A while ago I wrote a piece here titled “hi”
In that piece I explained how annoying it was when I’m on social media sites and I receive the “hi” message from strangers.
I’m probably going to just start replying to those messages with a link to that blog post.
It’s one thing if you know me and start a conversation like that. We already have something in common, it’s quite another thing if we don’t know each other.
Look at the scenario.
Person A Sends a message to person B
Person B gets an email or text notification that they have a message.
They stop what they’re doing, log on to the site where the message originated, navigate to the email and they read the mind bogglingly intelectual message from Person A.
Now Person B checks out the online profile of Person A.
Person B thinks “Hey they’re kind of cute” and despite the fact that the social media site has ample space for Person A to describe themselves and their interests they have refused to provide any information at all except the requisite gender and location.
What is Person B supposed to do? What response can be formulated? As I see it there are four options.
- Respond with “Hello, thank you for your message.” and hope that Person A can in fact carry their end of a conversation.
- Respond with an equally inane “hi”
- Respond with “Hello you’re cute, did you want to get together and fuck?”
- Ignore messages from Person A
If you’re saying nothing more than “hi” you’ve left me with nothing to build a conversation on so why not cut to the chase? You want my dick and I’m willing to let you have it.
The people that most often send “hi” say they want to chat too. Perhaps my first clue is that these people can’t be honest enough with themselves about what they’re really wanting. Maybe I’ll change my profile to “Seeking Kinky SEX “
I’m going to have to start hanging out at the local bar, at least then the person saying “hi” is prepared enough or drunk enough to respond with a sentence… or by paying for the drinks!