Ahhh the strange culture we live in…

ChrisPratt

I saw this headline 

Chris Pratt: ‘I am just dumb’

I thought oh for goodness sake NOW WHAT?

As I waited for the web page to load I was wondering who Mr. Pratt had offended. Women? GLBT? Victims of Hetrochromia? White people? Black people? Asian People? Latino people? Sufferers of debilitating Jock or Vaginal itch? Dinosaurs?

hetrochromia

The list playing out in my head spiraled on and on because everyone these days is a victim.

Then the page opened, and I busted up laughing.

Pratt, who is staring in the new Jurassic World movie was “Pre-Apologizing” for what ever offense, slip of the tongue, offhand comment, or expression that might offend someone during the upcoming press junket promoting the movie.

I liked the guy in Guardians of the Galaxy. I never watched Parks & Recreation so I can’t comment.

This “getting in front of the problem,” and you know there will be a problem, is just funny as hell. 

It’s also is nice to know I’m not alone in thinking that we’re all way to damn sensitive.

Chris Pratt with Raptor babies

Chris Pratt found a clever, funny way to poke at “the elephant in the room.”

Heck I might actually go see Jurassic World in the theater…

Movie theater, Humm, Texting, people with too much cologne, talking, answering the phone and then having a conversation, bratty children, screaming babies, the sound track too loud, crowds…

On second thought, I’ll wait for the DVD.

This is why many conservative gay folks…

sandyrios

… are still in the conservative closet. Yeah they’re out about their sexuality, but not about their philosophy, or politics.

All I can say after reading and listening to what this woman said is, “ARE YOU F&$KING KIDDING ME?”

Sandy Rios of Sandy Rios In The Morning said ON AIR that she’s wondering if the sexuality of the Amtrak Engineer in Tuesday’s train derailment was a factor in the accident.

PennsylvaniaTrainCrash

She goes to great lengths and is obviously choosing her words carefully to say she’s not inferring the accident happened because Bostian is gay…

Then goes on to infer exactly that! (Yeah and some of your best friends are gay too!)

Here’s a link to the article in the Huffington Post

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This is the same as me saying, “I’m not inferring that because her last name is hispanic that she’s likely to leave the scene of an auto accident but well sometimes being hispanic is a factor in hit & run accidents… I was once in an accident where a hispanic lady left the scene. I mean she just abandoned her car and a friend picked her up before the cops came.“

True story, The lady did abandon her car on the freeway, left behind one hell of a mess for the CHP to clean up. 

For years gays have been accused of having larger amounts of disposable income than their straight counterparts. Additionally, they’re supposed to be more into taking care of themselves, they’re supposed to drive nicer cars, have nicer homes and apartments, they’re typically well educated, well insured, and well just awesome in every way.

Were you describing a straight person with all those same traits, you’d say they’re responsible & reliable.

gayborhood

Yet when you preface those same traits with “They’re gay…” somehow these traits lose their blush and now all that responsibility & training counts for nothing with conservative assholes like Rios.

I’m a mostly conservative asshole, and I know a lot of really conservative gay men. We’re not obvious about our conservative beliefs for two reasons.

1) Lots of gays are totally Democratic, progressive liberal dip shits.

2) People like this ‘gash in a sundress’, (Thank you Pam from TrueBlood, that is a great line!)

Pam

When you say you’re a conservative gay person you’re treated badly, and people identify you with Perry, Santorum, Rush Limbaugh, or crazed bible thumpers from Westboro Baptist Church.  Obviously, none of my conservative gay friends are anything like these examples, and by the way we don’t hate ourselves either.

Generally we’re thinkers who tend to prefer common sense practicality over “theory”. We don’t tend to buy into social engineering and are more about people deciding what’s best for themselves. We realize we don’t have to agree on every point with someone else and can hold discussions with folks who have different opinions without resorting to name calling. After we’ve had even “spirited” discussions, we can still be friends, have a beer and even sex, and feel great about life and how lucky we are.

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Thank goodness this lady isn’t mainstream.

Next, people like Rios would be claiming that gays shouldn’t operate heavy machinery, drive cars, or fly planes, for fear of a gay person “getting the Vapors” and losing control.

