Month: June 2012

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I am so over Crazy!!

ChaosMan

You know, we all deal with enough crazy shit in our daily lives to make our ancestors convinced that we are all out of our damn minds.

In my neighborhood, there are a number of “eccentric people“.

All but one are pretty quiet and not much of a nuisance. You can most of the time overlook their respective crazy. I think they’re all fairly harmless.

One however, more than makes up for the others and As she’s getting older I’m convinced she’s getting crazier and more dangerous.

Several times offer the past few months she’s been screaming at the top of her lungs at people that weren’t there.

Today… While I’m detailing my car, enjoying the silence that is supposed to be what we enjoy up here in the mountains.

She starts playing music so loud that the whole neighborhood can hear. When I say hear… I mean rattle your teeth loud.

The volume level in my fucking garage 500 feet away was uncomfortably loud.

Then she decided to go on a little promenade carrying on a conversation with at least 4 people (none of whom are actually there). She’s also letting her dogs run free which makes my dogs INSANE. 

My dogs don’t like her dogs, and she finds some humor in my dogs charging the fence to get at her ill behaved animals.

I know I’m supposed to be kind and forgiving but I ask you where the fuck does it stop?

We call the cops, they come up she’s quiet for 20 minutes then it starts all over again. The cops can’t really do anything because SHE’S NUTS and if they don’t perceive her to be a threat to herself, then at most they’ll give her a disturbing the peace citation.

I swear, more and more lately it feels like my right to freedom, happiness, peace in my own home are being steamrolled over by other people and no matter what you do to stand up against it, you get nowhere. 

So I’ve taken the only action I can. I’ve closed the house up, turned on the A/C and decided to do stuff that needs to be done inside. 

Granted I’m comfortable… But it simply means that I’ve imprisoned myself in my own home. 

This kind of SHIT is exactly why I hate living in apartments, condos, and town homes. You always end up being imprisoned just so you can have some peace & quiet. 

I bought a house 80miles out of Los Angeles to escape the bullshit. That apparently was an Epic #FAIL

…And now she’s doing Xena… I expect her to be butt naked in the next 15 minutes. (Not a pretty sight at all!)

Mind you, I’m sitting in my house doors & windows closed and locked washing machine running and I still hear her.

FUCK!

I am sick of other peoples crazy intruding on my life.

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This sounds terrible…

Deer Cave Mulu National Park Borneo Malaysia 1440x1080

I have the entire house to myself, and the weekend to myself too!

For two whole days I can turn the house into my man cave… 

I don’t have to be embarrassed that I’m watching a really bad “b” or “c” grade scifi movie. I can stay in my boxers if that’s what I want to do. And I can eat what I want… when I want and nobody can say shit about it.

I’m on antibiotics again so I really shouldn’t be drinking… but I think I can sneak a Jack Daniels without the world coming to an end.

I do have to do some things, but those chores are actually chores that I like doing. The plan is to wash and wax my car and do a little detailing without endless interruptions. Then start pre-packing for a trip so I know everything I need and want is in the luggage and ready to go.

I don’t have to fix anyones technology but my own. If I don’t feel like fixin stuff, the shit can stay broken and there’s no-one to whine at me about when it’s going to be fixed.

I can walk around nude, stoke my dick and most blissfully of all… I can sleep the sleep of the dead without earplugs. I won’t be awaked 3 times a night.

And in further news… I knew as I typed it that I wouldn’t be home alone… The Godson showed up!

OK so no naked debauchery and I won’t be watching porn on the big screen. 

I can’t complain… he’s good company and tends to spend his time with his friends on the rare days off he has. He’s going to be looking after the house while I’m on a couple of trips. 

I do find myself wondering why his schedule is so erratic. It’s like he has no defined workweek and That has to be really tough given that he is a very social animal. He comes in and has to often do at least one week if not two of laundry and fit in his banking or other personal business affairs into a very few business hours.

For example he got off work yesterday at 5:00, the week is shot since it’s Friday and him raising anyone to do business is pretty unlikely, he goes back to work Sunday morning.

Just when the fuck is he supposed to deal with banking, his bills, or any of the other stuff that modern life entails.

I personally think the management where he’s working hasn’t ever managed a crew of people. They’re completely oblivious to the realities of their employee needs.

But it’s not my business. I can say I’d do it differently, but then again… I’ve managed crews of 20+ folks and have a bit of a clue about how to schedule folks.

On the plus side, he’s making pretty decent bank for someone his age. 

So my plans change a little bit… but I love the kid and wouldn’t have it any other way.

Humm man cave time on Sunday? 

