Month: October 2012

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Riddle me This?

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A recent report from Bloomberg reports that Oil Prices (Meaning Crude Trading) is currently at a Two month low, and that as the US output has risen, the Demand has eased.

So Why are we still seeing gas prices that are 4.99 for a gallon of regular?

Really?

The oil futures and price per barrel jumps if there’s the slightest change in the breeze, or a Congressman farts. Driving the cost of a gallon of gas up…

So why isn’t the converse true? More supply means that the cost of gas shouldn’t be as high, isn’t that economics 101?

This leads me to think, contrary to what the Oil Companies have reported for years… Gas prices are directly tied to the cost of crude and the anticipated supply that there’s really a far more insidious conspiracy of artificial controls actually keeping the gas prices up.

Lets see…

Obviously, Obscene Profits are a huge motivator.

Keeping fuel prices artificially high would play out nicely for Corporate America in an election year, since fuel / transportation prices directly affect every aspect of the economy.

Think about it, If a cabal of American or International businesses were to decide that they didn’t want a particular President in office, one way to get that president out of office would be to strangle an already weak economy.

When the preferred candidate was elected, then fuel prices drop and the economy spins up again. People go back to work, new jobs are suddenly created and voila… The new President has turned things around!

I don’t know if this line of reasoning is anything but a trip down conspiracy lane… but I do think that EVERY American should remember that regardless of what the press tells us, and regardless of what the Oil companies tell us…

There is no direct causal link between the cost of a barrel of crude, and the cost of gasoline at the pump… At least not anymore.

When the Oil Barons are testifying before congress and poor mouthing that they have no control over the prices of fuel, I pray to GOD that at least one congressional committee member has the balls to stand up and call BULLSHIT right to the Oil Executives faces on CSPAN!

What would be even better would be if the Oil Executives were clapped in Irons and dragged out of the hearing chambers for lying to congress.

Hell I’d PAY to see that!

Occupy Wall Street should be Occupy EXXON, British Petroleum, Atlantic Richfield, ConocoPhillips, and all the other bastard Oil companies as well as Wall Street futures traders…

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I call Bullshit on Oil Companies

An article in the Christian Science Monitor talking about the gas prices in California has really convinced me of a couple of things. Read the article here

Gas prices california e1349449021752

First, I’ve come to believe that the oil companies USE California as a test bed to see how the public will respond to ever increasing gas prices. They raise the prices till the bitching gets really loud and the people of California start demanding hearings in congress.

Then the oil companies back the prices down after apologizing and giving some lame ass excuse.

At the same time they’ve modeled how fast the gas prices can go up before people start really bitching. Then they halve that rate of increase and apply it to the rest of the country. But… and this is the interesting thing… The cost of gas never returns to it’s “Pre-Crises” value.

If the crises is over why doesn’t the cost return to the previous level?

Second, California environmental regulations play directly into the hands of the oil companies. Fully .50 of every gallon of gas is nothing but state taxes. Which means that even those people in California trying to pay attention to the actual price of a gallon of gas have to separate out the state, county, and city taxes on the price per gallon and since those rates are all over the map depending on where you fill up in your 4 hour commute per day you may have all or only one or two of those additional fees.

Southern California is particularly vulnerable to this kind of manipulation. Because the mass transit system SUCKS!

Yes… the politicians would have you believe that mass transit in Southern California is wonderful…

But the reality is; If you happen to live in the Inland Empire (Pomona, Glendora, San Dimas, Riverside, Ontario, Corona, San Bernardino, or Fontana) and you work by necessity in Orange County or Los Angeles you’re kinda screwed. If you live in Orange County and work in LA you’re just as screwed.

 Taking a train to Orange County is pretty much pointless because after you’ve gotten there the transit system is unreliable as hell and you’re talking busses or calling a taxi… there’s nothing else. If you’re trying to get from OC to LA that’s an expensive and painful trip via train, provided you don’t get a message like this;

Trip Options

TripMaster found NO trip(s) leaving from ORANGE COUNTY AIRPORT to LOS ANGELES INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT. You are traveling on Saturday and Leaving at 12:12PM . Fare class: Regular. Max walk: 1/3 Mile. Mode: ANY. Try changing walking DISTANCE or travel TIME or MODE or FILTERING. Make sure the locations are correct.

