle and the first gunshot or explosion in this movie is going to cause something that looks like the Maxell commercials or Marty McFly hitting that chord on his guitar.
So in complete frustration, ya shut the shit down. Give up.
I actually went and had my hearing checked because of shit like this. Turns out my hearing is fucking fine in fact it’s better than most men my age. The problem is that I live in a noisy environment.
And the moment, the very fucking moment you kill the shit you were trying to relax with, silence reigns again. The dogs shut the hell up, the other half looks at you like you’re a fucking madman and then has the audacity to ask why’d you turn it off?
You’re still frustrated and you say exactly what’s on your mind “Because I couldn’t fucking hear a damn thing with all the noise. Did it ever occur to you to put that shit in a bowl?”
Yeah, I’m sleeping on the couch tonight. So the fuck what?
At least it will be quiet in the living room!
I hate Verizon for ohhh so many things but today I especially hate them for the following.
I’m paying for 3372 / 768 DSL I think that’s the right number combination. I’d look it up to be exactly spot on, BUT Verizon’s web page is behaving like I’m using a dial-up connection.
The speeds I’m getting on my DSL connection are varying from 1024 to 2112 / 500 to 860. (First number is download speed, the next number is upload speed)
As I said I’ve tried to access their web page to figure out if there is a way to report the problem without having to wait on hold for 45 minutes then speak to someone who sounds like an episode of SouthPark. You know the sounds… dirka dirka bla dirk neeig hhhaaa dis is johnny coon I dirka you?
Then be run though a series of dumb assed “TESTS” that prove nothing about the quality of their shitty service but everything about their condescension to their customers.
After all, what part of; “Your service was working this morning, then degraded, then quit, and my router is saying it can’t see a stable DSL connection. The router is indicating the failure by the display of RED indicators on it’s front panel and its control interface which I am looking at via my internal network, is saying that the DSL Carrier signal is dropping at .5 second intervals,” don’t these morons understand?
“Well sir your network cannot work unless you have your computer directly connected to our DSL machine.”
Really? then riddle me this… how am I supposed to print to a network printer?
“Sir, you would connect the printer to the computer.”
Then how would I be able to print a web page? The computer and the printer only have ONE ethernet port.
“I don’t know sir, I can’t advise you.”
BUT YOU JUST DID! You just told me to disconnect my DSL modem from my fully functional internal network and connect my computer directly to the DSL modem in order for your service to work. I’ll tell you what, let me speak to a supervisor.
“Certainly sir, one moment… “
I sigh in frustration, all I want to do is report that they’ve got a problem with DSL in the area.
Thinking about it this is exactly why I left Verizon Cellular. (I think) Aside from them overselling their network to the point that I couldn’t have a conversation along the 91 Freeway that didn’t drop the call every 30 seconds, I called them to report one of their cell towers had part of the antenna array hanging by its wires and blowing in the wind.
I knew it was their tower because Verizon Signs were all over the fence surrounding the base of the antenna mast.
But the idiot that answered the phone wanted to put me through a phone diagnostic instead of listening to what I was reporting; “Hey your have part of your antenna at this location swinging in the wind you might want to get a repair crew out here.”
After realizing I wasn’t getting anywhere I hung up I figured, “Fine, let 150,000 dollars worth of equipment crash to the ground from 80 feet up. Not my problem!” The moron called me back to complete the phone diagnostic.
Click, Click: “dirka dirka blingbla dirk neeig hhhaaa dis is Ronny coon I dirka you?”
ARRRRHHHHHGGGGGGGHH!
After 45 minutes, I suit up…
I’m gonna go collect me some Skulls!