[After all it only takes one despondent faggot, and planes get crashed into the ground.

Oh wait the German pilot was straight… oh wait the Islamic terrorists that crashed into Pennsylvania were straight, and it was a gay man that was one of the leaders of the rebellion against the terrorists on flight 93.]

Flight93memorial

The same line of reasoning was, ironically enough, used to deny women the vote and briefly the ability to drive in this country.

That line of “Less than” reasoning is STILL used in some countries in the Middle East to deny women’s rights.

So Ms. Rios, YA might want to think for just a moment about all the privileges and rights you have, which would have been denied simply because you’re a woman and therefore “Less Capable”.

Then for just a moment think about the fact that you’re suggesting a “Less Than Capable” status because someone is gay. Then after that…

selfiedriving

Do us ALL a favor and shut your pie hole!

Allow me to spell this out using small words so you can understand the meaning.

Gay people are just like everyone else.

Give gay people ALL the rights of being a US citizen and you’ll see just how normal, and dare I say it, “Average” they are.

Oh and by the way, we’re better drivers than you straights…

We do have nicer cars and therefore have to be better drivers, just to avoid accidents with distracted soccer moms like you!

KILL ALL HUMANS!

BenderKillallhumans

After careful consideration and study.

The inevitable conclusion is, to solve climate change we must kill all humans!

After all, the California Delta Smelt, The Wyoming Sage Grouse, The Spotted Owl, and innumerable other species deserve to live in peace with their habitats intact.

As I’m sure you’ll all agree, the only viable solution is we must all die.

To that end, extermination booths will be set up in your neighborhood. When you see the booths, be the first of your friends to step in and die with dignity. It’s quick, painless, and fun!

StarTrekATasteofArmageddon

Persons not stepping into the booths voluntarily, will be hunted down and shot.

Do Mother Earth a favor, kill yourself!


That’s what goes through my mind every single time I read about another EPA or BLM report describing the plight of some creature, in an attempt to guilt us into … WHAT?

Accepting Climate change is real? Irrelevant

Paying some stupid ass carbon tax? Pointless!

Turning over yet more control of our daily lives to a bunch of bureaucrats? There it is! That’s the reason for the guilt ridden landfills full of newsprint.

bueaucrats

I get pissed off.

Species come and go all the time on this planet. They have done since before we came down from the trees, and they’ll no doubt continue to do so long after our bones and our civilization is dust.

Stop guilting us!

If we all resolve to live taking actions daily that minimize our impact on the planet, things will get better.

Stop pumping out children that you simply throw away!

forest

That goes for you Catholics, and you folks in India too.

Stop rushing out to buy the newest latest and greatest of whatever widget is out this month to replace the widget from last month. Come on folks, how much packaging do we really need to fill our landfills?

If you’re so damn worried about carbon emissions… Allow next generation reactors to be built. Take a look at a documentary called Pandora’s Promise. I’m not saying base all public policy on one documentary, but stop dismissing a viable energy source out of hysteria not facts.

Here’s an idea, plant landscaping that is appropriate for your environment. Cacti are adapted to grow in the Southwest for a reason, your weeping willow and Kentucky bluegrass is not!

earthafterhumans

My point here is that we should all be less wasteful, not because it’s mandated, or because we’re terrified, or guilty, but because it simply makes good sense.

If you’re less wasteful, and adapt your habits to the natural world instead of trying to make the natural world adapt to you, things are likely to work a lot more smoothly. 

An additional perk is that climate change becomes part a natural cycle and it no longer has to be terrifying. It no longer matters if its man made or not, because we’re all by choice, making decisions that minimize our impact.

The alternative is…

For the good of the planet…

KILL YOURSELVES!


Update 6/10/2015

And once again I’m ahead of the curve.

I can’t believe that there’s actually a “Voluntary Human Extinction Movement”.


http://www.breitbart.com/london/2015/06/10/wipe-out-humans-to-save-the-earth-group-says/

WIPE OUT HUMANS TO SAVE THE EARTH, GROUP SAYS

Crowd

 

Human beings urgently need to wipe themselves out to avoid ecological catastrophe, the leader of the Voluntary Human Extinction Movement has claimed.