Getting to LA from the Inland Empire via train isn’t that bad then you can grab a metro rail (like the “L” in Chicago but not elevated) the problem is that using the train/metro rail system/bus can literally add hours to your commute and god help you if you have to work late, or you have a swing shift you might get to work but you can’t get home.

Essentially, the people of Southern California are faced with spending 5 or 6 hours commuting via train versus 4 hours commuting via their cars. Which would you choose, given that you do want to spend some time with your loved ones. You’d like to see your children and perhaps have an opportunity to have sex. Then there’s the issue of maybe trying to work out and get some exercise.

I know… I’ve done that madness for years! Give me my car not because I like sitting on the freeway but because I like getting home before 10PM.

The point is the Oil companies have a mostly captive audience.

Los Angeles, Orange County, The Inland Empire are these wonderful petri dishes where Big Oil can float higher gas prices and see just what kind of lame assed excuses the moronic public will accept.

The article I referenced above says that three factors are driving the cost of gas up in California.

1) State refineries have lowered production as they get ready to switch to “winter blend” (This is all about California regulations and pollutions controls. It also causes excessive wear & tear on our engines and a commensurate drop in our MPG. So we’re at the gas stations more often buying more shitty gas.) This is a yearly event and yet… The Oil companies always shut the refineries down at the same time. How about this MORONS? Try scheduling one refinery at a time being shut down then when it’s switched to winter blend, and running again take the next one offline to make the switch and so on. You can do the same damn thing when you switch to Summer Blend so you don’t screw the hell out of the public as they’re trying to get set for their paltry 2 week vacations. (Don’t forget it’s not just Gas. It’s also Airline fuel, and diesel that are suddenly in short supply twice a year.)

2) A power outrage at a Torrance Refinery, and partial shutdown at a Richmond refinery. Really? Just how long was the refinery without power? Months? I think not… And why is the Richmond refinery partially offline?

3) Several refineries in the Central Valley have been shutdown for weeks because of “High Organic Chloride Levels in the Crude”.  SAY WHAT??? So what exactly does that mean? Are they shipping the High Organic Chloride crude to another refinery? Are they throwing it away? What EXACTLY does that mean?

 SO I call BULLSHIT on Big Oil and think that everyone else should too.

Time to BITCH LOUD LONG and HARD

Write your representatives and demand the oil companies stop fucking with us. 

Off to write a letter to politicians

Because I’m not going to pay 4.99 a gallon for gas. Oh and don’t even try to make me say “Oh goodie” about 4.99 a gallon by pointing out that Europe is over $8 per gallon.

Big Deal! So What? 52% of their oil isn’t coming from under their feet.

Don’t even mention a Prius, or accuse me of driving a gas guzzler. I’ll give you an earful that will feel like an ice pick through your brain.

 

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Legalese!!!! Everywhere you look…

I understand that we live in a litigious world. 

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I get that people and companies want to protect and preserve their rights.

But FUCK!!!!

Ever tried to wade through a Microsoft agreement? You have to BE a lawyer to understand what the Lawyers wrote.

Worse yet, are the Apple Agreements that are in your face all the time. If you use iTunes, have an iPod, use an iPad or god help you have an Apple Computer every time you bring up a piece of software it seems, you’re confronted with YET Another licensing agreement from Apple.

Enough already!

These agreements are so ubiquitous to have become irrelevant. I have no idea what I’ve agreed to anymore!

I used to diligently read them start to finish but they became longer, more complex, filled with more legalese and longer still. Now I don’t even try. Invariably I’m confronted with a document that is as long as War & Peace which might as well be written in Aramaic when I’m just trying to do something simple…

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You know, something like sync my iPod before I head out for the day. More than once I’ve said screw it! just leaving the iPod sitting on the desk.

This morning was a classic example. I fired up iTunes to listen to some music, My iPad started syncing. I noticed that there were a bunch of application updates. Oh, I thought, I’ll start those downloads while I’m eating breakfast.

I come back to the computer 30 minutes later to discover that NOT One of the updates have downloaded. Why? Because Apple made some changes  to the terms of use, or the licensing  agreement or they changed the toilet paper in Cupertino or something!

