I suppose I have a bit of a different view.

All the hubbub over David Petraeus having an affair is really confusing me.

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Since this, like the election is inescapable I’ll comment.

I’ve seen articles written by women condemning Petraeus, and men in general. One that caught my attention was titled something like “Why powerful men cheat”

I could counter that article with “Why are so many women attracted to men in power?”

It cuts both ways.

I personally believe that ALL Men cheat at some point or another in their lives, (God knows I have!) In the case of powerful men they’re under a lot more scrutiny and therefore are more likely to be caught.

In this age of Democrats being saints and Republicans being sinners. Anyone who is conservative or Republican is far more likely to have their skeletons yanked out of the closet. It doesn’t matter if  the indiscretion happened 25 years ago or last week.

The Petraeus scandal should serve as a cautionary tale to everyone, most especially anyone with a conservative stance.

A lot of you may not like what I’m going to say next.

First, let me say I’ve never subscribed to the concept that men are supposed to be in monogamous relationships.

I’ve tried it. Didn’t work!

I’ve known a lot of men who tried it and failed as well. 

I don’t think we as men are wired that way. Our nature is to hunt. We thrill at the chase. The pure joy of catching a man or women that we desire is addictive. 

It’s just how we’re built. 

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Why the hell we’re punished for being true to our nature amazes and confuses me. I know intellectually it’s all about the Puritanical beginnings of America. One of these days we’re going to have to get over it.

I need to point out… In my current relationship, I never committed to being monogamous. 

I’ve always been honest about my inability to be monogamous and should I ever be indiscreet enough that I’m “Caught” it will come as no surprise to my partner. Our rule is that we’re not going to throw our playtime with other people in each others face. 

My partner is just as welcome to play with other people. What’s good for the goose is good for the gander. I’ve noted that whenever we play outside our relationship, the experiences gained from that play enrich sex within the relationship. As always YOUR milage may vary.

But above all be honest, be authentic, and be true to yourself. You’d be surprised how good that makes you feel.

If Petraeus is guilty of anything it’s that he was dishonest. But then we don’t know the inner workings of his relationship with his wife. Nor should we.

Why do men Cheat???

For the hell of it!

Look at Petraeus for example. He’s not a bad looking man. He’s 60, he’s had a hell of a career and he knows that career is winding down.

He’s been married to the same woman for 37 years. His wife, isn’t a bad looking woman, she’s… sturdy.

Nonetheless Petraeus, has to be wondering if he’s still got it.

Men are not immune to age. We notice the grey hair at our temples, one day we we get out of the shower and notice our belly isn’t flat anymore, and our pecs aren’t’ the thick slabs of muscle they once were. No matter how hard we fight we know it’s a losing battle. We see the grey hairs in our chest and belly fur. Then the ultimate insult… grey hair on our balls. It can be really depressing, scary, and men as a rule don’t talk about it. We really have remarkably few support structures in this regard. Hell, even Brothers don’t speak to each other about stuff like this.

Then along comes this hot young woman in her 40s. She’s married and she apparently wants to have a bit of fun.

Since she’s a married mother of 2, it’s a pretty safe bet that they can enjoy each others company and it’s not going to go public. After all,  they both have something to lose.

Petraeus, gets to have an adventure with a hot young thing and it feels good for him he’s still got the preverbal “IT”. Broadwell gets to enjoy the thrill of fucking one of the most powerful men in the country. From her perspective he’s dangerous, powerful, and arguably a killer. Lots of women have serious weaknesses for “Bad Boys” Petraeus is the Ultimate “safe” Bad Boy for her to play with.

I can see it, it makes sense to me. These are two adults who happened to be at the right place at the right time in their lives and they went for it.

SO WHAT?

Whether we admit it or not… Every man gets bored with sex with the same person.

We’ve all been there, sex becomes a well known well trodden set of conditioned responses.

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Lick left nipple, caress right nipple, touch there, kiss here, insert there, Thrust 3 times, pause, thrust 5 times, pause, thrust 4 times, talk dirty, oh baby, oh baby, and then it’s nap time. 

Give a man the opportunity to give chase again, give him a new body to play with, unknown territory, suddenly sex is exciting, and he’s 20 again. 

That’s the reason we cheat. It’s not about love, it’s about nothing else but fighting mind numbing boredom.

It’s about feeling young, powerful and desired again. It’s about someone different on their knees in front of you, telling you they want your dick inside them. It’s about hearing someone new groaning in pleasure because you’re sliding it home and they’re loving it.

It might even be about something as primitive as spreading our genetics further. It’s got to be a major thrill at 60 to find out you’ve knocked up your 30 year old mistress… Talk about still having “IT”!

Honestly, I can’t imagine that it’s any different for a woman. 

Let’s see, same man she’s been with for 30 years, she knows exactly how to get him off in 30 seconds or less and she’s gotten to the point that sex isn’t worth it for her because she spends more time cleaning up from the sex than actually having it

OR

The 20 something, tanned, muscular, pool man who’s packing something in his cargo shorts besides a wad of keys.

I have to think the pool man gets a lot of action!

It’s time for us to get over it.