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Paraprosdokian Of the Week

A Friend sent me a list of these. I thought it would be fun to share them

Paraprosdokians are phrases or sentences that lead us down the garden path to an unexpected ending.

We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.

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Nice to know that I’m not the only one…

Norcalreflection

Was at the Car Dealership yesterday and overheard a couple of conversations that had me nodding in agreement.

California isn’t just hated by me… 

I heard two separate conversations between four different men all of whom are in their mid 40s to mid 50s. In their conversation they were all talking about packing up their shit a leaving the state.

One guy was waiting for his 2 sons to get out of the house. One of them is going to be a sheriff, the other one is 23 and still at home, fighting for a job in an ever decreasing job market.

In this guys case he wasn’t too upset at having a 23 year old living with him. He rightly observed that with things as expensive as they are here, his sons really couldn’t afford to be out on their own. His strategy is to leave for Arizona when his boys have settled.

One of the other guys had just packed up his company and was having his car serviced as the last step before moving to Reno. The money his company was going to save in taxes and fees over the next year PAID for him to be able to pay for the relocation of his entire staff.

In yet another conversation, a guy was counting the days to retirement (90) then he & his wife were heading to New Mexico. They’d already sold their house and had packed up most everything which was sitting in a storage facility in NM. They were doing the minimalist thing until he retired.

His wife had been nice enough to her employer to let them know that she’d be leaving in 90 days… Of course the fuckers she worked for fired her because after all she wouldn’t be working as hard knowing that she’d be leaving… (To This I say WTF??? She could have trained her replacement and she wasn’t under any obligation to let her employer know shit! But courtesy is truly a thing from another age.)

The last guy was funny as hell because he too was heading to Arizona. He said it was as simple as the gas prices dropped 60 to 70 cents per gallon when he crossed the border out of California… He said that alone was enough to sell him on relocating. But then his wife got laid off and after searching for a job in her field for 9 months she’s decided to leave the kids & grandkids in CA and accepted a job in her field in Flagstaff. 

If the kids want to visit it’s not too crazy a drive for them, and It’s an easy drive for the guy and his wife too. When asked why drive? He replied; “Who wants to fly anymore? I know I don’t want the TSA feeling me or my wife up she might trade men in…”

The common thread is that all of these guys are middle aged, Middle to late career and they’ve had enough of the B.S. that is California.

Of course what this means is that if the trend continues… California will have a tourist industry ONLY and the dream that was once the Golden State will be just another tourist trap. 

Even the technology companies are leaving. Many of them are reducing their presence here to nothing more than small offices. They’re not even maintaining corporate headquarters here. It’s just too damn expensive…

All of this is to say, 

It’s nice to know I’m not insane or over-reacting as some people close to me have implied. 

I think I can move to another state following work in my field. After 15 years of patiently driving obscene distances I can finally and with a clear conscience put the Golden State in my Rear View Mirror

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More Car Service

Car220100428

At the car dealership… Again!

One of the problems with modern cars… although I think the problem is more about the people servicing modern cars is that the computer in the car dictates what service can be done and when.

For example, I know I’m taking a trip that will have me driving at least 3000 miles. 

As in the old days… I still like to have the car serviced, tires checked, oil changed, you know BEING RESPONSIBLE so that I don’t have a dead ass piece of junk off to the side of the road in the middle of an unfamiliar town and not knowing who to call or perhaps being uncertain of exactly where I am so that I can get help.

Well the computers have other ideas… Apparently, you’re not supposed to drive your car more than 300 miles from home. 

See last time I was here I explicitly told the dealership I was going on a long trip. So I wanted all services done before I left.

I didn’t have to worry about my trip being interrupted by the car bitching about service needed. Unfortunately, the computer and the people doing the service had other ideas. The computer said that 4300 miles remained before the next service. Between the time that I had the car in for service and today… I’ve driven 600 miles. The car is now saying it wants service in 2200 miles. Hummm…. Can you see the problem?

See, I know the car… I know the kind of driving I do, I know that going up & down the mountain puts a monkey wrench in the mileage calculation. But try to explain that to a machine… or the people that act like machines.

I’ll grant you there are benefits to the computerization of our vehicles. You don’t have as many situations where your spouse says “I didn’t know I needed an oil change, or I didn’t hear the squealing of the brake calipers on the rotors”

But as I say all too often… I’M THE HUMAN, you’re the machine… do what I said.

So here I sit… waiting for another 3 hours for my car to be serviced. Those 3 hours… By the way would be mine… If folks had done what I asked in the first place.

Isn’t that a kick in the pants… It always seems to come down to:

Do what I’m telling you