What ever it was that they changed, required that I accept a document as cryptic as the writing on access hatch to the Alien ship that crashed in Roswell. This document is  longer than the recorded history of mankind. I’d be better off, and have several Phd’s to my credit if I read half as much.

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The practical upshot is that I scrolled & scrolled & scrolled & scrolled to the bottom of this overly complex tome, found the little checkbox next to agree, clicked it and then the aptly named “submit” button.

I have no clue what I agreed to. Did I just give Apple my left testicle?

These agreements aren’t fair!

I, like most consumers just want my damn computer to work. I want my software to work.

I honestly don’t give a crap about the companies that are oh so intent on protecting themselves.

If they make good shit I’ll buy it, and use it. If they don’t… or their shit stops being good, or they update it and I don’t’ like the update I’ll find something else. In fact I’ve done exactly that.

We all know that Quicken Products have become something to be replaced as quickly as possible. It’s interesting that Quickbooks (Which BTW I paid $300 for 10 years ago, and then $149 for 7 years thereafter) is discounted on the Intuit site to $199. I know a lot of people that are searching for less expensive alternatives, and they’re finding them.

Those of us that helped the Omni Group build the popularity of their products aren’t updating their products anymore unless we absolutely have to. Mainly because the Omni Group is greedy, charging WAY TOO MUCH for upgrades. 

Several years ago I had enough, I no longer have any Omni Group programs on my computer.  I was a serious fan. At one point I owned the professional editions of all their core applications. Now, I use Powerpoint, or Adobe Illustrator instead.  

The cost of upgrades aside, I absolutely can’t stand being held hostage to an agreement from Apple so that I can update applications I purchased from 3rd parties. The agreement Apple threw in my face this morning was exactly that. Had I not agreed to it, I wouldn’t have been able to update the applications that I’d purchased.

And people talk about Google being “Evil“… 

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Apple really needs to understand, they’re the ones that created the app store / update mechanism.

They probably shouldn’t remind all us Sheeple that we’re hostages. Otherwise we’re likely to see what alternatives are available.

Wha… I see an update server… Baah Baaaaahh.

 

 

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Paraprosdokian Of the Week

A Friend sent me a list of these. I thought it would be fun to share them.

Paraprosdokians are phrases or sentences that lead us down the garden path to an unexpected ending.

You’re never too old to learn something stupid.

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Why people like me hate Indian technical support centers

This morning, I finally got annoyed enough with my DSL modem that I braved using the Technical Support “Chat” line.

It was almost if not quite as annoying as actually speaking on the phone with technical support.

The problem is this; The modem I own, leases an IP address from Verizon every 2 hours. 

For my nontechnical friends that read this blog… This means that every two hours the modem asks for a number that is very much like a house number. That number is then used to access the internet sending and receiving packets of information. Think of it like thousands of little packages that may have bits of Mail, or music, or Video.

I ask for some information and the web site I’ve made the request of, packages up the answer and sends it to this address.

The difficulty is that the address may change. It doesn’t always, but it can unless you pay an extra fee to have what’s called a “Fixed IP” address. 

This means that every 2 hours due to Verizons slow response I lose internet connectivity for about 90 seconds.

You wouldn’t think that was a big deal except that during that 90 second window if you happen to be doing research on the Web, or streaming a video, or downloading something you’re suddenly disconnected from the internet.

So you end up having to restart a download, re-enter the web address that you were on and sometimes you have to close your browser and start all over again. If you’re streaming a movie from Netflix… well You’ll get an error that says Netflix is unavailable and to try your request again later.

FYI the interruption ALWAYS happens at the most suspenseful moment during a movie.

So This morning I decide that I’m going to fix this problem once and for all. I already know that there is no obvious method for changing the lease time from the consumer web application. I’m hoping that there’s a command I can enter to change the settings via another method.

I click on the little “Chat” icon and type the following;

“I want to change the lease interval time on my XYZ Modem, Serial number XXXXX Firmware version X.V.UU.Y from the current defalt of 2 hours to something more reasonable like, say 8 hours. Is this possible? If so, How do I do it?”

What I get back from R. is

“I am sorry for the inconvenience, Am I to understand that you wish to change the lease time from 2 hours to 8 hours?”