In an interview with the Big Issue magazine, Les U Knight (pseudonym assumed) said that the extinction of humanity would be a good thing for the planet and that humans need to reduce their numbers before they run out of resources.

Mr Knight, who in his day job is a substitute teacher in Portland, Oregon, said that his main motivation for wanting to see the extinction of his own species was “preservation of Earth’s biosphere”.

“Diversity is the strength of the biosphere and the fewer species there are, the weaker it becomes. We’re pulling strands from the web of life and at the same time putting more pressure on it due to our increased consumption.”

He added that increased human population was making it harder to feed the poor around the world.

“People are not doing too well. Two billion people don’t have potable water, almost a billion are experiencing food insecurity – we used to call it hunger – it’s not a pretty world for half the people on the planet and it won’t be easy to improve their lot as long as the progress is gobbled up by our increased numbers.”

One solution, Knight said, could be for the West to introduce a “one child policy” banning couples from having two or more children, as China does, although even this may not be enough.

“One is twice as good as two as far as procreation goes but our population momentum would take a while to start decreasing. In terms of energy consumption, when a North American couple stops at two, it’s about the same as an average Indian couple stopping at 30 or a Bangladeshi couple stopping at 97. At least China has done a lot to control their increase. There would be 400 million more of them today if they hadn’t instituted their policy.”

Knight followed his own logic at the age of 25 when he underwent a vasectomy. He claims he “never regretted it for a moment” and “I only wish I’d done it earlier.”

“It’s dangerous having those wigglers,” he added.

If humanity does not voluntarily wipe itself out, Knight warned, it will face “involuntary extinction”, either through ecological catastrophe or nuclear Armageddon:

“The end of humanity would be good for humanity. That seems contradictory but as we phase ourselves out, the lives of those left behind would steadily improve. And those of us who don’t exist won’t know the difference.”

Not everyone is convinced, however. Dr Kristian Niemietz of the Institute of Economic Affairs told Breitbart London: “Apparently, Les U Knight believes that his statement is incredibly profound and thought-provoking, but it is really just a slightly more extreme version of the lame old eco-miserabilism which has been the conventional wisdom among Western ‘intellectuals’ for more than a generation. Fretting about overpopulation and overconsumption will guarantee you approving nods at every dinner party, but fashionable though those run-of-the-mill greenish views may be, they are theoretically and empirically wrong.

“Over the past three decades, we have seen a spectacular decline in global poverty. If you use the World Bank’s definition of extreme poverty – having less than the equivalent of $1.25 per person per day – then as recently as in the early 1980s, over half of the world’s population were extremely poor. Today, that share has dropped to just below one fifth.

“Poverty is not ‘caused’ by overpopulation. Poverty is the natural state of mankind. Up until about two hundred years ago, virtually everybody in the world would have been poor by the World Bank’s standard. It was only then that we began to grow out of poverty; initially only in what we now call the industrialised West, and over time, more and more countries joined in.

“Malthusians like Knight have an unrealistic view of economic activity. They see human beings as akin to locusts, but human beings are not just passive consumers of whatever they happen to stumble across. We are active problem-solvers, we are innovators, and we are producers.

“For example, the reason why the world can sustain a much larger population than ever before today is that agricultural productivity has improved so massively. It could improve much further still if we dropped our childish paranoia about innovative farming techniques like GMO, and if we moved towards untrammelled worldwide free trade in agriculture.

“Population growth is irrelevant. What matters is institutions and economic incentives. Countries move out of poverty to the extent to which they adopt the basics of a functioning modern economy: the rule of law, impartial courts, and secure property rights. They also need to allow the free formation of market prices, so that prices can act as signals of scarcity, providing incentives to overcome that very scarcity. With rising prosperity, we also grow more resilient to natural disasters, and we can afford to adopt production techniques that go easier on the environment.

“If we continue on anything like the current trend, we may well come close to the eradication of poverty within our lifetime, although doomsayers like Knight will no doubt find some other ‘impending catastrophe’ to moan about.”