Everyone universally wants to get off. I can’t think of any man that doesn’t like to see ropey jets of their cum shooting across the room. Or better yet, ramming our cock home dumping our cum into a willing orifice.

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We all want that experience to be memorable and exciting. After the hunt, in a hotel room when we get what we worked for. We savor it, the conquest, victory, & validation. When we go home to our spouses we’re still fired up and often a good time is had by all. Months later, we’ll rub one out to the memory, because it still has the power to excite us.

If you accept these truths, then all the hubbub over the latest Sex Scandal is really just a bunch of annoying noise. I’m reminded of the sound of my classmates in elementary school when someone got in trouble. It’s time for us to grow up.

Just because someone has an affair, it doesn’t automatically mean they’re unfit for office. The bigger issue is was there a security breach?

Broadwell, sending threatening emails simply means that she forgot she & Petraeus were  supposed to be casual sex partners, nothing more.

If we were more open to casual sex, I personally think there’d be a lot fewer divorces.

I’m astounded at the venom

I’ve been skimming Twitter.

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I am astounded by the nastiness and venomous gloating coming from the gay community. Over the election results.

I thought these people were the “Educated, Liberal segment of our society”. I thought they were the folks who purported themselves to be better than the zealous, mean, rich, conservative religious right.

I expected them to take the high road and “Win” with grace and good sportsmanship.

Apparently, I was completely WRONG!

Yet another reason that so many Bi & Non mainstream Gay men refuse to associate with the Gay community.

It’s not that these men are ashamed of their sexuality… it’s that they’re embarrassed  by the mainstream “GAY” people who so clearly don’t represent them. 

Butt Toys

Yeah You read it, Yeah I said it.

[I’ve decided to write mini-reviews of items that catch my attention. Personally, I hate jumping in blind and spending $50 to $200 on a toy only to find out that it’s cheaply made, or simply don’t live up to expectations. So take my review in the spirit in which it’s meant. These are my experiences your mileage will probably vary.]

The male butt can be an amazing source of pleasure. I discovered this as an adolescent, but shame and social taboos kept me from really enjoying all that my butt could offer until well into middle age.

Many men, straight and otherwise have been introduced to the pleasures of anal stimulation by their significant others. I’ve known many women that loved “turning the tables” on their men.

Done right, someone stimulating your prostate can add a whole new dimension to sex and orgasm. You want a mind blowing orgasm? Have someone or something massaging your prostate when you cum. I guarantee that you’ll come back for more.

Whether you have a partner or not,  I can suggest a couple of fine toys.

My current favorites are the Aneros Progasm Ice and the Lelo “Billy”

The Progasm Ice is a great toy.

Having used the Aneros MGX for a while, I wanted something a little more interesting. I can heartily recommend the Ice.

One of the things I didn’t care for with the MGX was the perineum tab tended to be a little too sharp. Not like it cut or anything but it just dug into the perineum a little too aggressively for my tastes.

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The Progasm Ice is a different animal altogether

As you can see in the photo the front tab has a nice round ball and provides pressure and stimulation without digging in.

The Aneros toys are deceptive.

They look like nothing at all… yet, used properly these devices can take you to a hands free orgasm.

They’re powered by your own body. As your anal muscles contract, the Aneros presses on your prostate when causes another contraction and so on until you’re blissed out and cumming.

There are conflicting reports about health benefits of having your prostate massaged. Some people swear that prostate massage is essential for good prostate and sexual health. The medical profession seems less convinced.

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I can tell you from my own experience, that prostate stimulation and massage just feels damn good.

Since I’m all about feeling good, as long as my prostate isn’t damaged by whatever is being done to it, I’m a happy man.

My other favorite toy for prostate massage is the  Lelo “Billy”

The “Billy” is pretty darn close to perfect if you’re into powered pleasure.

(I’d never seen a Lelo vibrator until I was shopping with someone very close to me who purchased one for his wife. I was impressed with the design and wondered if they made something for men… Short answer is Yes. )

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The curve is perfect and angles right at the prostate.

The diameter of the “Billy” is just right for beginners to butt play as well as the more… uh experienced user.

The controls are easy to use and the 5 programmed pulse modes combined with the variable speed of the unit make for a wide variety of pleasurable adventures.

This unit is well built, rechargeable, and a whole lot of fun. The “Billy” is a little pricy but looks like it’s going to hold up well.

I personally like the pulse mode. I have no doubt that everyone can find something to make their butt happy.

I’m thinking about giving one of these as a gift to my brother… Well Actually I think I’d have to give it to his wife… I’ll probably have to include 20 or 30 feet of rope so she could tie him down and force pleasure on him!

Combine either or both of these toys with a big healthy dose of Spunk Lube and you’re good to go for playtime either alone, or with your mate.

Spunk Lube has become my go to lube for general play. Whatever you’re sliding into your partner Spunk gives you a silky smooth ride. I’ve had no trouble with condoms or toys and as advertised Spunk cleans up easily.


The problem I suspect most folks have with toys, is the expense.

It’s not like you can walk into a store and try a toy to decide if you like it.

So you look at the item carefully and then you make the call. If you’re lucky the item in question works the way you hope.

I got lucky with these toys,

I hope my review helps you get lucky too.