I’m reading this and thinking “Uh Oh, this is either going to be a really long conversation or a really short one seeing as I’m really short tempered with people apologizing for no reason.” 

It’s a hollow gesture, why do people feel they need to start a conversation with an apology? I’m asking a fairly straight forward question.

I answer

“Yes”

R says,

“I need to confirm the number of computers you have connected both on WiFi and network, The operating system you’re using and if you have the latest updates installed on your computer”

“Yep” I think its going to be one of those calls.”

I answer

“The number of computers at this location is irrelevant. However there are 16 devices of various types currently connected to the network that the modem is providing internet access to.

There are 4 computers, 2 DVDs 2 Satellite Boxes, 3 Phones, 1iPad, 1 Television, 2 Apple TVs, and one printer.

These devices are running the Android OS, the Apple IOS, Windows, XP, Windows 7, Mac OS 10 versions 8 and 7, Linux, UNIX, and VXWorks.

As you can see the devices, operating systems, and uses for these devices is not germane to the question. Since the question I asked, Can I change the IP address lease time in your modem has absolutely nothing at all to do with any of these devices being present on the network. 

In fact your modem sees only one device. That device is the WiFi router. So will you answer the question I asked or will you continue to work your way down that infernal script your reading from?”

R Says, “Please wait while I check my resources”

Yep, gonna be one of those calls… Several minutes tick by.

R returns

“There is no way for you to change the lease time. How do you know that the lease is 2 hours?” 

OH yeah definitely one of those days…

I tell R.

“Click on Modem Status, At the bottom of the screen click on Connection Status, then when the dialog box opens, you’ll see the time that the previous lease was obtained and the time that the lease is set to expire. The difference between the two numbers is 2 hours.

I’ve worked with other modems that allowed you to select the expiration time of the lease”

R Says, “Please wait while I check my resources” again…

R Comes back, “No sir this modem doesn’t’ provide that capability.”

I say, “OK please put it in your suggestion box. Depending on what you’re doing you can be interrupted as much as 5 times a day waiting for the internet to be available again. A more realistic value to use would be 6, 8, or 12 hours. Or simply have the client be able to set it. Obviously if Verizon were to need to re-assign IPs to the modem their servers could handle that as needed. As it is everyone using this model of DSL modem is needlessly hitting Verizon’s DHCP servers every couple of hours.

R. “Yes, I understand your concern. I will correlate this information…” 

I closed the Window.

Poor Little R. Had returned to his script. I had my answer and therefore had no further need of him.

So now on to the rest of my day. With the sure and certain knowledge that every 2 hours my internet connection will be disrupted.

I can’t blame the Call centers or the chat centers. It’s just when someone asks a question that doesn’t involve “How do I plug this in?”

I really wish that we could dispense with the scripted questions.

Verizon does exactly the same thing if you call them. They want to know what kind of computer you have and if you’ve upgraded to the latest version of the software. Which really doesn’t matter if the customer is calling because they were on the internet and suddenly they weren’t. Obviously the computer was working prior to their call.

But each time you have to answer the stupid questions. (And god help you if you get one of those Ever so helpful Automated Phone system things. I personally loathe the “Genuine People Personalities” they try to imbue those systems with.)

“Was your computer working properly?”

“Is your computer turned on?”

“Can you see anything on your computers display?”

Then finally you get down to the meat of the problem… The Modem is reporting that there is NO DSL connection, which is what you were trying to report in the first place. Of course by this time you’re ready to start ripping your hair out… OR Theirs.

Then it’s the “Oh my, I apologize for the inconvenience I will have to transfer you to the next tier support team please hold.”

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Then you get to start the whole explanation  process over again.

I wish they had a number for those of us “in the biz”. 

Well, actually they do… I have a few numbers I’ve collected over the years written down. 

I wish that you could say some incantation to the voice prompts that would connect you immediately to a 2nd 3rd or 4th tier support person.

99% of the time when a computer geek needs to ask a question… ONLY another computer geek can answer it.

Geek to Geek access time 30 seconds

Geek to mundane readers of scripts access time 48 minutes.

I’m proud to be a bit of a Geek.

Geek Pride!!!!