Follow Nick Hallett on Twitter:  or e-mail to: nhallett@breitbart.com

You can always tell when…

NewImage

I’ve been interrupted once too many times while trying to write a blog.

Usually I start out having a simple point, then I get interrupted four, five, ten times, and I meander all over hell and gone.

Its been happening a lot lately. The meandering, the interruptions, the loss of my thoughts.

Usually, I’ll trash the whole blog entry. 

There are two reasons for this;

1) I have no clue what the hell I was intending to say,

2) Whatever the hell I did in fact write sounds like a literal translation of Mein Kampf, an Obama speech, or Dianetics 

NewImage

All of which read like gibberish and should probably never see the light of day.

Which explains why you’ve been spared, and “You’re Welcome!”

I have a problem with censoring myself. Sometimes I go too far and sometimes I write past the end of the story or point.

Problem is, there’s a lot of stuff rattling around in my head lately and I’m having a problem keeping up with writing it down. 

I need a computer that understands me and that I can just talk at.

I talk to my current computer all the time. It, like my other half ignores me. 

NewImage

I suppose that’s why I write books and blogs. I think I have something to say and apparently my readers think so too, so the hell with my computer and other half!

I’ll keep writing. You guys keep reading and our relationship will be just peachy.

I’ll try to get back to writing a blog every day or every other day. 

After all, there’s a lot of weird stuff in my curdled brain.

I watched The Birdcage last night

NewImage

It’d been a while and as always, I laughed through it. 

The Birdcage was released in 1996. Yep almost 20 years ago.

What caught my attention was the reference to Al Sharpton.

I can’t find the exact quote but it’s something like;

“The Reverend Al Sharpton said today that Senator Jackson’s last words ‘Your money’s on the nightstand chocolate,’ was racist…”

I just about choked!

Twenty Years ago Al Sharpton was already worthy of parody and today nothing has changed, he’s still race baiting. I guess the good really do die young and the evil fuckers continue to be a plague on us all.

And lest we forget, the overarching backdrop of the movie is politics.

If you haven’t seen The Birdcage in a while, grab a copy, make some popcorn, and have a nice movie night. 

Every single person in that cast was simply awesome.

Even though Robin is gone, his gift for making us laugh remains.

Peace

What’s a guy to do?

Home Theater

So, you pay a ton of cash for a surround system and you decide that you’d like to enjoy it.


Ya take the dogs out to potty, settle in with your beer and fire up a movie that you’d like to watch.

Then your other half comes in.

They’ve had a long day so you give them time to settle too.

All is quiet again.

Ya press play, (it should be noted that when you’re alone in the house you don’t need the TV sound up to more than 25.) Yet with the other half in the house, you find yourself creaping the volume up, 26, 27, 30, 35, 40, 45 and you’re still missing dialog.

Your other half is reaching into a bag of snacks, over and over and over again and the crinkling of the mylar bag is swamping all the midrange dialog from a beautiful seductive actress, and most of the dialog from the softer spoken men.

Then one dog starts panting, the other dog decides it is time to drink half a bowl of water and does it for the next 3 minutes

MartyMcFly Speakers

slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp, crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, pant, crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,crinkle,crinkle, crinkle, crinkle,crinkle,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp,slurp, slurp.

Maxell Man

Once you push the volume above 60 ya realize you’re fighting a losing battle and the first gunshot or explosion in this movie is going to cause something that looks like the Maxell commercials or Marty McFly hitting that chord on his guitar.

So in complete frustration, ya shut the shit down. Give up.

I actually went and had my hearing checked because of shit like this. Turns out my hearing is fucking fine in fact it’s better than most men my age. The problem is that I live in a noisy environment.

And the moment, the very fucking moment you kill the shit you were trying to relax with, silence reigns again. The dogs shut the hell up, the other half looks at you like you’re a fucking madman and then has the audacity to ask why’d you turn it off?

Zen

You’re still frustrated and you say exactly what’s on your mind “Because I couldn’t fucking hear a damn thing with all the noise. Did it ever occur to you to put that shit in a bowl?

Yeah, I’m sleeping on the couch tonight. So the fuck what?

At least it will be quiet in the living room!